(original hanging in the Hay-Adam’s Off the Record bar)
My colleague KAL has also a post about the coasters he, Matt Wuerker, and I created for the bar.
(Note from A: Click through on KAL’s-you’ll love it!)
Irritating Screechy Blowhole by Clay Jones
Look, Europe! Our president (sic) is a raving lunatic Read on Substack
It’s one thing for Donald Trump to display his deteriorating mental state here at home, like ranting about lightbulbs or batteries so heavy that they sink boats to waiting sharks, but it’s another thing for TACO to go overseas and reassure our friends and allies that the United States of America has an insane racist at the helm (he howled about immigration into Europe).
While sitting next to European Commission chief Ursula von der Leyen, Trump went on a rant about windmills…again.
Trump said in a long-winded rant, “And the other thing I say to Europe, we will not allow a windmill to be built in the United States, they’re killing us. They’re killing the beauty of our scenery, our valleys, our beautiful plains. And I’m not talking about airplanes, I’m talking about beautiful plains, beautiful areas of the United States, and you look up and you see windmills all over the place, it’s a horrible thing. It’s the most expensive form of energy; it’s no good. They’re made in China, almost all of them. When they start to rust and rot in eight years, you can’t really turn them off, you can’t bury them, they won’t let you. But the propellers, the props, because they’re a certain type of fiber that doesn’t go well with the land, that’s what they say. The environmentalists say you can’t bury them because the fiber doesn’t go well with the land; in other words, if you bury it, it will harm our soil. The whole thing is a con job.”
Keep in mind, Trump’s Environmental Protection Agency is fighting its own power to fight Climate Change. Talk about a con job. (snip-yadayada [Trump] I mean MORE)
Black Indigenous Chefs Are Reclaiming Identity Through Food — One Dish at a Time by Michael Harriot
Black Native food workers are passing down culinary traditions, restoring lost connections and feeding body and soul. Read on Substack
Crystal Wahpepah (Photo courtesy of Crystal Wahpepah)
The Indigenous food movement has seen a renaissance in North America, with restaurant openings, cookbook releases and community initiatives that announce the presence, expertise and heritage of Indigenous food workers. Amidst this moment, Black Native food workers have seen both the beauty and the harshness of living at the intersection of Blackness and Indigeneity, as the dominant settler colonial culture of the United States often tries to erase or flatten all parts of their identities.
But those attempts at erasure have also provided moments of reflection and insight, and a realization that the mission of Black Indigenous food workers is profoundly spiritual and political healing work. For Stephan Oak, a Black and Lakota forager and woodworker who lives in Detroit, the threads of connection that Black Indigenous people hold in their family stories that are “steeped in violence, but also steeped in love and resistance” are also guides that allow them to connect in the past, present, and future — a shared cosmology.
Crystal Wahpepah, who is Black and Kickapoo and the executive chef and owner of Wahpepah’s Kitchen in Oakland, Calif., says that often, through representation and education, Black Native people in the food industry come to a deeper peace about their identity and heritage. At Wahpepah’s Kitchen, over cornbread dishes from the Ute and Kickapoo people, wild rice from the Great Lakes tribes and bison from the Great Plains, people often find themselves.
“I meet so many people who are Black and Native but never felt connected to their Indigenous side, and when they meet me, they start talking about it, about culture, about those things that have been lost,” she says. Wahpepah is also opening a new restaurant, A Feather and a Fork, which is also the title of her upcoming cookbook.
That loss is something felt in both Black and Indigenous communities and can often feel pronounced because of family separation through residential schools, land expulsions, the trans-Atlantic slave trade and the domestic slave trade that broke up Black families across the country. “Because of colonial violence, there’s a fractured relationship to home or your connection to your ancestors,” says Oak. “The intent of the colonizer is to stop you from looking … to accept the identity of the conditions they’ve placed on you.”
Food is one of the ways Oak and others are reclaiming autonomy over their identities, especially as governments use food as a weapon by depriving communities of affordable, culturally relevant food. Oak points out that even amidst food deserts on reservations and urban Black communities, people find ways to be more self-sufficient and connect back to the land, which helps them reconnect with the essence of who they are. (snip-MORE; lots more but not too long)
Crystal Wahpepah’s wild rice salad with strawberries and pecans (Courtesy of Crystal Wahpepah)
Israeli Prime Minister is such a liar that even Donald Trump is calling him out. Hell, Marjorie Taylor Greene is accusing him of committing genocide. Ouch.
Bibi denied claims that he’s starving Gaza, and said, “There is no policy of starvation in Gaza, and there is no starvation in Gaza. We enable humanitarian aid throughout the duration of the war to enter Gaza – otherwise, there would be no Gazans.”
He’s a liar. Israel has bombed convoys bringing in humanitarian relief to Gaza, and it won’t allow aid from the United Nations to enter Gaza half the time.
