I recently had a somewhat uncomfortable conversation with my Dad. At 88-years old, he is understandably considering what comes next, and knowing that I’m a ‘blowhard democrat and therefore think I know everything‘, lol, he made it part of my own considerations – at least out loud. But, as we talked, I began to realize that how we look at “what comes next” truly inspires how we view this thing called life, what we value and hold dear.
When I was much younger, I had the opportunity to read Jonathan Livingston Seagull by Richard Bach. I think I’d like to read it again. It was a story that had a great impact on a young troubled life, and while I am sure I didn’t get nearly as much from the book as was offered, I still carry some of that book within my thoughts nearly 35 years later. Chief among those ringing ideas was the consideration that we are on this world to be excellent, to fly free and powerfully, to be our best selves. It is an idea that gives me hope and conviction on the same blade, for I’ve not made much of myself. What I have done, perhaps better late than never, is I’ve begun to understand what is important to me and I’ve tried to adjust my life accordingly.
During my studies of different religions, I found a great deal of beauty. It is probably shocking to some, but Muslims have a beautiful religion filled with dedication to their God, peace and humility. I recently heard a person of influence, a politician, say publicly that he “hated the Muslim religion”. I thought that was tragic. He has painted a billion people with a the same brush and feels fully justified in his self-righteous hate. His words did not influence me to hate Muslims, they only brought me sadness. Here is a man who hopes to profit by hate, and I can only imagine what those wages bring.
Over the years, I’ve come to find a lot of hope in the Christian Faith, but I don’t find myself deluded into thinking that the Bible is definitive or that the Pulpit is infallible. Clearly humans have left their mark on both, and both have gained their insecurities and foibles. Unfortunately, most religions are marked by the greedy and deluded powerful who are sure that they know what is best for everyone and damned be those who disagree. As a result, parishioners lose their search for what is beautiful and magnificent in whatever may come next. They instead follow a set of rules, a kind of club, a group identity. They have given up on God and hope only to please the pastor and Sister Bertha Betterthanyou. They have forsaken courage to seek for the safety of the flock.
Perhaps this is just what we are. How many of us are caught in this idea that by hating someone else, we are somehow doing as God would want? I would be very curious to ask them what they value, and then would I be so brave to ask how their spoken values reflect their current words. Do they value freedom, or just their own freedom? Do they value love, or only for those like them? Do they value hope, but do performative acts some man told them would get them into Heaven? Do they seek or are they comfortable in being told what to think, what to feel, what to do? Do they look for what comes next or are they seeking identity and safety in a church, a political movement, in the acceptance of someone seeking to control them?
I don’t know what I would tell Dad if he asked me again. I don’t think the answer is in religion, any religion. I do think there is something that comes next, what I would loosely if respectfully refer to as God, and if I could quote Ghandi I’d say that God is not restricted by any single religion. I want to believe that this beautiful thing called life doesn’t end. I want to believe in Love. I want to rest in Hope. I want to live a life absolutely riddled with awe at how fabulous humanity can be, rather than live a life of judgement and insecurity. And, when I regard my final days I hope I am looking forward with eager anticipation for all the wonders I will experience.
-Randy
Scottie's Playtime 
Dear BLUNDERSON,
I came to your post because it was reblogged by a Word Press friend of mine, so we know each other from two different holes in the ground — not at all, that is. But I am interested in your topic, from a very different point-of-view. I have studied your topic myself over the last number of decades from the time I was about 10 to now, some 66 years. To the possibity of having such a conversation, I would like to ask you a few questions that I feel you talked all sound, but did not address directly. You can answer them, if you so choose, publicly on your blog or privately by email.
THE QUESTIONS
1. You mentioned a number of things you valued, but you never said that you value Life in all its preciousness and beauty, human and non-human?
Is Iife for you a value, or just a state of being?
2. Having studied a number of religions, what is it about Christianity that keeps it at the top of the list?. You mentioned that religions are, in my words, other-exclusionary, locked away from other religions (or philosophies) with your fellows.
Would you rate yourself as other-exclusionary, or self-exclusionary — not trusting any religion (or philosophy) to be what you want it to be?
3. When you say life is about being the best you can be, does that mean with or without changing who you think you were born to be?
Short or one-word answers are acceptable. How much you have to say is your choice, if you choose to say anything at all.
Peace be with you.
