and this is why. MUTTS struck me today, because I feel exhausted and wish to hibernate. All’s well; some days are just like that, you know? 🥱 🙂
(This is nice; it’s the rest of the MUTTS email.)
“If I were given the opportunity to present a gift to the next generation, it would be the ability for each individual to learn to laugh at himself.”
Charles M. Schulz
No politics, all funny!
It’s pretty funny!
A little tougher than much of what I usually post, though I always enjoy Evan Hurst’s work personally, and highly recommend everyone to do so, as well. Anyway, this is share worthy.
Evan Hurst Dec 19, 2025
I had a whole other thing to finish writing for y’all this week, a Christmas/holiday post about the kinds of awful conservative Christians whose faith is based on God building a wall around heaven to keep out those they view as irredeemable sinners — you know, LGBTQ+ people, women who think freely, people who aren’t Nazis. I’ll finish writing it next week, or something.
But right now I am too busy laughing at this story Rupert Murdoch’s Wall Street Journal published and promoted on its socials this week:
I did not know what I wanted for Christmas — you know, besides for every ICE agent in the country to stub their toe — but now I know that what my heart desires most is to witness a Religious Right meltdown over RUPERT MURDOCH’S WALL STREET JOURNAL publishing the story of “Chad, Brad and Thad couldn’t figure out how to make Chad’s mid-century modern go with Thad’s medieval sex swing and Brad’s collection of giant English settees. But they did it, and it’s FABULOUS.”
And praise Jesus, for Santa has brought it to me!
Y’all, sometimes the Moral High Ground is a very serious newsletter about serious subjects. Other times it is just about laughing at these motherfuckers and their small, sad brains and fears and prejudices and general status as the planet’s biggest losers. On December 19, 2025, as we head into the heaviest part of the holiday week, the Moral High Ground is the second thing.
The article is super fun, if you like real estate/interior design features, especially ones that are super-gay. Chad, Brad and Thad are actually David Gobberdiel, Ryan Tungate, and Michael Cowell, and they have a fabulous 4,000-square-foot duplex in Northalsted in Chicago. The Wall Street Journal helpfully explains terms for its readers who might not know:
The throuple, which is a committed romantic or sexual relationship between three people, took things slow at first.
David and Ryan didn’t live with Michael at first. (They were the original couple, as is often the case with throuples, two become three.) But then blah blah blah pandemic Michael didn’t leave, etc.
But $1.71 million later, they had a house, all three of ‘em!
The end result really is gorgeous, and despite how the WSJ helpfully explains certain things for people, it treats all of it is completely jejune, which is AS IT SHOULD BE. If Chad, Brad and Thad are happy, who the fuck should care?
For instance:
Real-estate agents are noticing more throuples and polycules buying homes together, often with everyone’s name on the deed. “Monogamy in this economy?” says Kathy “Kiki” Sloan, an employing broker with Property Dominator in Denver.
A polycule is bigger than a throuple, it’s more like a rhombus on top of a Venn diagram on top of a buncha wingdings. See? I am helpful like the Wall Street Journal, which explains it like this:
Designers are taking note, creating homes that balance privacy and togetherness for throuples and polycules, a group of people involved in consensual, interconnected, non-monogamous relationships.
Just as I said.
Anyway, the WSJ explains how Dane, Blaine and Shane spent $405,000 — must be nice, guys — to interior design their place up all-fancy-like and in a way that incorporated all their styles. “Designing for a couple is tricky enough. Add a third partner, and it is like a high-stakes game of design Tetris.” Did WSJ have to go with that exact visual? Oh hell yeah they did, and I recommend them for a Pulitzer, or at the very least a FIFA Pulitzer.
Also they have a 96” x 96” mattress. For all the Tetris.
So as I was saying, the article is great, but what I really wanted to see was the religious right meltdown. While there’s not much yet in the way of organized hate groups or right-wing podcasters bitching, there’s some good clean fun from Twitter, like this weenus who writes for the right-wing Western Journal, who provided the headline for today’s newsletter:
Hahahahahahahahahahahaha, I am so happy right now.
That tweet has one reply, which simply says:
AT@j2tiger
@Josh_Manning@WSJ Three people can’t sodomize each other simultaneously. Someone’s gotta be at the end of the train. Learn math.
4:43 PM · Dec 18, 2025
LEARN MATH.
I am dying laughing.
