Category: Violence
The Importance Of Ukraine
Shit, shit, he knows, hell I told him. It hurts. He hugged me.
I don’t really know how to write this. It has been so upsetting to me, yet he needed to know, and his not knowing was also becoming a problem. I was trying so hard to hide it all from him that it was causing him to wonder why some things were causing me to have issues.
Yesterday I arranged for each of us to get three vaccines from our local Walgreens pharmacy. We both got the covid, the flu, and the RSV vaccine shot. Then today I went and got my three allergy shots.
When I got home I started doing dishes, Ron talked about not wanting me to work so hard in the house, as he was trying to get a door up between our living room and the rest of the house that the Hurricane Ian ripped off. But then we started talking. And my world went South, East, North, West, and all over the map.
I don’t know how the conversation came up, but it had something to do with my adoptive family and the hell spawn that abused me. Ron said something about one of the hell spawn siblings, and it just slipped out. I really never wanted to tell him, I told myself I wouldn’t. But dogs that love gravy I did.
I told him how the hell spawn knew I was adopted, and because there was an ambiguity over if I was really a member of the family or not. Because the adoptive mother wanted me, but it became clear fast the adoptive father did not. He made it clear I was not a member of the family. But when I stopped being a cute toddler, she lost interest in me also.
But back to today. Ron mentioned something from the hell spawn, and I just started to tell him. As I have said in 2007 on our way home I told him I had been abused but never told him more details and he said he had figured that out. But then he has lived with me having terrible nightmares where I relive being raped or beaten. So really I understood he would understand. He has woken me when I was begging or screaming in my sleep.
I am not sure how it started now, my mind is trying hard to bury it. But I started by telling him of the Vet across the street that was fucking me at 4, then I told him the worst of it, starting with how the hell spawn daughter / sister who was in charge of us at night would get her boyfriend sexual excited and then let him have me to satisfy his need. She got pregnant at 14 like her mother, married by 15. Three marriages, two of her husbands would molest / rape me. One of her husbands loved to play with little boys wieners, especially when he was inside me. I told him how each of the male hell spawn of the family who were teens used me repeatedly. And how they let their friends have me. I told him one of their fun games was forcing me to the top of the staircase, then pushing / throwing me down it. Betting on how far I would go, how many times I would bounce, stuff like that. And then the most painful, I told him parts, but not all of the abuse by the adoptive father. He more than any others enjoyed hurting me. Maybe because he never wanted me at all, but regardless, the things he enjoyed doing to me, I still can not face today.
Once I started, I just couldn’t stop. I told him of the beatings, the sexual assaults, the fear of them all, the time the one hell spawn I thought I could trust to be my friend lay on top of me hitting me saying admit your gay, admit your gay. I was 5 years old and she was 10, and had no idea what she was hitting me for. Then she said because guys fuck you, you play with their dicks. What, why is that wrong? It is not like I had a choice! I told him of the beatings, and other attempts to break my bones, and how the hell spawn used me sexually. I nearly broke when I told him how one of then raped me so badly, I described to him how I was then beaten for soiling my sheets. One of the hell spawn like to pee on me at night to get me into trouble, and when I finally got a bed I would wake up to him peeing on me and I knew in the morning I would again be blamed for wetting the bed. The adoptive parents either did not believe me or thought it funny.
He already knew how until I was like 7 or more, I slept in a hallway, because as my adoptive mother told me I did not need or deserve a bedroom / bed like the other kids. Often they would take me to their beds, and I knew the price for the privilege and yes I willingly paid it. Wouldn’t you? I told him parts of my summer in Canada, and he said it explained why I wouldn’t have anything to do with the adoptive father’s mother when I was an adult and she would be visiting. I refused to be in the same room with her. He always wondered about that.
I could go on, but I got a lot of stuff out that I had hidden from him. Then suddenly after I was done explaining everything to him, or at least a lot that he did not know, I suddenly had the fear I always have had all my life. I suddenly worried he wouldn’t love me, I was damaged, I had been fucked by a lot of boys / men not him. I was less than, used and … Hell and shit, why did I tell him so much I had kept hidden! Why now damn it! 34 years I had kept it hidden … yet today I exploded with the sexual and physical abuse information. I know that is stupid to think that way, but he never knew the details. I had kept them from him, leaving it vague. He knew I was abused, but not the details, now he knows details.
I did not even tell him about the court ordered visits to doctors or therapist. And how the cop that escorted me used it to have a tryst with his mistress, with me listening through the open door, seeing some of it. Thankfully I don’t remember him telling me to join them, but as conditioned as I was, I would have.
