Ron and I are laid low by the booster. But feeling better as the morning goes on.

It is going to be a long day.  I may not be at the computer much.   Ron is moving better than I but not well.   We both have taken the two main shots of Moldova, and the first booster.   We had no negative reactions.   Never bothered either of us a bit.   

Yesterday we went at noon and got the second booster.   By evening Ron said that the spot he got the shot was swelling and it was hurting.   Mine was still OK.  No problem.   In the middle of the night I woke up in trouble.   I was running a fever, I had chills and was shivering, my arm with the shot was swollen and hurt bad (remember I take medication for pain), and I was having body aches so bad I had to take more medication to just to stand it.  Then by the time the sun came up the muscle spasms started.  

Ron woke up and told me he was having the same.    The good news he said he looked it up and that meant it was working for us.   Really little comfort I can tell you.    I am sipping my coffee and not moving much.  For me sitting letting the pain medication work is the best and helping a lot, for Ron it is moving around and puttering on things.   Both Ron and I are feeling better but I think it will be a long slow day for us with naps.  Drinking coffee helps get rid of the chills.   He says it should go away in a day or so.   I still recommend the boosters just lay in a supply of feel better stuff.     I will say that Odie came in during the night and moved up to my chest and pushed into me as a way to say he knew I did not feel well.   But after a short while it hurt too much to have him there and I moved him to the middle / lower end of the bed.   Hugs

Sigh off on posts and comments / replies.

For over a decade I signed off everything I wrote with hugs.  When asked I explained that I never got touched as a child that was not to harm or hurt and so hugs without a required sexual act became a treat.    But not all adults like to be hugged and some people who I left comments for seriously objected to that sign off.

The history of my hugs sign off was when I started my first blog in 2007 I found a blog by a young gay boy from Europe that always signed off every post or comment reply with hugs.  When asked why he said / wrote that he wrote it was because he cared about everyone and wanted to hug them.   I loved that idea.   

But what caused me to stop the practice was when I was on right wing websites I would forget and sign my comments with hugs or when I wrote a business email I would forget to delete that part of the signature.    Boy the extra abuse was over the top and it seemed to give the rabid right something to focus on rather than my comment.  And for the business email it resulted in weird exchanges.    So, I stopped.  

But it constantly bothers me.  Everything I write seems unfinished without a sign off.  I tried a few times with “Best Wishes”.  But the fact is sadly I do not wish everyone best wishes.  However even an enemy I would offer a hug to.  

I hate the feeling that everything I write is not finished until I add a sign off that is part of me.   I am seriously thinking of going back to Hugs as my sign off.   It just feels right.   For the people I care for I say hugs instead of bye on the phone.  I tried to break myself of that and it seems weird.  

So unless there is a real valid complaint against it, I am going back to using hugs as my sign off.   If I make a mistake and use it on a right wing web site, I will take the abuse.  If any of you have a better idea, then please share it.  If it feels as good to me as “Hugs” I will use it.  Also what is wrong with the US society that consensual hugs between adults are something to be feared?

Please let me know your thoughts.    Hugs. 

The car is home and looks like new

Hey everyone.   An update on our car.   So yesterday we got a call from Bob, a service manager, that the car was ready and to call him.  Ron did not want to deal with it yesterday, so he called him this morning about 9 AM.   At 9:46 I got a call from a desk person saying that Bob was busy with meetings but our car was ready and we could just come in and get it.   I said but we wanted to have a meeting with Bob first.   The person said she was just told us to tell us the car was ready and we could come get it.   I said OK we would, but I wanted her to register with management that I was disgusted that after all this time they thought we should just come get the car like nothing had happened and no one was willing to talk to us about it or give me the detailed list of damage.   At 9:50 Bob called back.  He said it was not meant that way, he was busy in meetings and did not want us to think he was ignoring us and it was not meant that he wouldn’t meet with us … and so on.   

I had a really bad night; I am on day three of the cold which is gone from my head but seems to have settled in my spine.  I have been in a lot of pain from my stupid lifting of the bags of soda, but this morning I was really hurting.  