The World Health Organization said Sunday there have been 63 malnutrition-related deaths in Gaza this month, including 24 children under the age of 5, up from 11 deaths total in the previous six months of the year.
Gaza’s Health Ministry puts the number even higher, reporting 82 deaths this month of malnutrition-related causes: 24 children and 58 adults. Yesterday, it said that 14 deaths were reported in the past 24 hours. The ministry, which operates under the Hamas government, is headed by medical professionals and is seen by the U.N. as the most reliable source of data on casualties. U.N. agencies also often confirm numbers through other partners on the ground.
The WHO also said acute malnutrition in northern Gaza tripled this month, reaching nearly one in five children under 5 years old, and has doubled in central and southern Gaza. The U.N. says Gaza’s only four specialized treatment centers for malnutrition are “overwhelmed.” Children are going days without eating.
Palestinians want a full return to the U.N.-led aid distribution system that was in place throughout the war, rather than the Israeli-backed mechanism that began in May.
55 trucks from the United Nations’ food program entered Gaza yesterday, and they were all looted by starving Gazans. There are also food drops, but that’s not enough.
Witnesses and health workers say Israeli forces have killed hundreds by opening fire on Palestinians trying to reach food distribution hubs or while crowding around entering aid trucks. The Israeli Defense Force says it has fired warning shots to disperse threats. But as we’ve learned throughout this war, the IDF lies.
The UN needs the IDF’s permission to bring food into Gaza, and they claim the military denies them over half the time. The Hamas police would protect the trucks from being looted by hungry Gazans, but they stopped after being shot at by the IDF. (snip-MORE)
While meeting with the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom, Kier Starmer, Donald Trump said he had been invited to Epstein’s Island, but that he turned it down and “never had the privilege” of visiting the island. It was right then that PM Starmer realized he was sitting with a lunatic who is most likely a pedophile.
Trump deflected to other people, saying, “I never went to the island, and Bill Clinton went there supposedly 28 times. I never went to the island, but (former Treasury Secretary) Larry Summers, I hear, went there, he was the head of Harvard. And many other people that are very big people, nobody ever talks about them.”
That word salad makes you wonder how much Adderall Trump snorted before his meeting with Starmer.
There are no records of Bill Clinton ever going to Epstein’s private island, so I don’t know where Trump got the number 28 from when he can’t even find one visit. The thing is, Donald Trump is a liar and a golf cheat. More on that in a minute.
Trump said, “I never had the privilege of going to his island, and I did turn him down. But a lot of people in Palm Beach were invited to his island. In one of my very good moments, I turned it down. I didn’t want to go to his island.”
All of Donald Trump’s moments are pretty bad, at least for other people. Saying you never had the privilege of visiting a pedophile’s island is not a good moment. Neither are the moments he flew on Epstein’s private jet, or the times he partied with Epstein while they were ogling young women. (snip-MORE)
Of course, I’m just joking, but I might be starting something here. If MAGAts can believe in chemtrails (and they do), then they can believe President Barack Obama used Kenyan voodoo to give Trump cankles. They already believe in a lot of crazy shit.
The Trump administration claims that Obama committed treason by ordering an investigation into Russia collusion, but how is that treason? Who is it treasonous to, Trump? Is it treasonous to Russia? And how is ordering an investigation into an attack against our country treasonous? I think it’s more treasonous to ignore it or lie about it. It should be treasonous to take Putin’s side over America’s.
If Trump were president in World War II, and Russia had bombed Pearl Harbor on December 7, he would have called it a “hoax” and “fake news.”
Now, Trump is coming up with more bullshit to distract his zombies from the Epstein case. He’s howling for prosecuting Beyonce and Oprah. Even if what he was howling about was true, a president (sic) is supposed to let the Justice Department do its job, and leave it alone. Here, Trump wants the DOJ to prosecute Beyoncé and Oprah for supporting his political opponent.
MAGAts have been asking us, “How is Trump fascist?” Ordering the prosecution of your political opponents is just one example of fascism.
One final note: I do know that voodoo is not Kenyan. (snip)
Die, Die, UVA DEI, Die by Clay Jones
A board without diversity will hire the next UVA president Read on Substack
Abigail Spanberger will be Virginia’s next governor. Governor Glenn Youngkin knows this and has probably known throughout his regime that not only was he limited to one term, but so was his party. Just as Trump left things horrible for Joe Biden to clean up in 2021, Youngkin is leaving a mess for the next governor. With help from the Trump regime, one of those messes is at UVA, the University of Virginia.
As you may remember, Trump’s politicized Department of Justice, chock-full of goons, has forced out the president of UVA over DEI policies. They used his integrity against him, blackmailing him by withholding federal funds unless he resigned.
Now, UVA’s Board of Visitors will hire a new president. Unfortunately, the board is stocked entirely of right-wing fucknuts appointed by Glenn Youngkin, including former state Attorney General and member of the first Trump regime, Ken Cuccinelli. The board is nearly as White as the Trump cabinet. Even the two non-white members probably love them some mayonnaise sandwiches.