But as I was getting to the worst of it he sat next to me, and then as I was starting to falter and feel I did the very wrong thing, he slowly reached out to me. I realize now that he did not want to trigger me. He stood up, came over closer and gently hugged me. I was trying to say I was sorry, I did not mean to tell him, but he just held me. Then after he let me go he suggested I go wash my face but he told me as I turned away. “I love you, I have always loved you. This changes nothing how I feel about you.” He said a lot of comforting things, things like they can’t hurt you and you won’t ever have to see them again, some are dead. But he knows they still hurt me, they haunt me. The memories are always there somewhere, waiting to pop back up.
He made me a small supper but I was so upset I hardly ate. Then he suggested I go to bed for a while. But I struggled to sleep. He came down to check on me and then rubbed my back and arms until I fell asleep.
All that happened yesterday. We got up about 3:45 am because Tupac wanted food and then out to do what cats do outside. I am fixing errors, stuff that needed reworking, then I will post it. Ron is treating me really softly this morning, he knows I got very little sleep. My emotions are all over the place, my nerves are raw. Maybe getting it out, letting him know the details, maybe the memories will let me rest, let me be for a while. I have a doctor’s appointment this morning. Oh well. Hugs to all.
How Israel FOOLED The West | Hasanabi reacts to Video Leaks
Notice how Bibi says they have to hit Palestinians hard and relentlessly. Notice he doesn’t want to even slow down to get the hostages. It is all about hurting Palestinians and taking Gaza. Then when asked how the world will see Israel, Bibi dismisses. So what he says. When asked about the US he mocks the US, talked about how he took on Bill Clinton, how he manipulated the US congress, how he sabotaged the Oslo Accords. He said that The US did not matter, he could make the US do anything he wanted. That is how the Israeli government sees the US and we are to give them 14 billion more dollars with no strings attached. No Fucking Way! Hugs. Scottie
Lead ‘Scream’ Actress Fired For Defending Palestinians And Agreeing With The UN
Jonothan Michael Dewey
I wish I had a way on your blog to express both my sympathy and my anger at what happened. I wish so much you would allow comments. But if this is the only way to show sympathy and anger at what happened, then so be it.
I want so much to give each of you peace and justice. But what I want is not going to happen any more than I can imagine what you wanted to happen, did. In truth, I really wish, with no documentation, you could have your wish. I know I would hate to know of the result, but something inside me says you are owed that. Hugs. Scottie
Owen Jones OWNS Piers Morgan on his DOWNPLAYING of Israel’s onslaught
Wow, between Lance and Morgans guest, they rip open the lies of the Israeli government and the media that supports them. If you want the truth of what is happening, then watch this no matter who hard it is. Hugs. Scottie-+
TRUMP Quotes Hitler…AGAIN! Bernie Sanders Breaks Up A Fight | Christopher Titus | Titus Podcast
Israeli Minster FLOUNDERS Interview on Mehdi Hasan Show
This video points out the repeated lies of the Israeli government. We simply can not accept anything they say at face value. Hugs, Scottie
Johnson: America Deserves God’s Wrath For Permitting “Dark And Depraved” Things Like Young LGBTQ People
Again because people were not paying attention, the religious fanatics moved into positions of power. Now they want to enforce their own personal way of life on everyone and are willing to destroy democracy to do it. The public should take these people as a warning of how they want to erase our personal liberties to eased their religious fears. Think of it, if you read both this post and the article you see that he is claiming that his god will not give good things to our country, which to be honest has really been so far his god giving good things to white people, but will now be mean to … again white people because the very people Mike Johnson thinks are bad have gained more equality in the cis hetero world. He really thinks we are inventing new ways to be “evil”. Hell’s bells and my dogs that love gravy how weird is this guy to think that people only started to do bad stuff now that gays have the right to marry and kids can come out at school? Really what about slavery, what about the atrocities all through history including the Holocaust and the dark ages, Spanish Inquisition, and the horrible things Columbus and his people did. But gay kids are where his god draws the line???? Think of the things being done in Gaza, but his god is more upset that a boy finds another boy sexually attractive so that is why he will destroy the country? Think about where and why these people focus on. Worth the read for both. Hugs
Rolling Stone reports:
Talking to pastor Jim Garlow on a broadcast of the World Prayer Network, Johnson spoke ominously of America facing a “civilizational moment.” He said, “The only question is: Is God going to allow our nation to enter a time of judgment for our collective sins? Or is he going to give us one more chance to restore the foundations and return to Him?”
The segment was filmed Oct. 3, just weeks before Johnson’s unexpected rise to become speaker of the House. Garlow pressed the clean-cut Louisiana congressman to say “more about this ‘time of judgment’ for America.” Johnson replied: “The culture is so dark and depraved that it almost seems irredeemable.” He cited, as supposed evidence, the decline of national church attendance and the rise of LGBTQ youth — the fact, Johnson lamented, that “one-in-four high school students identifies as something other than straight.”
