I do this.  I share on this blog.  But if  trouble I call Randy. I desperately do not want to return to the bad times.  But if the nightmares get bad, if I am crying I reach out to him.  Does he deserve to be my main support person?  No, but he is willing to be so.  Just weeks ago I was struggling with self harming again.  I called Randy.  I did not know but I interrupted his getting supper after a hard time at work.  He talked me off the ledge, he calmed me down, and he did not let me off the phone until I assured him I wouldn’t hurt myself.  That is the person Randy is.  I am so sorry to put my friend through this.  Hugs