So we told Bob that if he had time we would come in this morning.   I also told him that the sales department had never contacted us, not even to say they couldn’t work anything out with us.   I explained that I was really pissed at that and wouldn’t buy another vehicle from the dealership.   He really was upset over that and when we met with him he showed us his texts to the person at the dealership and the assurances they would contact us.   He said he was going to contact the person again and raise hell as his word was on the line and it lost the company customers. 

We drove down there and turned in the Lincoln they gave us.  Then we explained we were there to speak to Bob.   He came out and got us.   He talked to us and took us out to the car.  It was a bit of a walk, and he first took us to the wrong car.   It was the wrong color and model, and I was laughing.  He asked what was funny and I said nice car but not ours.   He laughed also.  He found ours nearby.     It was not a big deal.   We looked over the car and talked about a lot of stuff including the value of the car and he told us something we did not know.   Our car is the most sought after model in used cars and that was why he was shocked the salespeople had not contacted us.   I told him how KBB had valued the car at $24,500 and he said we could get a lot more than that for it.   Especially as it has low milage and is pristine inside and out.  

After a while my back was getting to the point where I couldn’t stand upright and was in danger of falling.   I asked if we could go back inside and sit down to keep talking as there was nothing more to be found out by looking at the car.  He agreed and said his back was also bad and it was hurting him also to stand out there.   

Weird thing he served in both the Army and Air Force, and I had served in the Navy and the Army.  It is rare to meet someone who has done more than one branch of the military.  

Back in his office he went through it all, showed us and gave to us not only the parts breakdown but the costs of the repairs.    He was open and honest.   Ron and I told him the history of events before he got involved and after up to the present meeting.  He was very apologetic, and he offered to put it up on a lift so we could look at the underside.   I told him I wouldn’t know what I was looking at and Ron who would know said it was not needed.  He answered every question and spent a lot of time with us.   He gave each of us his card so if we have any questions we could call him.   He even talked to us about which cars were worth looking into and what Ford cars to avoid.    As we were checking out, he came up and gave us a bunch of Ford stuff like hats, key rings, and other things.   He also asked again if I minded if he contacted the sales department because he felt that they wronged us and him, and he did not like that.   Ron was like why bother but I said yes if they call me I might feel more inclined to buy a car from the dealership but if they did not, I wouldn’t ever buy a car from them again and listed nearby Ford dealerships I would look into.   

By this time my back had gone from hurting to super painful.   I couldn’t stand sitting in the chair in his office but when I went to stand up Ron had to help me.   Then on the trip home while the firm seat back felt good against my back every bump, slow down, acceleration, lane switch caused me such pain I was near tears as we were near the store we had planned to get subs from.   Instead Ron brought me home.    Once home I took an extra morphine and two tramadol.   I am still in pain but the medication has dulled the super sharp pain now at an hour plus 30 minutes after taking them.   I can think better again.  The pain was so bad I was almost crying, it was hard to think, and even breathing made it worse.    Ron has decided that I have to schedule the spine shots even though it will cost $300 dollars.  We had a lot of bills hit in February and March so I thought we couldn’t afford the shots.  But while it is not something I am willing to do every two months we can afford it every 4 to 6 months.   And the doctor says I need them, and my body says I need them.  

Ron went out and opened the hood and did some minor vacuuming of the vent trays.  Everything he looked at looked very good to him.   I had asked Bob why the car was in the paint shop, and he explained that the fenders and other parts are neutral color to be painted the color of the car they are going on.  Everything looks great.  The only concern I have is on the way home a person cut us off by moving from the far left lane into the side of our car in the middle lane continuing to the far right lane.   Ron hit the brakes and blew the horn which the person in the car did not care about, but the sensors never registered the near collision.  We also noticed that the Lane Assist system had trouble picking up the lane markings which it always did before.   Ron will call Bob in a bit.   I had hoped the car adventure was over, but it seems to be there are a few more chapters to be written.  

Ron and I have colds.