Trump has stripped funding for schools to implement his anti-DEI policies, which include shutting down student protests. Columbia University recently agreed to pay a $200 million fine to protect its funding, but lost a huge chunk of its independence to the Trump regime. (snip-MORE, and it’s very good!)
Trump has tried several deflections from the Epstein Files, including revoking Rosie O’Donnell’s citizenship, forcing the Washington Commanders to change its name back to the racist one, claiming President Obama committed treason by ordering an investigation into Russia’s election meddling in 2016, and now Mexican Coca-Cola.
The Coca-Cola available in the USA is made with corn syrup. The Coca-Cola made in Mexico is made with cane sugar. A lot of people claim the soft drink made with sugar tastes better than the version made with corn syrup. I’m sure I had it when I was younger, but I don’t remember if it was better.
I do love Coca-Cola. I do think Coke in a glass bottle tastes better than it does in plastic. Sometimes, fountain Cokes, depending on where you get them, taste better than all of them. I grew up drinking Coca-Cola. (snip-MORE)
And a reminder since there will be people who try to change the narrative of this cartoon: Criticizing the Israeli government and its policies is not antisemitic.
Back in 2000, the guys from South Park, Trey Parker and Matt Stone, created a new TV series titled That’s My Bush. Guess who it was about. While the series included topics like abortion, the death penalty, drugs, drilling in the Arctic Wildlife Refuge, and gun control, it was mostly a hit on family-based sitcoms, except this family just so happened to live in the White House. It came complete with an annoying neighbor. The main character, George W. Bush, would say to his wife, Laura Bush, “One of these days, Laura, I’m gonna punch you in the face!”
You would expect a show from the South Park guys about George W. Bush to rip the president apart. While it did make him out to be an idiot, he was also a lovable oaf with good intentions. He was not hateful, evil, or mean. Though it did hit Dick Cheney pretty good, and showed him commit a hostile takeover in one episode, and Bush temporarily became a Luchadore professional wrestler until he was restored to office. Critics loved the show, but it was too expensive for a small network like Comedy Central. It only lasted eight episodes. Even if it had been renewed, I’m sure 9/11, which occurred five months after the last episode aired, would have killed it.
The show was planned to be about a President Al Gore, but surprising Parker and Stone, Florida happened, so the entire thing had to be rewritten.
One thing that did not happen was outrage expressed by the Bush administration. I’m sure there were people in the White House who were aware of it, and either snickered at it or were outraged, but these were the days when most people in government were adults.
President Bush never stood in the driveway howling to reporters about the losers lampooning him on TV, or talked about low ratings, or how they were the stupid ones, not him, etc, etc. These were the days before social media, but I still don’t think Bush would have cried to his base on Twitter. The Bush administration ignored it. (snip-MORE)
Deputy Attorney General Todd Blanche, who used to be Donald Trump’s criminal defense lawyer, spent nine hours over two days interviewing Jeffrey Epstein associate Ghislaine Maxwell about the Epstein case.
Maxwell is serving a 20-year prison sentence for aiding Epstein in the sex trafficking of minors. As you know, the deceased pedophile committed suicide in a New York jail while waiting to stand trial.
The Justice Department has granted Maxwell “limited immunity,” just so long as she tells the truth. That “truth” will be what the Trump administration wants to hear. Trump’s name is in the Epstein Files…a lot. Attorney General Pam Bondi warned Trump before she announced the files wouldn’t be released.
Maxwell’s attorney, David Markus, told ABC News on Friday that Maxwell was asked about “maybe 100 different people” and “She didn’t hold anything back.” I’m sure she and her attorney have figured out what they need to say, which is what Trump’s criminal attorney needs to hear.
Maxwell’s attorney also said, “This is not a situation where we are asking for anything in return for testimony or anything like that. Of course, everybody knows Ms. Maxwell would welcome any relief.” Wink-wink, nudge-nudge, pardon-pardon.
When asked if he was considering giving Mazwell a pardon or commuting her sentence, right before he jumped on Air Force One at our expense to play golf in Scotland, Trump said he hasn’t thought about it, but he does have the “power” to do it.
Trump also said he trusts Todd Blanche. This is the setup. This is what will happen. (snip-MORE)
This is not a work of fiction. It’s from my clinical notes, drawn from the quiet corners of a family learning how to listen, how to see, and how to love. What follows is Maya’s story—and ours too. It began with misunderstanding and grew into music. It was shaped by silence, and strengthened by learning how to hear what was never said out loud.
—
🧠 Main Characters
• Maya (17) – A brilliant, autistic teen who expresses herself through music but struggles with verbal communication and sensory overload. Her inner world is rich, but rarely understood.
• Daniel (45) – Her father, a pragmatic man who misinterpreted Maya’s behavior as defiance. He’s emotionally shut down but carries deep guilt.