Queerty found some loser on Facebook whining that “Why do publications like the WSJ prominently run stories about fringe subjects?” and “How many of your readers actually have a problem with their design tastes conflicting in their ‘throuple’?” As we are always discussing here, the Main Character Syndrome of these assholes is immense, the way they think their totally boring lives should be the center of attention in every story.
They found another who bellyached, “Everybody understands that this post is about promoting the far-left agenda, not about design tastes, right?” And here they thought Trump had made that illegal!
And it just gets more fun from there.
Oh no, not a rebuke!
Poor Jordan also whined in the comments that “It is shameful to normalize and celebrate what is degeneracy in the eyes of God. You should repent.” Boo hoo.
Now meet “Butthurt,” who is, well, butthurt:
Sorry, “Butthurt,” but there’s just not as much demand in the interior design journalism space for full-length features on Southern Baptist Becky who found the cutest “As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD” wallpaper to go with their “Bless this mess!” dish towels.
Oh, the fundamentalists and Nazis of Twitter are losing it.
“It’s way past pride month for this crap,” whined “Grover Dill.” So … he wouldn’t bitch had they published this in June? Please advise.
This person writes about with about as much fluency as the president:
Catronwalk@catalewalk
@WSJ a “throuple”!!!?! This is “immorality” “blasphemy” personified as stated in scripture! Trash. Makes you feel magnanimous WSJ!?!?!?
1:54 PM · Dec 17, 2025
4 Likes
MAKES YOU FEEL MAGNANIMOUS WSJ!?!?!?
(By the way, not gonna go down a theological rabbithole here, but there is no Bible verse that says throuples are bad. In fact — IN FUCKING FACT — the Bible is absolutely full of polygamous arrangements. It’s just that most of them involve men having multiple wives and concubines. I’d argue that today’s throuples and polycules are far more nurturing, loving and egalitarian. Of course, the religious right hates things that are nurturing, loving and egalitarian.)
This jerkoff either asked AI or a thesaurus to write their comment:
A flagship paper treating interior design friction by a socially marginal polyamorous throuple ‘feature-worthy’ reveals metastatic cultural rot, and an abdication of moral and editorial restraint.
Forsooth and herewith!
This person is very upset because WHAT ABOUT TRADITIONAL-HETEROSEXUAL-PENIS-IN-VAGINA-THROUPLINGS?
Leonardo Danger@300aacblackout
@WSJ Now do a feel-good story about two women and one guy. Oh wait, you would never do that because gay is best.
4:30 PM · Dec 17, 2025
1 Like
Would Leonardo cry so much if WSJ had written an article about a white fundamentalist Christian man with a bunch of underage sister-wives? Just curious.
Finally, this guy is just repulsed, I tell you, repulsed, with British spellings!
John DiCarlo@JohnDicarlo20
@WSJ This article is a new low for the WSJ. Promoting deviant sexual behaviour. Welcome to the bottom of the slippery slope. I am repulsed, and I can see why you turned off the comments on your digital paper. I am disgusted.
1:17 PM · Dec 17, 2025
8 Likes
Oh, bless their hearts.
What’s fun about this is that these people are genuinely upset, and they think they’re upset about something that matters. They think there’s a God in the sky who actually is as small-minded as they are, a God who would truly be upset about Kevin, Devin and Tevin living in whatever kind of joyful matrimony they all choose to as consenting adults.
As usual, these people are creating God in their own tiny, hateful loser image, and you can tell, because of how God has all the same fears and insecurities they have.
Let’s not forget jealousy either.
Because again, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob’s house is faaaaabulous.
Ain’t ONE heterosexually-yoked fundamentalist Christian couple on earth whose tacky-ass McMansion in the suburbs looks that good.
And they know it.
What if these guys are also happier than every heterosexually-yoked fundamentalist Christian couple on earth?
Oh fuuuuuuuck.
Hope all your weeks are merry merry, whatever you are or are not celebrating at the moment!
…
Bluesky? I’m there! Insta! I’m there too! You can even follow me on the old Facebook.
…
Thank you, love you all!
-Evan
He’s fully mastered puff pastry!