I can’t win for losing these days.    I was not feeling right the last couple days.   But did not feel bad.  Ron felt bad two days ago and yesterday realized he had a cold.   Too late, we tend to share everything thing.   He has been out to the stores every day for a week or more.  Four days ago he turned down an isle of the grocery store and there was an older couple with a young grandchild right in front of him.   The boy was sneezing, coughing, and wiping his nose on his shirt.  Ron got out of there quick, but we think the germs were quicker.    So he was out of action yesterday.   But other than feeling not quite right I was doing OK.   Not so this morning.   I woke to the grand feeling of a head cold.  I am lucky I have an inhaler designed to dry up my sinuses if I have a bad allergy attack.   I took it this morning and it is working so I can breathe.   But the snot and phlegm that I had to deal with.  Yuck.  Ron stayed in bed until late.   He got up and is not any better but says he doesn’t feel well enough to even sit down so he is doing odds and ends in the kitchen.  Both of us are sucking coffee for the sore throat.   Posting may be normal or less depending on how I feel.   I may sit here and just post, I may just watch videos, or I may go to bed.    The world will have to run a few days without my supervision.   

Ukrainian Nurse Who Lost Legs And Fingers Marries And Regains Her Will To Live

Oksana Balandina, a nurse, lost both her legs and four fingers on one hand in a mine explosion in March. She also lost her will to live, but her family has restored her spirits. At the hospital where she is being treated, they held a wedding ceremony for her and her partner, Viktor Vasylyev. Originally published at – https://www.rferl.org/a/ukraine-nurse…

This is what the Russian war is doing to the people of Ukraine.   There are people alive buried under the rubble in that steel mill and Russia won’t stop the bombing so the Ukrainians can dig them out.  It is past time the countries of the world showed that this inhumanity won’t be allowed to continue.   Russia hopes the world will lose interest and they can be as cruel and destructive to human life as they please.   We cannot let that happen.   This could have been a group of kids that got near that landmine.   Remember Russia dropped thousands of trip wire triggered bombs from the skies over Ukrainian cities and towns.    The idea was to kill and main as many civilians as possible.   The idea is to cause terror so the people will beg Russia for peace at any cost or terms.   The world cannot let this continue.   We have the ability; we just need the will.

Space: 1999: Season 1 Episode 1 – Breakaway (Full Episode)

WATCH Space: 1999: The Complete Series: http://www.shoutfactorytv.com/series/… Subscribe to SHOUTFACTORY: http://bit.ly/1nm0dKP Follow us on TWITTER: https://twitter.com/shoutfactory Like us on FACEBOOK: http://on.fb.me/1nEYhOx Commander John Koenig, the new commander of Moonbase Alpha, leads the investigation of a mysterious disease at the station and uncovers evidence of a far greater looming disaster. Find more great TV shows and movies On Demand: http://www.shoutfactorytv.com/ A diversified multi-platform media company devoted to producing, uncovering, preserving and revitalizing the very best of pop culture, Shout! Factory’s entertainment offerings serve up first-run feature films, original, contemporary, and classic TV series, animation, live music and comedy specials. Shout! Factory owns and operates Shout! Studios, Scream Factory, Shout! Factory Kids, Mystery Science Theater 3000, Timeless Media Group and Shout! Factory TV.

I never got to see these as a kid, for most of my childhood TV was banned for me.   But after becoming an adult on my own I fell in love with shows like this one and other sci-fi shows like Star Trek and Battlestar Galactica, those shows that now look so hooky.    As a young adult on my own I joined one of those video clubs and bought all the shows I could.  I love the shape shifting idea in this one.  These shows helped me form an idea of good people trying hard to do go and not giving in to anger, to doing the right thing when it was not to your advantage because it was the right thing, and to championing being different at being OK.   I hope you enjoy this.  