Discussing the risk of divine retribution, Johnson invoked Sodom, the Old Testament city destroyed by God for its wickedness with a rain of burning sulfur. Johnson is a polished orator, but in a closing prayer with Garlow he grew tearful. Johnson intoned, “We repent for our sins individually and collectively. And we ask that You not give us the judgment that we clearly deserve.”
Read the full article. Longtime JMG readers may recall that Jim Garlow appeared here many times starting around 15 years ago, usually for “gays are satanic” type rants.
In 2010, Garlow declared that God passed Proposition 8 in California because Christians nationwide had fasted against same-sex marriage.
In 2017, we heard from Garlow when he called for a national tax to be given to churches for them to provide healthcare to congregants, as “health is God’s issue.”
In 2021, Garlow led a group of evangelicals in marching around the Georgia Capitol building seven times to prevent Democrats from winning.
Garlow is the co-author of the so-called Manhattan Declaration, which calls on Christians to disobey all pro-LGBTQ ordinances and laws.
PREVIOUSLY ON JMG: Pastor Jim Garlow calls for an armed uprising against the nation’s LGBTQ people. Pastor Jim Garlow claims that Christians who hate homosexuals will be rewarded with an eternal celestial orgy when they reach heaven. Pastor Jim Garlow says Satan is a gay activist. Pastor Jim Garlow says God has forgiven Newt Gingrich for his serial adultery.
Horrifying, really
I cannot emphasize enough that that man is dangerous. He believes that he has been placed there by God to claim the united states government for his narrow radical view of Christianity. Him + Trump represent an existential threat to the republic.
Imagine that the person with these horrifying views is two heartbeats away from being president of the U.S.!!
That is so frightening!
Two heartbeats away? He already is the beating heart of the Speaker of the House!
In its early days, our “Christian” nation wiped out most of the indigenous people and brutally enslaved millions of Africans. More recently, it fabricated excuses to start two bloody and futile wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, in which untold innocent civilians and children died.
If those and other atrocities didn’t piss off the Christian god, then he either doesn’t exist or has very warped priorities.
These people are gleefully watching whats happening in Israel because, to them, it means Baby Jesus is returning any day now so he’s trying to “save” as many Americans as possible before the end.
Its horrifying, absolutely.
Absolutely. Their doctrine says the Jerusalem Temple must be rebuilt before Jesus can return. And when he does, all Jews who have not accepted him as Savior will be obliterated. Which is all of them.
What’s appallingly cynical is that while most Jews probably don’t know this, the Israeli government certainly does, and is happy to accept evangelicals’ support even knowing what’s supposed to happen to them.
And no, they do NOT want peace, because then Jesus won’t be coming. War is a necessary precursor.
Yeah, what is this obsession with us queer-folk?
Jealous of the great blow jobs he’ll never get nor welcoming tight holes.
Religious fanaticism is really the biggest danger to civilization.
I wonder if it will be that, or the devastating effects of climate change that will finally be the end of us humans.
I think we deserve it, either way, for doing so very little to counter either extreme danger.
This guy’s really dangerous. They really managed to sneak the guy in there without any proper due diligence, didn’t they? I recall that screaming shrew shouting down the reporter who asked the question about election denial. “How *dare* you apply scrutiny to us?!!”
Every Republican supported him, and none of those Republicans are facing angry constituents calling for their removal from office any time soon… so this is apparently what Republican voters want from DC.
I fully expect the dark money’d interests already knew how twisted and perverted this miserable piece of shit is before they insisted on his installation.
It’s right there in the book of Ezekiel: Sodom and Gomorrah were not destroyed due to gay people living in them. They were destroyed because violent residents violated their cultural guest laws, harassing and robbing visitors and migrants asking for help.
You can always tell what kind of Xtian you’re dealing with depending whether they actually understand the lesson in their own book or if they simply apply whatever interpretations they want in order to justify their own appalling, hateful behavior.
They ignore the part where Lot offers his daughters to the angry crowd, then later the part where Lot has sex with his daughters.
Lot offered his own four daughters to appease the soldiers to prevent them from killing the two angels he was saving in his house. For his protection from the angry mob and the soldiers, the angles made everyone who protest to become blind. This made the soldiers angry, and they raped Lot as punishment for protecting those angels, which was commonly done to control their victims.
Angels then told Lot to run away with his daughters because they were going to destroy those two mythical cities for their inhospitality and cruelty.
For one thing, there is no ancient archeological evidence that Sodom and Gomorrah ever existed. They are not on any ancient maps. As typical with most Biblical stories, they are parables to learn from except for those Christian apologists who take everything out of context to justify their bigotry and ignorance.
Christians ignore what the Bible actually says about Sodom and Gomorrah. We weren’t the cause, we were the punishment, at least the first level of punishment.