• Leah (43) – Her mother, who tried to advocate for Maya but became isolated in the process. She’s exhausted, but still hopeful.
• Eli (15) – Maya’s younger brother, who felt invisible growing up. He’s witty, sarcastic, and secretly protective of Maya.
—
I. The Fracture
The house had grown quiet over the years—not the peaceful kind, but the kind that echoed with things unsaid. Leah sat at the kitchen table, her fingers wrapped around a chipped mug, staring at the steam like it held answers. Upstairs, Maya rocked gently in her chair, headphones on, fingers twitching over her keyboard. Her music was her voice now.
Eli moved through the house like a ghost. He didn’t slam doors or raise his voice. He just existed in the spaces between tension. And Daniel—he hadn’t been home in months. He lived alone now, in a small apartment filled with regrets and unopened letters.
Maya had always been different. Brilliant, but misunderstood. Her silence wasn’t emptiness—it was survival. Her meltdowns weren’t tantrums—they were overload. But Daniel never saw that. He saw defiance. He saw rebellion. And slowly, the family unraveled.
—
II. The Breaking Point
It happened at school. Maya, overwhelmed by noise and light and chaos, collapsed in the hallway. Hands over her ears, rocking, humming. Someone filmed it. Of course they did.
Eli found the video first. He didn’t speak. Just slid his phone across the table to Leah and walked out.
That night, Leah called Daniel.
“She was screaming,” she said. “And no one heard her.”
Daniel arrived the next morning. He stood in the doorway like a stranger. Eli didn’t look up. Maya didn’t come down. Leah didn’t cry. Not anymore.
“She doesn’t talk much,” Leah said. “But she plays.”
Daniel didn’t understand. Not yet.
—
III. The Song
Eli knocked on Maya’s door. “Can I record you?” he asked.
She didn’t answer, but she didn’t say no.
He sat on the floor, phone in hand, and watched as Maya’s fingers danced across the keys. The melody was aching, defiant, beautiful. It was everything she couldn’t say.
He uploaded it that night. The Quiet Between Us.
The video spread. Comments poured in. People who felt seen. People who understood.
Daniel watched it on repeat, tears streaking his face.
“I didn’t know she could feel like that,” he said.
“She always did,” Leah replied. “You just didn’t know how to listen.”
—
IV. The Shift
Daniel knocked on Maya’s door. She didn’t look up, but she didn’t turn away.
“I heard your song,” he said. “I’m sorry I didn’t hear you sooner.”
Maya reached for her keyboard. Played a single note. Then another.
Daniel sat beside her, silent. Listening.
Leah watched from the hallway, hand over her heart.
Eli uploaded another video: The Quiet Between Us – Live.
They began to change. Slowly. Imperfectly.
Daniel stopped trying to fix. He started trying to understand.
Leah stopped carrying everything alone. She let herself be held.
Eli stopped disappearing. He became the bridge.
And Maya? She kept playing.
—
V. The Reconnection
They sat together in the living room. Maya played. Eli recorded. Leah smiled. Daniel closed his eyes and listened.
No one spoke. But everything was said.
They weren’t perfect. But they were real.
And in the quiet between them, they found something louder than words.
They found each other.
🎵 Epilogue: The Song That Speaks (Follows graphic)
—
🎵 Epilogue: The Song That Speaks
Maya’s music became a language for others.
Eli started a podcast for neurodivergent families.
Daniel and Leah spoke at workshops. Not as experts—but as learners.
Their story wasn’t about fixing.
It was about listening.
About loving each other—not in spite of difference,
but with it.
Because love isn’t always loud.
Sometimes, it’s quiet.
And sometimes, the quiet is where love begins.
This is more than a story. It’s a lived truth. Signed not with ink—but with the quiet strength of love, survival, and rediscovery.
While asshole billionaires are enjoying the continuation of huge tax cuts, Donald Trump and Republicans realized, maybe, that this will actually increase our national debt. Why didn’t somebody say something? So in order to slow down the bleeding, the goons looked for where they could make some cuts and save. No, they did not cut the budgets for ICE, defense, bombs for Israel to drop on the kids in Gaza, Trump golf trips, or Trump birthday parades. Maybe they could sell the plane Qatar bribed Trump with, if anyone else actually wanted it.
Trump and Republicans passed a bill that will cut $1.1 billion in federal funding for PBS and NPR. Trump is all giddy about this and posted to ShitSocial…
Of course, this impacts Sesame Street. What kind of asshole hates Sesame Street? Donald Trump is that kind of asshole. Donald Trump was an asshole millionaire by the time he was 8 years old. His allowance at 3 years old was around $200,000 a year. That explains why he doesn’t have any appreciation for Sesame Street. If nothing else, Sesame Street could have taught him how to count his money and maybe realize that if you spend more than you bring in, you will increase debt. Cookie Monster knows this. You can’t eat more cookies than you have. Maybe if Trump watched Sesame Street, he wouldn’t speak like a drugged-out crackhead and could talk the king’s English as well as the president of Liberia.
