being my final post for Halloween 2025. π π«₯
I remember the 80s: my gay and trans friends threw the very most fun parties while keeping everyone safe, played the best dance music, and had the very best costumes!
βWhat do you mean youβre a transgender mouse?β
By Samantha Allen, Quispe LΓ³pez, Fran Tirado, Ludwig Hurtado, and Ana Osorno
Are you really gay if straight people can recognize your Halloween costume? The real indicator of someoneβs sexual orientation is whether they go to a party as something recognizable β or whether they go as Chappell Roan in the crowd at Governors Ball. Why would you go as a sexy cat when you could be a transgender mouse β or a reference to an obscure arthouse movie only you and your mutuals have seen?
In all seriousness, I am a little torn on the practice of wearing incredibly obscure gay Halloween costumes: maybe there are better ways to communicate your niche interests than forcing everyone at the function to ask β…and what are you again?β But on the other hand, who does it really hurt when your friends dress up like George Santosβ alleged drag persona Kitara Ravache and the fishing rod with legs from Toy Story? Sure, maybe it turns all of us into the Spider-Man pointing at Spider-Man meme when we recognize each otherβs fits, but itβs fine! We only get so many Halloweens in our lives, we might as well take some big swings!
Indeed, in the end, there is a certain beauty in our communityβs intense love of obscure pop cultural moments and artifacts. So why not use the yearβs spookiest holiday as an excuse to get hyperspecific? Forget witches and ghosts: find the deepest rabbit hole you know and leap to the bottom of it! And if youβre wanting for inspiration, we here at Them have curated a bevy of ideas, ranging from Barack Obamaβs nonbinary friend to the concept of twink death. Enjoy all the confused looks on your way to the party. β Samantha Allen
Mice, Ranked From Least to Most Transgender
No matter gay straight or bi, lesbian, transgender mice.
As we established here at Them dot us, after Trumpβs deranged claim about βtransgender mice,β mice are indeed pretty damn transgender. If you want to be silly and gay, there luckily is an abundance of trans-coded mice to choose from. Some of our favorites include Pinky and the Brain from Animaniacs, labor union darling Scabby the Rat, and of course Remy from Ratatouille. β Quispe LΓ³pez
Get a jump start on Thanksgiving with this horrible pull from the TV archives. Put on a red dress, a brunette wig, and if anyone wonders who you are, just raise a finger to the sky and sing βItβs turkey lurkey time.β Confused expressions? Thatβs part of the experience. β Samantha Allen
Ava from Hacks on the escalator
(Snip; there is so much more it’d make a huge post; it’s fabulous, so have another cup, click through, and enjoy!)
(Click “Read on Substack”, enjoy! It’s less than 1 minute.)
Has anyone seen Steve???
– In Otter News Read on Substack
Bestselling author Jodi Picoult pushes back after her musical is canceled by Indiana high school
ByΒ Β MARK KENNEDY
NEW YORK (AP) β Author Jodi Picoult has the dubious honor of being banned in two mediums this fall β her books and now a musical based on her novel βBetween the Lines.β
βIβm pretty sure Iβm the first author who has now had censorship occur in two different types of media,β Picoult says. βHonestly, Iβm not out here to be salacious. I am writing the world as it is, and I am honestly just trying to write about difficult issues that people have a hard time talking about because that is what fiction and the arts do.β
The superintendent of Mississinewa High School in Gas City, Indiana, canceled a production last week of βBetween the Lines,β saying concerns were raised over βsexual innuendoβ and alcohol references in the musical. Jeremy Fewell, the superintendent, did not respond to a request for comment.
βItβs devastating for us to know that these kids who put in hundreds of hours of hard work had that torn away from them because of the objections of a single parent,β says Picoult.