Let’s talk yesterday

Yesterday started out with me feeling great and fired up and ended up with me in bed at 4PM.  So here is the story.   I have been trying to stay in bed later in the morning and going to bed later at night.   All that seems to do is push everything computer / blog related more into the critical territory of not getting done.  If we get up at the same time Ron wants to talk, wants to make plans, and seems to think he and the cat should have priority over the computer time.  Some people, right?    I on the other hand have a morning routine that involves starting coffee, starting computers if they were shut down, cleaning cat boxes, feeding cat(s), watering cat(s) (why I do that he is already big enough, but they say it is a requirement).   By then the coffee is ready, I take a new hot cup of coffee to my desk to begin glancing at headlines and replying to comments.    That normally gives me about two hours before Ron gets up and by then I am ready for a break anyway.   Odie after eating settles on my desk.   It is nice and quiet, and before the door to my office was borrowed and yet to be replaced, it was private time.   That has not been happening since we had the idea of us getting up together, which is not working out anyway.   So I am going back to getting up when I wake up at 5, or 5:30, or 6 am at the latest.   I will let Ron sleep until 7:30, or 8, or 8:30 as he wishes.   

I also have been trying to do more around the house to strengthen my muscles and get them used to moving again.   No heavy stuff or low bending.   But things like cooking meals which I enjoy, trying to do light housework like vacuuming using the Dyson stick vacuum we bought a few years ago because it was light.   For example, I made an egg meat scramble with ham, sausage, and bacon for supper for everyone a few nights ago.   I was not hungry yesterday morning, but Ron wanted to make deviled eggs, so I boiled 9 eggs and peeled them.   I called the dealership and let my inner anger boil over a bit by just not letting the service advisor talk on about things trying to again divert me.  I informed her that nothing promised had been given to us, no calls from management, no calls from the sales department, and no preliminary report of assessed damages. She started to say they did not have that yet because the vehicle was not finished.   I said I did not ask for the finished one did I.  I told her I was getting ready to go out to look at other car manufactures and wanted that information asap.   No argument. 

Ten minutes later I got a call back from Service Manager Bob.   We put Bob on speaker phone and had a long conversation with him.   He was more than decent.  He had been out with Covid.   He did not know we had not been contacted.  He did not know our concerns were not addressed, he said the salespeople were told not to contact us as we were at the dealership and told they did not have what we wanted.    He told us they had added on to the car wash building and the employee came around the corner not knowing the new addition and hit an aluminum pole.   The pole hit the front sweet spot to cause a lot of hood, sensor, fender, cosmetic damage, but no real mechanical damage.   Ron peppered him with questions on the front end, drive axles and stuff, and he said none of that was effected,  he said the pole crumpled as it was light weight.   I asked about the frame.   He said their insurance people checked all that to see if they should just total the car out and it was not that badly damaged.   He said the delay was getting the parts to fix it, they got the big parts and I guess painted some they had the right color, but the small parts they couldn’t seem to get.   I complained about our visit to the sales department because I had been told the service department would work with sales to help us trade with full value if there was a question.   He said he was the one that said that  (I thought he was out with Covid and just getting back) and he said that that he was going to check into the situation and see what the problem was.   Surprisingly about ten minutes later he did call back.   He said that the person I talked to over there did not understand the situation, and that me and the salesman we talked to did not hit it off.   Someone from the sales department was going to call us about setting us up on the waiting list for a 2023.   

After all this it was into the afternoon, after 1 PM.  So I started to make goulash.   Here are the pictures.   

large elbows

I decided to go with large elbows instead of small ones or shells.

seasonings I used

These are the seasonings I used.   I also used 3 beef bouillon.   I used a bit over a pound of 80 / 20 hamburger.   Cook the meat in the tomato sauce as the fats add flavor and more juice.    For the base I used 2 large bottles of tomato juice.   As you can see below, I like a brothy soup like sauce to add over the pasta in a bowl.  If you put the pasta in the sauce the pasta sucks up the liquid.   That is why you want to store the pasta wet in a dry container.   If your fridge is cold enough the wet will keep it from sticking together but the pasta won’t get soggy like it will if you store it in water.    