Sesame Street might have saved Trump from being the kind of asshole who sexually assaults and rapes women. It could have saved him from being a grifter and a thief. It could have saved him from growing up into a racist liar. Sesame Street could have saved Trump from turning into Trump.
As Matt Hooper said in Jaws while describing a Great White Shark as a machine, “All this machine does is swim and eat and make little sharks, and that’s all.” Trump is also a machine, and all that asshole machine does is grift, sexually assault women, and make little assholes.
By the way, have you seen a photo of Barron Trump lately? He’s cultivating the asshole look. He may be taking grooming tips from older brother, Don Jr. Fortunately, Barron hasn’t developed the coke-up dazed expression yet, so for now, he only has the Christian Bale serial killer look from American Psycho.
Anyhoosies, we’re supposed to be talking about Big Bird and not Big Turd, the serial killer of democracy. I wanted to avoid drawing Big Bird for a cartoon on this subject, as so many other cartoonists did this week. But after I got the bucket idea, how could I not?
That’s the blog for today, Peezeheads. One of my clients asked for a local cartoon this morning, and he asked about an hour ago if he could have it by 11 a.m. tomorrow. I haven’t even read the article yet, so I should do that. You’re also going to get a blog about Ozzy. Stay tooned. And no talking about Ozzy in the comments until the Ozzy blog. Pretend you’re a Republican and Ozzy is the Epstein Client List. (snip-MORE)
The year was 1877, and Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky was drowning. Not in the Moscow River, though he’d fucking consider it soon enough, but in the suffocating heteronormative bullshit of Imperial Russia. Here was a man whose soul screamed in B-flat minor, whose heart pounded in 4/4 time, and whose sexual identity was buried so deep beneath layers of social expectation that it would take historians over a century to dig through the wreckage and find the truth: Tchaikovsky was gay as a fucking rainbow, and it nearly destroyed him.
I literally played the youtube video musical all through writing this shit. Thats how fucking awesome this is.
Tchaikovsy, how I love you.
The Tortured Genius Behind the Swan Lake
Let’s cut through the academic ass-kissing and get to the brutal reality. Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky, born in 1840 in Votkinsk, Russia, was a man caught between two worlds: the soaring heights of musical genius and the crushing depths of societal homophobia. This wasn’t some gentle “product of his time” situation—this was a death sentence with a fucking bow tie.
In 19th-century Russia, being gay wasn’t just socially unacceptable; it was literally illegal and punishable by exile to Siberia or worse. The Orthodox Church considered homosexuality a mortal sin, the state considered it a criminal act, and society considered it grounds for complete social annihilation. Tchaikovsky knew this shit intimately, and it carved holes in his psyche that would bleed beautiful, agonizing music for the rest of his life.
The evidence of Tchaikovsky’s sexuality isn’t hidden in some dusty archive—it’s splattered across his correspondence like blood on a battlefield. His letters to men, particularly to his nephew Vladimir “Bob” Davydov, drip with passion that no amount of Victorian-era emotional repression can disguise. These weren’t your typical “Dear Friend” pleasantries; these were love letters disguised as family correspondence, each word carefully chosen to dance around the truth that could have killed him.
The Marriage That Nearly Killed Him
Enter Antonina Miliukova, a woman whose timing was about as good as a heart attack during a symphony performance. In 1877, this aspiring opera singer decided to confess her love to Tchaikovsky through a series of increasingly desperate letters. Most gay men throughout history have developed sophisticated avoidance techniques for such situations, but Tchaikovsky was operating under a particularly cruel form of internalized homophobia mixed with genuine terror.
The composer’s response? He fucking married her. On July 18, 1877, Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky walked down the aisle like a man walking to his execution, because that’s essentially what it was. The marriage was a disaster from day one—a psychological horror show that lasted all of nine weeks before Tchaikovsky fled like his ass was on fire.
But those nine weeks? They nearly broke him completely. Tchaikovsky’s mental health, already fragile from years of sexual repression and social anxiety, shattered like a champagne flute hitting concrete. He attempted suicide by walking into the Moscow River in October 1877, hoping to catch pneumonia and die “naturally” rather than face the shame of admitting his marriage was a lie. The water was too fucking cold, and he survived, but the psychological damage was done.
The Brother Who Lived Free
While Pyotr was busy torturing himself with heteronormative performance art, his younger brother Modest was living his truth with the kind of balls that would make a bull jealous. Modest Tchaikovsky was openly gay in a time when that shit could get you killed, and he gave exactly zero fucks about what society thought.
Modest became a prominent playwright and librettist, penning the libretto for Pyotr’s “Queen of Spades” among other works. Their artistic collaboration flowed from deep fraternal understanding and shared sensibilities—two gay brothers finding ways to create beauty in a world that wanted them dead. But the difference between them was stark: Modest embraced his identity and lived authentically, while Pyotr remained trapped in a cage of his own making.