βWhat I know, perhaps better than most people, as someone whose books have been banned, is when one parent starts deciding what is appropriate and what is inappropriate for the children of other parents, we have a big problem.β
Picoult noted that the same Indiana high school has previously produced βGrease,β where the sexual innuendo and alcohol abuse is much greater, including a pregnancy scare, sex-mad teens and the line βDid she put up a fight?β
βBetween the Linesβ centers on Delilah, an outsider in a new high school, who finds solace in a book and realizes she has the power to write her own story and narrate her own life. βIt is a very benign message. And itβs actually a really important one for adolescents today,β says Picoult.
The original work, which features a nonbinary character, had already been edited with licensed changes to make it more palatable for a conservative audience, including removing any reference to the nonbinary characterβs gender orientation.
The production was scheduled for Halloween weekend at the Gas City Performing Arts Center. The show has music and lyrics by Elyssa Samsel and Kate Anderson, and a story by Timothy Allen McDonald, based on the 2012 novel by Picoult and her daughter, Samantha van Leer. It played off-Broadway in 2022.
Picoult, the bestselling author of βMy Sisterβs Keeperβ and βSmall Great Things,β has also written about the moments leading up to a school shooting in βNineteen Minutes,β which was banned 16 times in the 2024-2025 school year, according to PEN America, making her the nationβs fourth most-banned author.
βI had 20 books banned in one school district in Florida alone because of a single parentβs objection and she admitted she had not read any of the books,β said Picoult, a PEN America trustee. βShe said that they were banned for βmature content and sexuality.β There were books of mine that did not even have a single kiss in them.β
The uptick in book banning has spread to stages as well. The Dramatists Legal Defense Fund has documented recently challenged plays and musicals from states including Pennsylvania, Florida, Indiana, Kansas, Ohio and New Jersey after parents or teachers complained that the worksβ social themes werenβt appropriate for minors.
The Northern Lebanon High School, in Fredericksburg, Pennsylvania, canceled a 2024 production of βThe Addams Family,β citing concerns over scenes with violence, children smoking and subtle queer themes. Paula Vogelβs play βIndecent,β which explores a flashpoint in Jewish and queer theatrical history, was abruptly canceled in Floridaβs Duval County in 2023 for βinappropriateβ sexual dialogue.
Last year, the Educational Theatre Association asked more than 1,800 theatre educators in public and private schools across the U.S. about censorship. More than 75% of respondents reported pressure to reconsider their play and musical choices during the 2023-24 school year.
βWe are not protecting kids,β said Picoult. βWe are robbing them of materials that we use to deal with an increasingly complex world.β
Because it only takes a moment to think.
Stroke day by Clay Jones
How it happened Read on Substack
I visited Southern California last June. I got to hang out with friends. I ate fish tacos and sushi. I went to the beach, and I got to walk on the Oceanside boardwalk. I saw pelicans and sea lions. I had a great time. You might remember this. But near the end of this trip, I started to suffer from some shoulder pain. I thought it was just a pinched nerve, probably from sleeping on a teenage girlβs bed. No, she was not in the bed at the same time. She was in Ireland. The pain lasted for a few days, but vanished after I had gotten back to Virginia.
I had a pretty good summer. I went to the National Cartoonist Society’s convention in Boston for just an afternoon. I visited New York City for a few days, and I saw my good friend Alexandra. I went to the annual convention of the Association of American Editorial Cartoonists outside of Washington, DC, and I won the Rex Babin Award for Excellence in Local Cartooning. It may have been the best time I’ve ever had at one of our conventions.
Next on my agenda was a trip to Europe. I was going to visit Berlin, then fly to Sweden, then take a train and visit Copenhagen, then Hamburg, and then Amsterdam, where I was going to visit the Van Gogh Museum. I was going to spend a night in Brussels, then spend a few extra days in Paris, and see the Louvre. I was going to wrap up my trip by revisiting old friends in London and Dublin. And a week before this European trip, my shoulder started to hurt again.