suacegoulash

So it was after 3 when we ate, I had not eaten all day so the sliding scale for insulin was very little.   I did not plan to overdo so I did not take extra, which led to the problem that happened.   Ron had gone back to painting the new room, and I volunteered to pick stuff up.   As I worked in the kitchen I stayed away from the candy cupboard and felt proud of myself.   But the jar of peanut butter was sitting right by the toaster.  It kept calling to me.   Then when I opened the fridge I noticed the grape jam sitting right in front on the top shelf.   It was a sign from the sweetness god to have some.   So I made a large P and J heavy on the Jam.    Then I took a couple of the rolls we had with the goulash and made some jam rolls again heavy on the jam.   I finished cleaning up.  By 4 PM I was not feeling well.   I was so tired, my blood sugar was way too high.   I was also struggling with my back.   So I told Ron I was going to bed for a couple hours.   He knew I had done a lot and did not think anything of it.   I did not start to feel well again until 8 PM and then I took my blood sugar and it was 208.  More than 4 hours after eating.   I failed to tell Ron, it skipped my mind I guess.   I stayed in bed.

This morning I did mention in passing to Ron that the peanut butter had jumped right off the counter at me.  He wanted to know what I ate, all of what I ate.   He got really upset.   He chewed my butt saying that that much sugar with so little insulin could have put me in a coma or caused other serious conditions.   I will say it was the fastest I have seen him wake up in the morning in years.  I doubt I will get away with that for a while, he will watch what I try to sneak, even count the Oreos.  

So after I post this I am determined to answer / catch up with all the comments.   No posting news until then.  I have over 100 open news articles. (divided into four different tabs)   Maybe post a video or two as I watch them while answering comments, that will be okay.  

And the car saga continues

It is 3:30 PM my time.   We stopped on the way home and picked up some wings of assorted flavors and after eating took a nap.  Got up at three.  I shut down the video computer and unplugged everything, Ron placed it on the table.   I opened it all up and took the front off so Ron could clean it all up.  Then I am going to replace the hard drive and see what I need to install an SSD drive.   I have to replace the hard drive in it as I have an issue developing with it that I need to run a hard drive portioning / repairing program over it.   Then I will shut down this one and let Ron clean the insides of it also as this one as the CPU chip is overheating in it.    Ron cleaned both of them really well not too long ago but we have a long haired cat whose hair goes every / anywhere.   When we took off the fan over the CPU heatsink the cat hair was matted into the fins of that.  How I don’t know.  I never had these troubles when I had my computers up on shelves.   Seems being on floor level they become dirt magnets.   I will be having them up off the floor in the new office.  

The car saga.   Remember we were told first the car was hit and then they couldn’t move it because they were waiting for the police to come and make a police report.   Then we were told that an employee had rammed the car into a pole.  But that meant they moved the car.   It was staged so Ron wouldn’t see what it hit.  We figured out why they only wanted one of us to see the car, so we couldn’t back each other up on what we seen.   By only Ron saying what he seen, it is a he said they say issue.   Then we were not able to find a police report, so we called the police, and the insurance company.   The police said they were called there two days prior for an accident on the ground but not for our car ever.    The insurance company said they would have been sent the police report automatically and were not.  

So we took the loaner Lincoln car which is nice but has an all dark interior and drove to the dealership.   As we drove up to the sales area there were two guys out front.   I figured this was going to be easy because when we bought the car there they were more than happy to work a deal.  Not this time.   As I got out, I noticed neither guy walked up to us.   As we started to the building one guy called out, “What are you guys looking for”?     I said I was interested in the Escape hybrid Titanium with all the options.  Guy looked at his phone and said he had an SEL and one other, both I understood to be midrange.  I said no I would be ordering one if I were to buy.  “No you won’t they have closed orders on 2022 Escape Hybrids” he said.    I asked if other dealerships might have what we wanted and he shrugged.   We don’t trade cars anymore as no one wants to do that as their own demand is too high, he told us.   I was getting really pissed.   He lost interest the minute he realized what I wanted, and he did not have it.    I was getting angry.  Did not even offer to help us into a different vehicle.