Fancy Fixins: Hillbilly Makes Cream Horns
Photographer Janette Beckman and curator Julie Grahame have organized a one-time fundraiser for the ACLU that showcases images of musicians who have recorded protest songs or are known for their activism. Forty-three photographers have donated images of 50 artists, from John Lennon to Nina Simone to Bad Bunny, and 100% of the profits will go towards the ACLU and their efforts to protect equality, freedom and rights. In addition to the images there is a playlist of songs for the fundraiser.Bob Marley, who performed at Crystal Palace Bowl in 1980, is known for songs such as Get Up, Stand Up, War, Redemption Song and Concrete Jungle that advocate for social issues, human rights and resistance. Photograph: David Corio
Curated by Briana Ellis-Gibbs
(I posted a few here; go see the whole piece with all the photos. It’s motivating! A.)
Songs such as American Skin (41 Shots), The Ghost of Tom Joad and Born in the USA highlight systemic injustice, racism and the struggles of working-class people and immigrantsPhotograph: Danny Clinch, Transparent Clinch Gallery
=====
She is known for songs like Anxiety that advocate for mental health awareness and has used awards show speeches to speak out against government overreach and oppression. Photograph: Sacha Lecca
=====
One of Simone’s most prominent songs, Mississippi Goddam, was a direct response to systemic racial inequality in the US exemplified in the handling of the 1963 16th Street Baptist Church bombing and Medgar Evers’s murder. The song became an anthem for the civil rights movement. Photograph: Michael Putland
=====
Her songs, including A Woman’s Right and Coat of Many Colors, have addressed social issues, and she has been outspoken and financially generous as a philanthropist. Photograph: Clay Patrick McBride
(snip-Go See The Rest!)
Jenny Lawson (thebloggess) Dec 09, 2025
Hello, friend!
I’m a little late on this because yesterday I opened up the James Garfield Miracle and so I’ve been giving out free stuffed animals to people who need them. It’s a weird, long story but basically an ancient taxidermied boar inspired a holiday giveaway for kids by strangers to strangers 16 years ago and we just kept doing it each year. It’s on the blog right now if you need help or want to help. Over 275 kids have been sent new plushies in the last 18 hours.
I’m giving out 150 myself and that’s funded by in part by you here in my substack and by the 2026 calendar I made with this years drawings so if you are reading here then you have already helped with this years James Garfield Miracle and I love you. I may not ever get to hug you all in person but I hope you can feel this:
I still have more stuffed animals to give out because people keep beating me to filling the wishlists and HOW AMAZING IS THAT?
There was even a person who once was a recipient as a child years ago and is now filling wishlists for others.
(Below was supposed to be another happy, sniffly image but my computer was apparently uncomfortable with my emotions and offered me this instead and it made me laugh so now you have to see it.)
Aaaanyway, I have to get back to it, but first, the drawing for this week is one I started long ago and just finished because somehow it feels really fitting.
“Together we rise, we soar, we touch the stars. We cannot quit. Together.”
I feel so lucky today.
I super crazy love you.
~ me
From SBTB, some NSFW language within. Like, I don’t even know what having a dump-truck tushie means. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
“Heated Rivalry: The Unbearable Lightness of Having a Dump-Truck Ass“
by Candy
So right now I have a number of non-romance community friends coming up to me and saying stuff like:
“Oh hey sounds like some hockey fic finally made it onto TV, huh?”
“Yo Candy have you heard of the gay hockey romance TV show?”
“How excited are you about the gay hockey smut on TV?”
“Candy why is your entire Tumblr dashboard filled with naked asses?”
To which I say: excuse me, these are not just “naked asses.”
These are triple-platinum certified, AAA grade dumptrucks. Can dumptruck butts even be certified platinum, Sisqo hit notwithstanding?
Fuck you, they can now. These asses can do anything. These asses can fly you to the fucking moon. These asses were sculpted by the hand of God, after which God cut their own hand off because it had achieved perfection, so why sculpt anything else ever. Connor Storrie’s ass in particular is a mesmerizingly perfect hemisphere. He could never sneak into an enemy base because he is dummy thicc and the thunderclap of those asscheeks would absolutely alert the guards for miles around. Do you understand what I’m saying?
A | BN | K | ABBut the thing is, you need to watch the show — I can’t believe I’m saying this after what I’ve just said above — not for the asses, but because the actors are a delight to watch. It’s not that they’re beautiful, or at least, not only because of that.
It’s because they inhabit their characters to a degree that is frankly eerie.