I thought the pinched nerve had come back. On Monday, October 6, the pain came back with a vengeance. The shoulder pain from June was no comparison to the pain I had two weeks ago. While the pain was brutal, it didn’t stop me from getting down on my hands and knees and cleaning my toilet because my Landlady and a plumber were coming to my apartment the next day. By Thursday, with my European trip just four days away, I thought there was no way I could go jet-setting with this sort of pain. I was still thinking about Europe that morning, but by that afternoon, I was thinking about the hospital.
The pain was at its worst on Thursday. I took some aspirin in the morning, and a couple of hours later, I took some ibuprofen. I worked on the dayβs cartoon, not knowing it would be my last for a while. But a point came where I just had to lie down, even before my cartoon was done. I lay down for a short while, and when I got up, I noticed I was a little lightheaded. When I walked to the bathroom, my hands were along the walls so I wouldn’t fall. I finished my cartoon and realized that I was having a hard time putting the Apple Pencil where I wanted it to go. It was about this time that I started to think about the hospital.
I was in the mode of thinking that the hospital was kind of silly. I Googled about my shoulder pain, and I saw that it could be a symptom of a stroke. I thought, βNot on the right side, right?β Yes, even on the right side.
I decided to eat something first because I didn’t know when I would get a chance to eat again. I started to make some Chef Boyardee, which I don’t like at all, but I just needed to get something in my system. And I realized then that my right leg wasn’t really working. I could stand and I could walk, but I was kind of dragging my leg. A few hours later at the hospital, my entire right side pretty much collapsed.
I have a lot of friends here in Fredericksburg, but I thought of who would get me to the hospital the quickest. I thought about who would come running right away. Who would come running when I cried? I thought Melisa Casacuberta would be the quickest. I sent Melisa a message, simply asking if she could do me a favor and take me to the emergency room. I didn’t tell her why. She was at my house within 10 minutes. First, I had to navigate my stairs, which I did while having both hands on the handrails. I live above a restaurant, and as I stood outside waiting for Melissa, I leaned against a pillar, pretending to be Joe Cool as customers walked past me.
I live close to the hospital, so it didn’t take long to get there. I packed my iPhone, MacBook, and iPad (I was thinking I could still draw some cartoons) with me in my backpack. The security guard at the hospital made me walk through security three times because something in my backpack kept making the metal detector go off. Never mind, I was having a stroke. I didn’t sit and wait in the waiting room as the staff saw me immediately. Within minutes, I was in an MRI.
Yup. I had a stroke.
As you probably already know, I am now at the rehab center. Each day is filled with physical therapy as well as what you might call mental therapy. When I’m not in therapy, and I’m lying in my bed, I am working on some of my therapy. Today was Sunday, and I was supposed to have it off from therapy, but one of the trainers, one I had never worked with before, came in and asked if I wanted a workout anyway. She said she had some time and asked some of the other trainers who she could work with, and she was told I was pretty much good to go. She kicked my ass.
It bothers me that yesterday was No Kings Day, and I didn’t get to do anything with it. Several of my friends, even a few who visited me here, like Melissa Colombo, participated. I have cartoon ideas every day, and it kills me that I’m not drawing them. I wonder if there are any cartoonists out there who would actually want to use my ideas? Not that I would give them to them.
I think from this point that I should start blogging about news instead of just about myself. I don’t want to be a broken record. I am already a broken human. That doesn’t mean I’m not going to write about the stroke anymore, but I need to start writing about the attack the fascists on this country. I have time to think of the columns when the nurses forget I’m in the bathroom. Yes, they do that.
The columns are still hard to write as I am doing them by dictating into the MacBook microphone and typing with one finger. If you see any mistakes or boogers, you’re just gonna have to live with them, like boogers. That was a boo-boo.
I’ll leave you with something funny I’ll leave you with something funny.
One of my trainers is very serious. I have yet to hear him laugh. He is a nice guy, and he’s not strict. I just don’t think he laughs.