We drove further into the lot to the repair area and went in.  We waited while they found the service advisor Deborah.    Remember I called her three times yesterday and she never called us back.  So when she walked up to us the first thing she said was she had a plumbing emergency at home and was not there yesterday, to which I turned to Ron and said they kept telling me she was, and they would deliver the message.   Then seeing she was caught she was there in the morning but had to leave early.  We understood emergencies but about 30 minutes later I would ask her about the water emergency and the story changed again.    So I told her the reason I wanted her was mute because the dealership did not have the car we wanted and was unwilling to help us get one.   I explained I wanted that detailed list of damages as I was going to go to other dealerships, even the other manufacturers to see if I could work a deal.    Well that sent her into overdrive and she got us sitting down and went to talk to her manager again.  When she got back she told us there was a waiting list for the 2022 Escape Hybrids and anyone still on the list was going to get the 2023-year ones automatically.  Were we interested?   I said yes.  So she disappeared again.   When she came back she said that she was to call a person named Shelly in the sales department and that she would try to work a deal to get us on the 2022 list to get a 2023 for the 2022 price.  But you might not get delivery for 6 months or more she said.  I said as long as the numbers are locked in and we either keep our Escape to drive or their Lincoln loaner I did not care.  I told her to make me sad, have us drive their loaner Lincoln for 6 months.  She laughed.   But then I asked her about her water emergency and if there was a lot of damage.   Oh no she replied they had an odor issue with their water as many on well water here do, so had new pipes and pump in the well all redone.   But the smell was still there so the company was coming to bore out the pipes they had not changed.   Which told me she knew she was taking the afternoon off for an appointment and did not have an emergency and just blew us off.   She also managed to get away without giving us a detailed list of damage to our car.   Seems they really do not want us to have that.   

And now to shut off this computer for Ron to clean.   Best wishes.  Scottie

Comments and posts

So yesterday morning I got off a few posts, we got busy going back and forth with the dealership.  Found out what happened to the car on Friday but even though they said they would give it to us they have failed to turn over a detailed list of the damages.   Turns out that an employee rammed it into a post.   Plus the part of how they couldn’t move it was a lie as they moved it to where they showed it to Ron.   We got home yesterday, ate, napped, and when we got up found we had no innerwebs for the rest of the day.   Today we will spend checking out the new Ford Hybrid Escape.   We will have to have the salespeople deal with the situation if we like the car, because I am too pissed off to be civil about it.   So if the innerwebs are working when I get home and I feel halfway up to it, I will try to answer the growing comment list.  There is a lot of great news happening including that Finland says they are readying for a Russian attack and the UE is thinking of having an article 5 clause.   That would be one way to enter the Ukrainian conflict without being NATO that does it.  The problem is the EU has some very sketchy countries in it right now.  Until we meet again, best wishes.   

Ron is home, and not a minute too soon

Hello all you wonderful Playtime readers / viewers.   As some of you may have noticed I started off the beginning of last week doing great with news posting and answering comments.   By the end of the week it was sporadic and haphazard.    

The reason for that is that Ron had to make a trip to North Carolina to pick up his sister and go to the nursing home where his brother is a resident.  His brother is 76 years old (I think 75 or 76) and is in and out of reality.   He is doing so much better in the home.   There reaches a point where people who are alone need extra help to take care of themselves and their age and health break down.  He would have died a couple years ago if Ron and the sister had not taken extreme measures to get him into a nursing home program.  The brother is poor, of course we the public mostly are, and nursing home care costs like six grand a month for those that can pay, for those on social security and SSI, your screwed.   The brother had physical and mental issues that were getting worse because he was not able to take care of himself both medically and physically such as cook for himself or do what he needed to do health wise.  Sorry if that sounds vague but I am trying to respect his brother’s privacy.  