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Hi RAWGOD. Wow, thank you for your comment, but whew! – do you ask great questions. Please let me say that this is the type of topic that, as you well know, can fill whole libraries. So, condensing my thoughts down to a few paragraphs, much less condensing my thoughts into something that makes any sense to others or even myself is … well… And, I think I’m going to rattle a bit as I try to make a sensible answer to your great questions. Sorry.
Question #1: I’ve thought of myself as a bit Buddhist regarding life. I think that all life is precious. I once heard Neal DeGrasse Tyson talking about how diamonds, gold, silver, iron – etc., are all very common in the universe, but life! Life is rare. Plant life, animal life, insect life, intelligent life – all exceedingly rare, and all worthy of respect. I’ve read about indigenous people giving thanks to a deer, for example, for the sacrifice necessary to feed the family, and I like that idea. I am not a hunter, and I recognize the hypocrisy of doing my hunting at the grocery store, but I am a meat-eater when I can afford to be. But, I am also the guy who will put the spider outside so it can catch its dinner where I am not trying to have mine — all except the wolf spider that I noticed killing earwigs in my basement. That one is my friend because I hate earwigs. I’m a bad buddhist 😦
And, in this political climate when talk of life comes up people all too often go to the abortion debate. Towards that, I see abortion as a PERHAPS necessary evil. I don’t think ANYONE supports abortion so much as recognizes the “unfairness” – for lack of a better word – of bringing a life into the world that cannot/will not be loved, nurtured, prioritized. Mother Teresa referred to people against abortion as well as unwilling to educate, feed, love, etc., the born baby is not pro-life but pro-birth and is a horrible self-righteousness from people who don’t have a ‘dollar in the game’.
Question #2: Why is Christianity at the top of my list? I am self-aware enough to admit that since I was raised in the Christian Faith, that is where I am most familiar. It is the framework by which I find my identity if only because that is the foundation of my beginning this journey. And, if we read the “red letters” of the Bible, we can see that Christianity is a beautiful doctrine, but we have found ways to destroy the beauty and simplicity to be one of control.
I’m not sure I understand your part about exclusionary, so my answer here may be way off. We as humans are born where we are born, and if that is in America one is statistically likely to be raised Christian. If one is born in India, that child is likely to be Hindu – or, in hindsight having said that, Muslim or Christian, or perhaps others, got me. And, as I said, it is culturally how we makes sense of the world. As an American Christian, who am I to say that God not only exists but exists only by my understanding of things? How arrogant is that!? I am reminded as I type about a favorite author Kevin Hearne who wrote the Iron Druid series. He writes about these beings made manifest by the energy that those who believe impart – and somewhat humorously talks about the difference between the historical Thor and the Marvel movie Thor.
There is a very old joke that talks about this man being escorted through heaven on a nickel-tour until getting to one portion where there is a large screen and he is told to tip-toe quietly for a stretch. When that portion is done and he can talk again he asks the escort what that was all about – to which the escort answers “oh, that is where the Catholic’s are. They don’t believe anyone else is here.” I’m sure the particular group changes by the telling, but I think you get my point.
Question #3: I believe I was born to be me, Randy. I came into this world spitting and crying and pooping myself, and mostly I’ve gotten better – lol. Who I am has changed over the years as I’ve matured and gain the courage to seek to understand my world and myself. It is the process of Self-Actualization and only comes when we break free of whomever it is that told us who we are and define ourselves, daily. I think that ebbs and flows a bit sort of like my diet; I know I am not supposed to buy those Oreos, and I’m surely not supposed to eat the whole dang package. More to the point, when I do cheat like that, not only do I feel guilty but very unfulfilled. I’ve done something I know isn’t good for me, isn’t right, and the return on that cheat is lacking. If I use that experience to be stronger then it is good and I improve myself, but if I become mired in unfulfilling activities then I will suffer in the morass and not go forward.
And, if I can be so arrogant to look into your question a bit, I would say that I believe in love! I don’t believe the issue is if someone loves a man or a woman, but if that person loves. I’m sure you know that there are people who have sex but do not love, and I believe that is destructive. And, I love isn’t just about sex; one can and should have love for others as well as their-self. I don’t believe that Life can exist outside of Love. I believe that what is the very best in this world only comes by love. I’m sure you’ve read the part of the Bible that talks about how love is patient, kind, humble… And, further, I think you know what I mean by saying that you can see people who do not love, are narcissistic, sociopathic or speak in hate or divisive ways seem very wrong, like something isn’t quite right about them; they are edgy, arrogant, put others on edge and are uncomfortable to be around. It’s contagious and somehow debilitating.