Yesterday. I was in a session, and I was walking in the gym. This requires a lot of concentration while I am walking. The trainer is right in front of me, and usually, there’s another trainer right behind me with the wheelchair ready for me to fall into it.
There are usually several trainers and patients in the gym at the same time. I could hear one trainer talking to his patient while we were walking, and he asked the patient what his favorite food was. The patient said his favorite food was baloney sandwiches. I looked at my trainer while I was walking and said, βBaloney sandwiches? Bleah!β I finally made my trainer laugh.
This is Melissa Colombo. She has been a godsend. She has checked my apartment, briefed my insistent Roomba, brought me clothes so I would not walk around here with my ass hanging out, checked my mail, taken out my garbage, thrown spoiled food out of my fridge, visited me in rehab, and has even done some of my laundry.
That dog hasn’t done shit. (snip)
I think I remember an ABC Movie of the Week back in the 70s, about something like this. I’m not rooting for bad acts, and this is a bad act. But what an entertaining story: man, oh, man!
PARIS (AP) β In a minutes-long strike Sunday inside the worldβs most-visited museum, thieves rode a basket lift to the Louvre, forced a window into the Galerie dβApollon β while tourists pressed shoulder-to-shoulder in the corridors β smashed display cases and fled with priceless Napoleonic jewels, officials said.
It was among the highest-profile museum thefts in recent memory and comes as Louvre employees have complained of worker and security understaffing.
One object was later found outside the museum, according to Culture Minister Rachida Dati. French daily Le Parisien reported it was the emerald-studded crown of Napoleon IIIβs wife Empress EugΓ©nie β gold, diamonds and sculpted eagles β recovered just beyond the walls, broken.
The theft unfolded just 250 meters (270 yards) from the Mona Lisa, in what Dati described as βa four-minute operation.β No one was hurt.
Images from the scene showed confused tourists being steered out of the glass pyramid and adjoining courtyards as officers closed nearby streets along the Seine.
Also visible was a lift braced to the Seine-facing facade near a construction zone β an extraordinary vulnerability at a palace-museum.
Around 9:30 a.m., several intruders forced a window, cut panes with a disc cutter and went straight for the vitrines, officials said. Interior Minister Laurent NuΓ±ez said the crew entered from outside using a basket lift.
The choice of target compounded the shock. The vaulted Galerie dβApollon in the Denon wing, capped by a ceiling painted for Louis XIV, displays a selection of the French Crown Jewels. The thieves are believed to have approached via the riverfront facade, where construction is underway, used a freight elevator to reach the hall, took nine pieces from a 23-item collection linked to Napoleon and the Empress, and made off on motorbikes, according to Le Parisien.
Daylight robberies during public hours are rare. Pulling one off inside the Louvre β with visitors present β ranks among Europeβs most audacious since Dresdenβs Green Vault museum in 2019, and the most serious in France in more than a decade.
It also collides with a deeper tension the Louvre has struggled to resolve: swelling crowds and stretched staff. The museum delayed opening during a June staff walkout over overcrowding and chronic understaffing. Unions say mass tourism leaves too few eyes on too many rooms and creates pressure points where construction zones, freight routes and visitor flows meet.
Security around marquee works remains tight β the Mona Lisa is behind bulletproof glass in a bespoke, climate-controlled case.
Itβs unclear whether staffing levels played any role in Sundayβs breach.
The Louvre has a long history of thefts and attempted robberies. The most famous came in 1911, when the Mona Lisa vanished from its frame, stolen by Vincenzo Peruggia and recovered two years later in Florence.
Today the former royal palace holds a roll call of civilization: Leonardoβs Mona Lisa; the armless serenity of the Venus de Milo; the Winged Victory of Samothrace, wind-lashed on the Daru staircase; the Code of Hammurabiβs carved laws; Delacroixβs Liberty Leading the People; GΓ©ricaultβs The Raft of the Medusa. More than 33,000 works β from Mesopotamia, Egypt and the classical world to Europeβs masters β draw a daily tide of up to 30,000 visitors even as investigators now begin to sweep those gilded corridors for clues.