The psychological impact of watching his brother live freely while he remained closeted must have been excruciating. Modest’s existence was living proof that authenticity was possible, even in Imperial Russia, but Pyotr’s internalized shame and terror kept him locked away from his own truth.
The Music That Bled Truth
Here’s where Tchaikovsky’s genius becomes both heartbreaking and historically significant: he couldn’t live his truth, so he composed it. Every note, every crescendo, every heart-wrenching melody was a piece of his closeted soul screaming for recognition. The “Pathétique” Symphony, his final masterpiece, isn’t just music—it’s a fucking suicide note written in B minor.
Listen to the 1812 Overture and try to tell me that’s the work of a heterosexual man. The dramatic tension, the explosive release, the way it builds to an almost unbearable climax—this is the musical equivalent of a man who’s been sexually and emotionally repressed his entire life finally finding a way to express what he can’t say out loud.
Swan Lake, The Nutcracker, Sleeping Beauty—these aren’t just ballets, they’re coded messages from a gay man who couldn’t be gay. The tragic heroines, the impossible love stories, the themes of transformation and hidden identity—Tchaikovsky was writing his own story in every goddamn note, and the world was too busy enjoying the pretty music to notice the pain behind it.
The Psychological Massacre of the Closet
The psychological effects of Tchaikovsky’s forced closeting weren’t just personal—they were epidemic. Here was one of the world’s greatest composers, a man whose music would outlive empires, reduced to a trembling, suicidal wreck because he couldn’t love who he wanted to love. The internalized homophobia didn’t just damage him; it robbed the world of the person he could have been if he’d been free to live authentically.
Tchaikovsky’s diaries and letters reveal a man in constant psychological torment. He described his sexuality as a “curse” and spent his life trying to cure himself of feelings that were as natural as breathing. The self-hatred was so profound that it affected every aspect of his existence—his relationships, his work, his health, even his death.
The composer died in 1893, officially of cholera, but the circumstances were suspicious enough that many historians believe he committed suicide. Whether he died by disease or by his own hand, the cause was the same: a society that killed its own children rather than let them love freely.
The Ripple Effect on LGBTQ+ History
Tchaikovsky’s story isn’t just about one tortured genius—it’s about the systematic destruction of queer lives throughout history. Every note he wrote in anguish represents thousands of LGBTQ+ people who were crushed by the same forces that nearly destroyed him. His music became a sanctuary for queer people who recognized their own pain in his melodies, a coded language that said “you are not alone” to generations of closeted individuals.
The philosophical implications are staggering. Here was a man whose gifts to humanity were immeasurable, whose music brought joy to millions, whose artistic legacy is literally priceless—and society nearly destroyed him because of who he loved. How many other Tchaikovskys did we lose? How many symphonies were never written because their composers were too busy trying to survive in a world that wanted them dead?
The Social Impact of Closeted Genius
Tchaikovsky’s forced closeting had massive social implications that ripple through history. His marriage to Antonina became a cautionary tale about the dangers of forced heteronormative performance, but it also demonstrated how society’s homophobia damages everyone involved. Antonina became a victim too, trapped in a marriage with a man who could never love her the way she deserved.
The composer’s patroness, Nadezhda von Meck, provided him with financial support for thirteen years on the condition that they never meet in person. This relationship, conducted entirely through letters, became one of the most important in his life precisely because it was free from the sexual and social expectations that tormented him elsewhere. Von Meck understood, perhaps intuitively, that Tchaikovsky needed space to be himself—even if she never knew exactly what that meant.
The Philosophical Questions That Haunt Us
Tchaikovsky’s life raises philosophical questions that should make every thinking person’s blood boil. What is the moral cost of forcing human beings to deny their fundamental nature? How do we measure the artistic and social contributions we lost when we systemically oppressed LGBTQ+ people? What masterpieces were never created because their potential creators were too busy fighting for survival?
The composer’s struggle with his identity wasn’t just personal—it was a reflection of humanity’s broader failure to accept and celebrate diversity. His music became a form of resistance, a way of smuggling queer sensibility into mainstream culture without triggering the violent backlash that open authenticity would have provoked.
The Legacy That Survives
Despite the psychological torture he endured, Tchaikovsky’s music survives as a testament to the resilience of the human spirit. His compositions continue to move audiences to tears, to inspire dancers and musicians, to provide soundtrack for some of humanity’s most beautiful moments. The Swan Lake pas de deux has become synonymous with romantic love, performed by countless couples who have no idea they’re dancing to the work of a closeted gay man.
This is the ultimate irony: the music that emerged from Tchaikovsky’s repression has become the soundtrack for heterosexual romance across the globe. His pain became everyone’s pleasure, his torment became the world’s joy. It’s both beautiful and heartbreaking—a reminder that LGBTQ+ people have always been here, creating beauty even in the darkest circumstances.