Like: the way Connor Storrie holds his body as Ilya Rozanov in every scene. Man doesn’t stand like an American, though he very much is. (Storrie is a Texan. A Texan.) And what does “doesn’t stand like an American” even mean? Look, I can’t fuckin’ explain it, OK, but white American dudes tend to hold themselves A Way, and he doesn’t do it. It’s like porn (which this show delivers on, by the way). I just know it when I see it.
That’s not even going into Storrie’s near-impeccable Russian (which he apparently acquired over three weeks), or the things he’s able to do with his eyes, or the curl of an upper lip, or a flick of his eyebrow.
What, you think there wouldn’t be gifs? Come on now.
And then there’s Hudson Williams as Shane Hollander. Shane, the lawful good muppet to Ilya’s chaos gremlin freak. Williams nails every microexpression, especially in the scenes in which he’s texting Ilya: vulnerability, frustration, reluctant amusement, endearment—they all flicker across his face. He’s stiff and awkward, which you might initially mistake for bad acting, except no, that’s Shane: Shane is an awkward motherfucker! Shane Hollander has zero grace until you strap skates on him, or until he’s confronted by Ilya Rozanov’s dick.
Sure, sure, my friends say. Watch it for the acting. That’s what you say. That’s not what you’re reblogging on Tumblr, you thirsty bitch.
I mean, yeah. I’m mostly posting gifsets of dumptruck butts because I need everyone I know to watch this show, and while I honestly find this image of Ilya giving Shane the once-over when they first meet theee actual hottest thing, who the fuck cares about that who hasn’t seen the show already?
It’s pretty hot
That’s not going to grab people’s attention. Oh, look at this attractive white dude giving someone the ole bedroom eyes. Boh-ring. NEXT.
Ilya Rozanov, naked and glistening with water, jorkin’ it in the locker room showers while maintaining hideously uncomfortable eye contact with Shane? That’s an attention-grabber. And I’ve sold three different people into watching this show because of it.
Speaking for all of us…
So anyway, I’ve had to talk to several friends about this show, and about why I, a person who has worked hard all their life to achieve the perfect body (potato-shaped) care about sports romance, and I’ve come up with this Heated Rivalry explainer of sorts. Maybe you’ll find this helpful as you navigate conversations with other people in your life who are like, hey, I hear you like smut! What do you think of that smutty hockey show? Or, like, if you haven’t checked out either the book or the show, and somehow have avoided learning anything about either of them, maybe this will finally push you over the edge? In fact, I hope it does. Consider this me kicking you down a well lined with bare chests and fake team logos of dubious quality and screaming This! Is! Heated Rivalry!
It’s not a fic, it’s a hockey romance novel by Rachel Reid. The two main characters are Ilya Rozanov, Russian hockey wunderkind, and Shane Hollander, Canadian hockey wunderkind. (And yeah, Shane bears a physical resemblance to Sid Crosby, and Ilya being Russian and playing for a rival team immediately raises the spectre of Alexander Ovechkin, but as far as I know, this isn’t scrubbed Sid/Ovi fic, even if, uh, the inspiration seems pretty clear.)
Shane and Ilya meet rookie year, find each other infuriating yet irresistible, rapidly hook up, and then continue to hook up over many, many years, only to slowly, excruciatingly, fall in love. It’s somehow both slow-burn and bangs immediately. You know U-Haul lesbians? These guys are the exact opposite. (Move-away gays? I’ll have to workshop that more.)
Anyway. The book is mostly sex scenes by volume, and not a single one is repetitive or wasted, because it’s how the character and relationship development happen.
It’s now a TV show, adapted by Jacob Tierney. That’s the same guy who brought you Letterkenny and Shoresy, neither of which I’ve watched, but which I’ve been aware of for years now because people whose tastes I trust have watched them and loved them and told me I should watch them. Sorry, guys, it took the power of gay hockey idiots to drag me into the Tierney-verse. I’m here now, and I love it!
The thing you need to know about this show is: it leans in. It fully commits to the bit. Look, I know I keep talking about how this show is worth watching above and beyond the sex and the beefcake, but the fact of the matter is, you can’t extricate the show from the sex and the beefcake, because it’s a show. About hockey players. Who fall in love because they fuck. A lot. Over many years. So yes, I’m going to talk about the sex.
OK! (snip-I can’t copy-paste their whole post; go read it, it’s great!)
I enjoy Tig Notaro’s talent. Especially when she shares it for worthy causes.
Scottie's Playtime 