The heist spilled instantly into politics. Far-right leader Jordan Bardella used it to attack President Emmanuel Macron, weakened at home and facing a fractured parliament.
βThe Louvre is a global symbol of our culture,β Bardella wrote on X. βThis robbery, which allowed thieves to steal jewels from the French Crown, is an unbearable humiliation for our country. How far will the decay of the state go?β
The criticism lands as Macron touts a decade-long βLouvre New Renaissanceβ plan β about β¬700 million to modernize infrastructure, ease crowding and give the Mona Lisa a dedicated gallery by 2031. For workers on the floor, the relief has felt slower than the pressure.
Forensic teams are examining the site of the crime and adjoining access points while a full inventory is taken, authorities said. Officials have described the haul as of βinestimableβ historical value.
Recovery may prove difficult. βItβs unlikely these jewels will ever be seen again,β said Tobias Kormind, managing director of 77 Diamonds. βProfessional crews often break down and re-cut large, recognizable stones to evade detection, effectively erasing their provenance.β
The Louvre closed for the rest of Sunday as police sealed gates, cleared courtyards and shut nearby streets along the Seine.
Key questions still unanswered are how many people took part in the theft and whether they had inside assistance, authorities said. According to French media, there were four perpetrators: two dressed as construction workers in yellow safety vests on the lift, and two each on a scooter.
Investigators are reviewing CCTV from the Denon wing and the riverfront, inspecting the basket lift used to reach the gallery and interviewing staff who were on site when the museum opened, authorities said.
___
Associated Press writer Jill Lawless in London contributed to this report.
Stroke Updates by Clay Jones
So how am I doing? Read on Substack
I recently transferred to the rehab center, which is just across the street from the hospital. Today I took a cognitive test, I took a speech pattern test, and I took a physical test. Every day from here on out, I will be taking a physical test, which we call PT. They usually wanna work people till they wanna quit, but they haven’t had that problem with me yet, not because I’m super amazing or awesome, but because I really want to beat this shit as quickly as I can.
My friend Melissa Colombo came by and brought me some clothes. Nobody can go on Facebook and ask people to bring them shorts, T-shirts, and underwear while they’re in a rehab center, but I can. Hell, I once got people to send me self-addressed stamped envelopes for messed-up business cards. But I sent out a request on Facebook for someone to bring me some shorts and T-shirts to the rehab center. All I had this morning was just a road in the hospital, and my ass was hanging out.
A few people offered to ship me stuff, but that wasn’t the issue. I have money. I could easily order something. But I need something now because, let me put that again, my ass was hanging out. So my friend Melissa brought me some clothes. Funny thing is, someone else went ahead and quickly ordered me some stuff, and that was Leslie Elliott.
I want to thank Melissa and Leslie for literally saving my ass.
The next 10 days are going to be more PT. I am expected to be in this place for at least 10 days. After that, I’m expected to go home. The thing is, I live in a second-level apartment, and I want to be able to walk into my apartment and take care of myself again. Unfortunately, I’m nowhere close to that yet. Walking, taking steps, things are extremely difficult right now, and even grabbing things is impossible, but I am further today than I was yesterday.
If you have donated to me either by becoming a paid subscriber to my Substack, or donated through PayPal, or donated through Venmo, or donated through Zelle, and I have not sent you a message, please accept my apologies. I want to thank everybody who has supported me through this. The outpouring of support has blown me away. In fact, it’s blown away the entire cartooning community. We are all very impressed and overwhelmed by your support, especially me. I just wanna say thank you. I’m never going to stop saying thank you.
And on that note, I was just visited by a former photographer from the Free Lance-Star, Suzanne Carr Rossi. She brought me pants.
And now the Facebook updates from the past few days.