Frankly, it’s pretty insulting, but the way THEY act is what’s raising the threat level…
Christians ignore a lot of the bible. They sure focus on the hate, some of them
Looking back, if I had a safe and supportive environment when first realized I was Trans at age 15 I believe my life would have been much easier. Not perfect but easier.
This religious fanatic needs to mind his own freaking business.
Minding their own freaking business is something that christian republicans (is that an oxymoron?) are totally incapable of doing.
But, just try to get into their business, and they’ll shriek and claim persecution!
And that is why it is so important that all trans and non-binary come out. To find each other so they can comfort and support each other and show that this is ok and part of normal life. That’s the reason christStains are so against any kind of equality and normalization of all genders. Because it goes against their hate and deludes opportunities to grift money. The only reason growing up trans was hard for you and growing up gay was hard for me is because of hateful religion.
Young Americans are running screaming from Christianity because of creeps like YOU, shithead. Now go share some porn links with your son
Ethics, reason, conscience? These are all counterbalances against religion, superstition, and bigotry.
Teabagger’s or MAGAt’s, still the same haters.
I am to the point that I want to snap and throw any cross I see. It’s just a fucking swastika straightened out to me. Symbol of hate.
And, if you think about it, the cross was essentially used as a torture device.
It says a lot about a religion that chose that as its representative symbol.
Johnson is quite delusional and hiding a deep dark secret about himself, as we’re all quite aware. NO ONE ever goes that deep into how to ‘eliminate’ our clan than those who are deep DEEEEPPPP in a violent and sad closet.
Johnson and his son share a porno filter. That’s pretty fucking weird. And the wife speaks in baby talk. Fucking creepy.
Yeah, there’s seriously something off about this guy, beyond the usual bigotry. The prissy zealotry is extremely creepy. (Along with those other signs like the weird youthful adoption and the porn monitoring with his son.)
Some of them just seem ignorant, blind cultists. But this guy is full-on creepster culty since he’s clearly intelligent enough, or should be, to have some grounding in the real world. If I had children, I wouldn’t let him anywhere near them. He gives off serious pervy vibes.
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America Deserves God’s Wrath For Permitting “Dark And Depraved” Things Like Young LGBTQ People Republicans.
Why is one of the default babble verses against LGBTQI+ always include the story of Sodom and Gomorrah? Interesting that the post script to those verses was the daughters of Lot getting him drunk and having sex with him to supposedly make sure the world didn’t die with no survivors.
And I ALWAYS have the counterweight babble verses to this. Why was sodom and gomorrah destroyed? Because they did things that was against the traditions of the peoples in those lands at that time. And these traditions are timeless so it also applies to us in this time an place.
Ezekiel 16:48-50
•As surely as I live, declares the Sovereign LORD, your sister Sodom and her daughters never did what you and your daughters have done. “‘Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. They were haughty and did detestable things before me. Therefore I did away with them as you have seen. (NIV)
They’ll never except the truth of what it says.
Interesting that the post script to those verses was the daughters of Lot getting him drunk and having sex with him to supposedly make sure the world didn’t die with no survivors.
And likely what really happened was Daddy got loopy, knocking up the daughters, then blaiming them. Imagine the two boys that were birthed. He was their father AND grandfather their mom’s were their half-sisters, and each mom was the aunt to the other’s kid. And it, apparently, was all A-OK with the big sky fairy.
Sounds a lot like the arrogant, overfed and unconcerned congress critters not helping the poor, the sick etc better reread that part of the Bible quickly.
Gurrrrl, you in trouble.
I am not threatened by the existence of LGBTQ people. Certain groups of church-going Christians, however…
Hey Maggot — your god CREATED Young LGBTQ People.
Paaaahraise Jaaaaysus !!
I have long said that if God hates gay people, then He fucked up royally when He had a hand in our creation. He is supposed to know all the past, the present, and the future. So how did we slip through? The answer we always get from the “religious ones” is that we “choose” to be gay. Stop choosing and you’ll be OK. See?
Homosexuality is a natural and a normal expression of human sexuality. It always has been, it always will be, and after all of us, here, are dead – and our existence forgotten – there will still be gay-oriented babies being born on every continent, in every country, and in every culture
Same as it ever was
That’s a little piece of truth they left out of both the Old and the New Testicles.
First, they never think deeply about that and they became str8 the first time they got excited when they caught a glimpse of her panties or her bra straps or big tits, etc.I actually asked a coworker that once, and that is the paraphrased answer he gave me. He became str8 when he first got hot over a girl. It’s so easy. I realized that the thinking was so shallow that further discussion was useless.
So God sat back as gave a 👍🏼 to more than years of slavery and lynchings but he’s super pissed and losing his shit over young LGBTQ kids living their lives? M’kay.
If Mike’s god stood around while 8 million Jews were killed, I don’t think he’s too worried about the gays. Stay in your lane, Mike.
And another thing to say to this…person:
Scottie's Playtime 