I’m Not Crazy by Jeannine Lawall
A story inspired by “Crazy Train,” by Ozzy Osbourne Read on Substack
I’m Not Crazy
People say I’m crazy. I don’t really know if I am; I just know that my brain doesn’t work like most people’s… so if that means I’m crazy, then I guess maybe I might be.
I was happily married, once upon a time, but it soured fast, and he didn’t stick around very long. Not that I can really blame him. I know that I’m hard to live with, but it hurt, because I couldn’t figure out what I’d done wrong.
Like the last time I wound him up: It was the day he left. I guess he couldn’t take it any longer. He marched out, screaming, “You’re driving me insane,” just before he slammed the front door… the very last words I would ever hear from his lips.
You know, he really should have known better than to have made me watch the election results that night. He knew how I hated politics, all that jibber jabber that makes no sense. People should be learning how to love, but instead the world is filling with hate. Crazy, crazy talk! I know now that it was wrong to throw the television out the window, but I’m sorry, I just snapped.
I mean, the television was evil. It blathered on and on, and millions of people just sat there, staring, drinking up whatever the media spooned out. So, yeah, it had to go. And Harry followed right after the telly — though he didn’t go flying out the window, he just slammed the door and walked away.
No, I’m not crazy! Our generation has inherited a nuclear arsenal that could easily destroy the world many times over. So yeah, I’m worried about it, but I figure that that’s a perfectly appropriate defense response. If you were to tell me that you’re not worried, I would figure that you’re mad, drunk, or lying… or maybe that you’d become just plain numb to everything.
Life isn’t fair. I can’t unknow what I’ve learned, and what I’ve learned has destroyed my faith in everything. It’s all lies. I know that I’m going off the rails, but there’s nowhere else to go. No. No, there’s no hope for me. My mind was too fragile and was cracked by watching evil people rule the world. But you… maybe your mind is made of sterner stuff. Please, listen to me. Please, help. We need to teach the world to love… before it’s too late.
Well I guess that’s it. Thanks for listening. I gotta go. The orderly is telling me that it’s time to go back to my room because it’s television time… and I’m not allowed near televisions anymore. And please remember: When you tell the others about this, make sure you tell them… I’m not the one who’s crazy. (snip-a bit more on the page. This writer is talented!)
Scottie's Playtime 