The Modern Relevance
Tchaikovsky’s story remains devastatingly relevant because homophobia didn’t die with the 19th century. In Putin’s Russia, being openly gay is still dangerous. In dozens of countries around the world, LGBTQ+ people face imprisonment, violence, or death for being authentic. The composer’s struggle continues in the lives of countless individuals who still can’t live their truth without fear.
But his story also demonstrates the power of art to transcend oppression. Tchaikovsky couldn’t be openly gay, but his music queered the world anyway. Every performance of Swan Lake is a small act of resistance, every rendition of the Nutcracker Suite is a celebration of queer creativity, every tear shed during the Pathétique Symphony is a recognition of the pain caused by forcing people to hide who they are.
The Psychological Impact on Modern LGBTQ+ Communities
For modern LGBTQ+ people, Tchaikovsky’s story serves as both inspiration and warning. His music provides comfort and validation—proof that queer people have always existed, have always created beauty, have always found ways to express their truth even under impossible circumstances. But his psychological torture also serves as a reminder of what happens when society forces people to deny their authentic selves.
The composer’s internalized homophobia mirrors the struggles many LGBTQ+ people face today. The self-hatred, the attempts to “cure” himself, the desperate conformity to heteronormative expectations—these patterns persist in communities where acceptance is still lacking. Tchaikovsky’s story helps modern queer people understand that their struggles are part of a larger historical pattern, that they’re not alone in their pain.
The Fucking Truth We Can’t Ignore
Here’s the bottom line: Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky was gay as a fucking rainbow, and society nearly destroyed one of history’s greatest musical geniuses because of it. His story isn’t just about one man’s struggle—it’s about the systematic oppression of LGBTQ+ people throughout history and the incalculable cost of that oppression.
Every time someone tries to deny or diminish Tchaikovsky’s sexuality, they’re participating in the same erasure that tortured him during his lifetime. Every time someone argues that his personal life doesn’t matter, they’re missing the point entirely. His sexuality wasn’t separate from his music—it was the source of his music, the pain that created beauty, the truth that couldn’t be spoken but had to be expressed.
The evidence is there for anyone willing to look: the passionate letters, the disastrous marriage, the psychological torment, the coded themes in his compositions. Tchaikovsky was a gay man living in a world that wanted him dead, and he survived by bleeding music instead of truth. His story deserves to be told honestly, completely, and without the sanitizing bullshit that has obscured it for too long.
We owe it to Tchaikovsky, to his brother Modest, to every LGBTQ+ person who has ever had to hide their truth, to tell this story with the visceral honesty it deserves. Because in the end, the music was never just about entertainment—it was about survival, resistance, and the unbreakable human spirit that creates beauty even in the darkest fucking circumstances.
Tchaikovsky’s legacy isn’t just musical—it’s a testament to the fact that LGBTQ+ people have always been here, creating the culture that defines human civilization, even when that same civilization tried to destroy them. His story is our story, his pain is our pain, and his music is our victory song—a reminder that love, in all its forms, will always find a way to express itself, even when the world tries to silence it.
Citations:
Suchet J. 2019 “Tchaikovsky: The Man Revealed”
Poznansky, K. 2014 “Tchaikovsky: The Quest for the Inner Man “
Last Friday, Tulsi Gabbard, the Director of National Intelligence (sic), released a report she claims showed a “treasonous conspiracy in 2016” by top Obama administration officials to harm Donald Trump.
This is bizarre because over the past eight years, the entire Intelligence network agreed that Russia interfered in the 2016 election to undermine our elections and to help Donald Trump win the presidency.
Also, it could be treasonous for an American president to manipulate an election, but it’s not treasonous to oppose Donald Trump, which is how the administration is framing this. When Trump lied that Obama “wiretapped” Trump Tower, he called it “treasonous.” It could be illegal without a warrant, but it wouldn’t be treasonous. However, it was a huge lie. Maybe lying to the American people repeatedly should be considered treasonous.
President Barack Obama never broke the law. Trump has broken the law repeatedly. He’s breaking the law now.
Trump likes to call what happened in 2016 the “Russia hoax.” Robert Mueller was never able to assert that Trump colluded with Russia, but only because the investigation ended early after then-Attorney General William Barr basically pulled the rug out from under Mueller. But Trump did collude with Russia. The Trump Campaign shared polling data with Russia. Isn’t that colluding? They invited Russians into their campaign HQ to provide “dirt” on Hillary Clinton. Trump even asked Russia to find Hillary Clinton’s “missing emails.” Does anyone remember, “Russia, if you’re listening”? Does anyone remember that Russia started hacking the Democratic National Committee on that very same day? Asking for Russia’s help, and receiving it on the same day, sure sounds like colluding.
Intelligence agencies and Senate investigators spent years reviewing the investigations and concluded that during the 2016 election, Russia conducted probing operations of election systems to see if they could change vote outcomes. While Russia extracted voter registration data in Illinois and Arizona, and probed in other states, there was no evidence that they attempted to actually change votes.