Long story short because of Medicaid rules the brother had to be in a nursing home to qualify to be in a nursing home.  Go figure!  So to meet that requirement the sister had to pay 5 grand for the first month to get him in and then another time to keep things going another 3 grand.  She has more money than most but she is not wealthy.  She is 72, was a single mother who held two jobs at the same time and she has a retirement fund she put into all her life that she drew on to do this.   Later in life she met a grand guy she married who also worked hard and put money away and supported the sister doing this for her brother.  

Under Medicaid / SSi rules (Ron and the sister can tell you all the details, I am only going on what I was told by them) the brother can only have or keep about $30 dollars of his social security income plus he can have only limited if any assets.   So no matter what his social security payment is all but $30 dollars is taken and given to the nursing home.  The government doesn’t care about a person’s bills or dignity.   People that can afford to pay get a private room, the poor like Ron’s brother have to have a roommate that they get no say in having.  Ron’s sister (Diane, sorry I got tired of typing the sister and realized I would have to add another sister to the mix) now controls the brother’s finances as Ron controls the medical stuff for the brother.   Ron, Diane, and one other sister put a set amount into the brother’s bank account to pay his existing bills and cover his needs.  We do not begrudge this even though the other brothers with more funds than we have chosen not to help. 

So that is why Ron left for NC on the 11th of April, to fix a situation that had developed, see the brother, and handle paperwork regarding the brother’s care.   I got a treatment on that same Monday to help with my back spasms which involved 8 or 10 (I forget the exact number right now but that is around the normal number.   It is never less than 8 and rarely more than 16 anymore.  The most I had is 21 but I had lost the ability to walk and was in really bad condition when that happened.)  I took our second vehicle, a 2007 Toyota van still in good shape, and after the treatment I felt great.       The treatment itself is really painful but I have learned a long time ago to shut off / diminish / bear the pain I know is coming. 

For those not aware my body is wrecked, and I am limited in what I can do without severe pain.    I was built on a Monday by those paid on Thursday who spent the next four days in the bars on a bender and were seriously hung over on Monday when they built me.  That and the damage caused by childhood abuse caused my body to deteriorate / deform / decay and by my 30’s I was unable to do things most people enjoy doing without thinking about it that much.  Even my last year in the military to try to march caused me a lot of pain in my hips but because I only needed to do that for a couple special occasions, I did not think of it too much.   I should have, it would have granted me a military disability pension but I was still sure I was a healthy young person back then.     But my husband and love of my life for 32 years has stood by me and as I was able to do less, he simply did more to cover what I couldn’t do.   One of those things is the housework.   When Ron left James stepped up and tried to take over all the household things Ron normally did.   But James is working long hours with lots of overtime and I simply did not want him to come home after working a 16 hour shift to worry about doing things around the house that I felt I could handle for a week.  But every day after he got home he would offer to do anything needing to be done and I would send him to bed as he had to get back up and do his job again in less than 8 hours.  

Long story short because this is turning into a novel, the first several days I felt great and maybe over did as the steroids coursed through me.   But I was handling it I thought.  then towards the end of the week I did something really stupid that I knew not to do.  Everyone can yell at me for it, I already am paying the price.   I went grocery shopping, got the few things that we ran out of while Ron was gone and the two local Publix stores had a bunch of the soda I like for a great price.   Now the price is normally over a dollar but they had a get 5 for $5 and most importantly they had the amounts to sell, which normally they only have like three or four.  I got 20.   Yes twenty 2 litter bottles and I thought I was a king.  I got a few other things like a gallon of milk (gods are cows in short supply or something?  $5 for a gallon of milk?  I am going to need to use water for my breakfast cereal) I was so proud of myself for taking care of the house and getting supplies.  Here is where I screwed up.

Before I left I separated and started laundry.   I normally do the laundry, but Ron takes it out of the dryer so I don’t stress my back by bending over and we put the stuff on our bed to fold / hang up and Ron helps, or does it himself when my back is hurting too much for me to bend over to do it.  Ron was not here and I was about to screw up badly.  