Today, October 16, 2025
Remember when Donald Trump took that cognitive test and bragged about it? Remember that he had to repeat βperson, woman, man, camera, TVβ. Trump said. βThey said nobody gets it in order, itβs actually not that easy. But for me it was easy. And thatβs not an easy question.β He is right.
Itβs not an easy question when you have to answer five minutes later.
Itβs not easy when the question is βbridge, Sarah, justice, banana.β Itβs not easy when you have to remember photos that include car keys, a comb, and a helicopter five minutes later.
Itβs not easy when you have to remember letters and numbers in the sequence of 1, A, 2, B, 3, C, 4, D, etc, to ten.
Itβs not easy to count backwards from 20.
Itβs not easy to have to draw a clock and other shapes with your left hand when youβre handed and your right hand is kind of dead from a stroke.
Itβs not easy to do any of the stuff after having a stroke, but I did it. The thing is, nobody told me I was great or amazing for it. Sicophants didnβt fawn over me for it. Nobody threw a parade for me because I remembered five words. Idiots didnβt go until late-night TV to tell me I was a genius for it.
Donald Trump wants you to treat him like a baby for remembering five words.
Donald Trump never suffered from a stroke.
So why was Donald Trump given this cognitive test?
Who knew that my stroke would become part of my research?
October 16, 2025
Ok, Peezeheads!!! Who wants to volunteer to help out a stroke victim, and possibly an opportunity to see my assοΏΌ?
I am at Encompass in Fredericksburg. I need someone to bring me a few button-up shirts. I canβt use a T-shirt because my shoulder is messed up from the stroke. I also need a pair of shorts. I just need athletic shorts, nothing with buttons or belts, or zippers. οΏΌ
I could also use some underwear.
At this time, I am still wearing the gown from the hospital, and my ass is hanging out. Fortunately, the entire nursing staff has told me that my butt is not too hairy, but maybe theyβre just being nice. οΏΌ
Update: I am only asking local people to help. I need this stuff today, not delivered by Amazon. Thank you.
Update update: οΏΌMelissa Colombo to the rescue, and then Leslie Elliott, and my friend Suzanne.
October 15, 2025
So many people have touched me this week, and Iβll never be able to you how much it means to me.
As I was being rolled out on a gurney to be taken to the rehab center, an old friend I hadnβt seen in nearly a decade was waiting outside my hospital room to see me.
I want to cry. I love you, Rhonda.
October 15, 2025
I had an MRI this morning after the procedure scan my heart. They were looking to see if there was a hole or any other abnormalities in my heart that may have caused the stroke. As it turns out, thereβs nothing wrong with it.
But the MRI was brutal. You canβt move, your back hurts, you donβt know when itβs going to end, you are continuously being asked to hold your breath, and theyβre playing 90s music made by other people. Instead of Pearl Jam, youβre getting Pearl lameοΏΌ.
Itβs time to go. They want more blood.
October 15, 2025
I am being moved tonight to a rehab facility. I think this is good news. οΏΌ
October 15, 2025
One of my nurses was training another nurse this morning. Just as the trainee was applying alcohol to my skin, in order for me to inject myself with insulin (yes they are making me inject myself), I decided let out a little scream. AAAAAGH! The trainee jumped, and the other nurse laughed her ass off, and said that was great.
οΏΌThey both said that theyβre going to remember me.
Damn straight.
This is the GoFundMe set up by Kevin Necessary and Jack Ohman
This is a cartoon drawn by John Buss.
How to draw Peezy by Dave Whammond, and he’s trying to get more cartoonists to join in. I hope it happens because I would love to see more of my colleaguesβ renditions of our favorite pizza.
(snork!! -A.)
Johnson announces campaign to get Trump a Nobel Peace prize by Ann Telnaes
The Speaker continues to display his fealty Read on Substack
The Speaker of the House will lead the effort to convince international parliaments and presidents to nominate Trump.
Scottie's Playtime 