The Obama administration never claimed that Russian hackers manipulated votes, just that they meddled, as in conducting influence operations to change public opinion, using fake social media posts from the Russian Troll Farm to sow division among voters, and leaking documents stolen from the DNC to hurt Clinton. These are not opinions, they’re facts. Even a Republican-led Senate report said this was true. One of those Republicans today is Trump’s Secretary of State, Marco Rubio.
Obama ordered intelligence officials to review the material they had collected and report what they had learned before he left office. Obama was worried that the incoming Trump regime would bury all reports and facts about Russia’s meddling, and Obama was right to be concerned.
Later in Helsinki, Donald Trump stood next to Vladimir Putin and took his side over that of America, and defended Putin from accusations of meddling in our election.
Garbage, I mean Gabbard is upset by an email from an assistant to then-Director of National Intelligence, James Clapper, that said Obama was seeking a new assessment of the “tools Moscow used and actions it took to influence the 2016 election.” Gabbard believes that’s treasonous, but then again, she’s always been a useful idiot for Putin.
How exactly is it treasonous or even A-ha, to ask, “How did Russia do it?”
Now, the CIA is referring James Brennan, the former CIA Director, to the FBI, run by conspiracy theorist Kash Patel, for a criminal investigation. How is conducting an investigation, not on Trump but on Russia, criminal?
Gabbard’s report highlighted that there was “no indication of a Russian threat to directly manipulate the actual vote count,” then contrasted that with the spy agencies’ ultimate conclusion in December 2016 that Putin “aspired to help President-elect Trump’s election chances.”
The report is saying that our election system (pay attention, MAGAts) wasn’t manipulated, just that Putin tried to manipulate the results of the election.
The report focused on a decision intelligence officials made at the time against producing an article for the president’s daily intelligence briefing that would have said that the Russians “did not impact recent U.S. election results by conducting malicious cyber activities against election infrastructure.” That report was not added to President Obama’s daily briefing because they didn’t know if it was true. It wasn’t.
While Russia did not impact the vote count, it did affect the results. How is Obama having these investigations done, which were to protect our nation, treasonous? A better question might be: Is it treasonous for a president to engage in real estate deals and accept free jets from monarchies?
If an American president (sic) acted treasonously, it’s Donald Trump for trying to steal the 2020 election he lost.
One of my senators, Mark Warner, the top Democrat on the Intelligence Committee, said Gabbard’s report compared two different things: Russian attempts to hack into voting systems and Russian influence operations meant to sway public opinion. If Gabbard can’t understand that difference, and we know Trump can’t, then she’s not qualified to be the Director of National Intelligence.
Good luck explaining the difference between hacking into a voting system and swaying public opinion, as Gabbard’s comprehension skills are on the same level as your attic-dwelling MAGA uncle.
The Director of National Intelligence should have some intelligence. She’s as qualified for her position as Pete Hegseth, Kristi Noem, and Pam Bondi are for theirs.
Warner said, “This is one more example of the director of national intelligence trying to cook the books. We’re talking about apples and oranges. The Russians were not successful at manipulating our election infrastructure, nor did we say they were.”
Warner pointed out that as recently as March, the intelligence community reported that Russia is still using influence campaigns to sow dissent in the West. Duh. They never stopped. And why would they when it works? They’ve hacked into other Western nations, but they had their greatest success with our elections, probably because American voters are more gullible. And not just conservatives. Raise your hand if you believed Rachel Maddow and Stephen Colbert are going to do a show together because you saw it on Facebook.
The report found that “Moscow probably believes information operations efforts to influence U.S. elections are advantageous,” and that undermining the integrity of American elections was a key goal.
Warner said, “They acknowledged that Russia’s effort to meddle goes on. That was an assessment under her watch,” he said, referring to Gabbard. See? She’s stupid.
Warner said his committee found no attempt by Obama or senior officials to manipulate the findings.
William Barr appointed a special counsel shortly before Trump left office in 2021 to investigate the investigators, and none of this came up.
You know what Harry would say? This is some bullshit.
Trump and his goons, like Tulsi Gabbard, have weaponized National Intelligence, which we used to trust, against democracy.
I hope this MAGA conspiracy theory works out even better for them than the Epstein Client List theory.
Creative note: I wanted to hit this subject after seeing that nearly every MAGA cartoonist went after it with Trump’s talking points and without any context. All their cartoons said is that President Obama committed treason. They don’t even understand the issue. These MAGAt cartoonists have a better chance of explaining quantum physics in Greek than they do of understanding this issue.
Here’s onecartoon on this, and here’s another one, and here’s one more(it wasn’t a DOJ investigation, dum-dum), and hey…I found another one, and another one(by our favorite racist duo), and here’s one by another of our favorite racists, and an idiot to boot. Nice label, dumbass. There’s not one bit of context in any of these six cartoons.
Context is hard for MAGAts, but talking points are easy.
Scottie's Playtime 