I got home with the groceries and the 20 bottles of soda.   Ron normally keeps reusable heavy bags in the car for groceries so we don’t use as many plastic bags, and he puts like five bottles of soda in a bag and carries them in.   He refuses to let me carry them and I felt I had a chance to now prove to him I could do it also.   I was wrong.   Boy James was upset when he got up for work.  More on that later.   

So seeing Ron carry five bottles at a time in each arm and James just picks up  armfuls of them like whatever amount is there and carries them like nothing.  Must be nice to be 30 and have a body that still works.  I filled two bags with five each and started into the house.   To reach the kitchen the shortest route is through my office from the driveway and then through the open concept living room / kitchen to the actual kitchen area itself.   I did not make it through my office.   I set one bag down and struggled with the one five bottle bag.  I set it down, went and got the second bag of five.    Then I went out to get more.   This time I took three and only one bag.   I was down to one bottle in one bag before I was done.   The milk nearly made me burst into tears.   I took extra medication.   But I still had the laundry to do.  

After resting and letting the medications work, morphine is my best friend and I am resisting going to Fentanyl as it scares me what I hear about it, I took the stuff out of the dryer, placed them on the bed, and took care of them.   That evening when James got up for work he realized something was wrong, he kept asking me if I was ok.  Of course, I told him, I just had a busy day, no problems.   That night I got some sleep and the next morning I started doing more laundry.  When James got home after a long shift he asked what he could do for me.   He wanted to know if any housework needed to be done and he took the trash out to the end of the driveway.   No I lied to him, everything is fine, I think later I may do some stuff but all is good.  He went to bed.  I did several loads of laundry.   I am not sure if that is the day I tried to vacuum the floors or not, but whatever the point is I over did.   My back gave out.  Over the weekend I could hardly walk, I couldn’t sit in my chair at my desk for very long and stopped trying to do any of the normal work like putting dishes in the dishwasher.   I was in so much pain at times my back would spasm and it would cause me to catch my breath because it was such a sudden pain. At night I couldn’t sleep even with medication the muscles in my back spasmed and the nerves in my spine where either pinched or pulled causing either sudden shooting pain, constant burning feelings, or my feet to suddenly try to force my toes from my body.  

Needless to say I was miserable.  I could barely walk and was using my canes in the house something I normally don’t do.   James noticed and he was really upset.   He took it personally, refusing to understand I thought I could do it myself and just misjudged.     He refused to go to bed until he went through the house doing everything he could think of that needed to be done including making several meals up for the day.  He kept asking why I had not asked him to bring them in?  When I said he was working and I simply should have tried fewer bottles he did not buy it.   First he said he wouldn’t have minded getting up to do it and then that they could have stayed in the van until morning when he got home for him then to carry them in.  Hard to argue with him on that point, the guy is smart.   Needless to say all weekend and today when James woke up, he comes out of his room to see if I needed anything.   He has repeatedly told me he is getting me a different desk chair when he can afford to as he thinks the chair is hurting my back.  Thinks I need something called a zero gravity gaming chair.  

So that is why I have not gotten to the comments nor done my normal posting for a few days.   I have been posting things that do not take so much mental effort and been slow on the comments (which I love) because when I am in this much pain even thinking is hard.  Even when in bed trying to get my back to release it is hard to concentrate when in this much pain.  If I take enough medication to cover the pain more than I normally do, I cannot think due to the medications.  To write this I have had to go lay down twice.  It is easier to read news on my phone or pad and to watch videos that don’t take a lot of thought than things I normally like to consume and share.   

Anyway Ron is home, and when he got in he could hardly walk.  It was a long trip even though at my insistence he took an extra day on the way home.  As crippled up as he was, he refused to let me carry anything heavy and only let me have a few light things to carry in as he had heard from James what I had done.  I am sure that when he gets up I will hear about it.   Good thing I made a really good spaghetti red sauce a few days ago.  That will put him in a good mood because he loves my cooking.  Plus James went to work and won’t be here to tattle on me.   Ok my back burns like someone has a blow torch on my spine so I will do a few comments and then go lay down again.   Best wishes to everyone.  Scottie