Dang do I rattle on. Thank you for the great questions! My goal in these “conversation starters” is to do very much that: give the permission and opportunity to people to question what I write, to force me to come to understand myself better, to give others the freedom to write their own thoughts and answers. Please let me know where I’ve made a mess of this or if you agree with parts of what I wrote.
Randy
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Hi, Randy.
One of the most interesting moments in my life was when I realized I do not have to believe in God, or gods, or any kind of superior beings. As it happens I took a completely different path than Atheism or Theism. For descriptive purposes only, I call myself a Spiritual Atheist. I do not believe there is anyone or anything “in charge” of the universe, whatever the universe may be, including the possibility of different levels of life, whatever they might be: dimensions, planes, I do not know. We do not have the words on this Earthly plane, but we will if we get there, and if they are real. But.to encapsulate all that in one sentence, “We cannot know what is there until we get there, if we get there.” (On rerrospect I see that I changed courses in the middle of a stream of words. Sorry about thay, but it is a habit of mine. Please ask for clarification if you need it.)
So, I do believe life is eternal, but1 I see nothing that suggests the existence of such things as heaven, paradise, nirvana, hell, an underworld, or ghosts and such, even though I have seen the ghost of my. Mother while I was young. A story for another time.
When I read your answers, i believe it can be said you hold yourself in judgment of some of your actions. Eating Oreos in itself is not an evil thing in my mind, not something to tear your heart over. They might not be good for your physical being, but that is a choice we make. As far as eating meat, what is the difference between eating animals or plants? When we or almost any living being eats, there is little difference between the two. We are usually killing life no matter how you look at it. I do not hunt or fish, and I do shop at grocery stores, but the only thing we can do is to eat whatwver we have. Life lives on life. Maybe that is a cop out, but it is a reality cop out. Until we discover how to survive on only non-living food, we have no choice if we want to survive.
I hope I have given you some food for thought. My studies, mostly of myself (doing reality checks) have come up with a huge amount of surmise just from looking at history, and using it to try to un ‘derstand what is in our future, if we have a future. That is not a sure thing yet. But even if we screw ourselves, some form of life will fill the gap we leave, like we filled in after the dinosaurs.
Agreement is totally unnecessary. Discussions are a way to get options. We can take them or not as we please.
Peace be with you.
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Hi RAWGOD. I like a lot of what you said. What I also like is your statements at the end: Agreement is totally unnecessary. Discussions… We can take/leave –yes, I’m too lazy to type that out 🙂 — Wouldn’t it be nice if more people believed that!!
Also, I thought about your “Spiritual Atheism”. I’m reminded of a story Scottie told me about when he was working in the ICU. There was a man there devastated by fear over what may come and desperately needed someone to pray with him. Now, Scottie has never been shy about telling people he was atheist, so it surprised me when he told me how he clasped his hands and joined that man in prayer. At the time I thought that was really hypocritical and it concerned me, but then time and thought I realized that man needed his moment with God, and he needed someone to be there with him. There are many who would pray with the man, and we hear people often talk about someone being in their thoughts and prayers, and usually they are only thinking and praying they can get away from that uncomfortable situation. But that day Scottie put that man’s needs above his own, his beliefs above his own. And, at that realization, I found that my big brother Scottie was a better Christian despite his disbelief than I and many I’ve known have been in the past with our belief. Acknowledging the precepts of a particular religion says nothing about the goodness within a heart or admittance to whatever comes next.
-Randy
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I doubt Scottie was being a Christian, but he is a good person, and is to be commended for his generosity. I probably would have done the same, under those circumstances. But, under normal circumstances, I did refuse to say grace at a meal when asked. If I had said something, it would have been to thank the spirits of all the living beings that had to die in order to provide our meal, but I decided that might ruin their meal. Silence was better than speech. I had been staying with the family for a few days while I looked for my own place. They had hired me to work in their mechanical physiotherapy business. Next day I was
fired from that position, and told to get my belongings out of their house. Christianity at its best!
I am not trying to demean those who live by religion, and I always take issue with Atheists who are still so angry at having been brought up in Christianity, as I was, that they attack Christians because of their anger. I say “Live and let live.” Mostly those same Atheists then attack me. They don’t like to be reminded everybody has to be allowed to live their own lives. We make our choices, why not let others make their own choices. But such is humanity. We seem to be happiest when making others feel miserable.
Peace be with you.
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