
https://www.gocomics.com/lay-lines/2026/04/06
regard to POTUS’s mental acuity.

On Easter Sunday, Donald Trump posted to Truth Social, “Tuesday will be Power Plant Day, and Bridge Day, all wrapped up in one, in Iran. There will be nothing like it! ! ! Open the Fuckin’ Strait, you crazy bastards, or you’ll be living in Hell – JUST WATCH! Praise be to Allah. President DONALD J. TRUMP”
Trump supporters, including the evangelicals, don’t care how vulgar he is, how insane he is, or that he is threatening to commit war crimes. They don’t care that he unleashed his tirade on Easter Sunday. They don’t care that he has gone back and forth with his demands regarding the Strait of Hormuz, from wanting to get it open, to demanding help from NATO, to saying it will open up naturally, back to demanding that Iran open it, or he will bomb them straight to hell. (snip-MORE)

No oopsies on posting Josh Johnson! Remember device/keyboard protective protocols.
Ace-Toe-Mine-Autopen by Clay Jones
Trump can’t even pronounce the medicine he’s advising against Read on Substack

Don’t take medical advice from felons and heroin addicts.
Donald Trump, RFK Jr, and Dr. Mehmet “Crudite” Oz are recommending that pregnant women not take Tylenol anymore because they claim it will give your baby autism. Real doctors would laugh at this if it weren’t so horrible.
How dare Trump and his quacks tell moms that they’re to blame if their kids have autism just because they took Tylenol to relieve pain associated with pregnancy, like headaches, sore backs, and having to live with the men who made them pregnant?
Acetaminophen is the primary ingredient in Tylenol, and a word that’s difficult for Trump to pronounce, like Thailand, which Trump pronounced as “Thighland.” He once called Yosemite National Park, “Yo-Semite.” That sounds like something you’d hear in NYC.
“Yo, Semite! You got lox on them bagels?”
During his press conference announcing the latest discovery in Trump science, Trump could not pronounce acetaminophen. Trump was rolling but came to a complete stop, as if he was on a UN escalator, and said, “Well, let’s see how we say that…”
It started off like, “acid-mo-finomen.” On his second attempt, he said, “a seed o meniphen.” Then he asked everyone in the room, “Is that OK?”
Jon Stewart answered on the Daily Show on Monday evening, “No!”
Stewart said, “We would like a second opinion, and a third pronunciation. Look, there’s already a ton of controversy around the lack of data tying acetaminophen in pregnancy to autism. And you can’t even be bothered to pronounce the fucking word correctly?”
Stewart is correct. There is a lack of date connecting Tylenol to autism, and surely not enough to go weebling around and telling pregnant women not to take it. (snip-MORE)
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Bribes-R-Us by Clay Jones
Tom Homan is not the only one taking Bribes in the Trump regime Read on Substack

Around August of last year, before the election, future-at-the-time Trump border czar Tom Homan was approached to help secure contracts in a future Trump administration, and was paid $50,000. The $50,000 was given to him in an FBI sting operation and was captured on video.
The investigation was a spinoff of another investigation because, during it, someone came across information that Tom Homan was taking bribes.
My business is squat compared to most, but still…I have never been paid in cash inside a Cava bag, or any bags for that matter. These fucknuts are worried about immigrants being paid under the table, but what the fuck is Tom Homan doing being paid with bags of cash?
The FBI and the Justice Department planned to wait to see whether Homan would deliver on his alleged promise once he became the nation’s top immigration official, but Trump was reinstalled into the White House, Pam Bondi was put in charge of the Justice Department, and Kash Patel was made FBI director, the case stalled before ultimately killing the case, stating there was nothing there.
Irony alert: Former FBI director James Comey is about to be indicted. In DC, they can’t even indict the guy throwing sandwiches at law enforcement, but they’re gonna indict Comey for lying to Republicans in the Senate.
The White House says Homan never took the money, but then again, Karoline Leavitt says a lot of bullshit that’s not true. She’s still screaming about the UN escalator even though it was Trump goons who fucked it up. The one person who hasn’t said that Tom Homan didn’t take $50,000 in a Cava bag from the FBI is Tom Homan.
Fox News’ Laura Ingraham interviewed Tom Homan a few nights ago, and she mockingly referred to MSNBC, which broke the story, as “always-reliable” MSNBC. But, Laura, at least someone from MSNBC, even dumb-dum Lawrence O’Donnell (he called RFK Jr. “Robert Downey Jr.” last night), would have asked Tom Homan one simple question.
Although if Lawrence had asked that question, it would have been like, “Did….you…take….the….fifty….thousand…dollars? I’m sorry, that shit annoys me. (snip-MORE)
Cracker Cancel Culture by Clay Jones
What will MAGA World be upset about next? Read on Substack

Cracker Barrel, the restaurant that does to down-home southern cooking what Olive Garden does to Italian food, has changed its logo from one boring image to a new boring image…and White people are upset. Seriously, they’re upset.
It’s like that time Sexy M&M ditched her Go-Go boots and Tucker Carlson had to find something new to envision while spending “quality time” with himself. Or, it’s like that time Aunt Jemima was removed from syrup bottles and old White conservatives had to find something else to get sticky with. That reminds me, do you put syrup in the fridge after you open it? I saw that on the TV show Mom (Alison Janney is the shit) last night, and I was like, “whaaaaaaa?” I always thought putting syrup in the fridge made it all stiffy. OK, I’ll get off this gross roll here and continue writing about these wankers. (snip-MORE and it is good)
Cheat To Win by Clay Jones
Republicans cheat Read on Substack

The New York Times reported that the Democratic Party is losing voters, and lost over 2.1 million between the 2020 and 2024 elections in the 30 states and Washington, DC that allow voters to register by party. Republicans, on the other han,d picked up over 2.4 million. There are still more Democrats registered nationwide, but the gap between the two parties is shrinking.
This is a fact. Don’t say it’s a fake poll like a MAGA would, because denying it isn’t how you fix it. And yeah, I get it. It’s as confusing as why anyone would choose Trump over Kamala Harris.
The truth is, too many people in this nation don’t care. (snip-MORE)
New Schools and Bathroom Rules by Clay Jones
Linda McMahon wants to see your bathroom Read on Substack

This cartoon was drawn for the FXBG Advance.
The Advance wrote this to go with today’s cartoon: Fredericksburg City Schools had a tough summer (well, the School Board did, anyway), but there were some good things this year, like the opening of two new schools. What could possibly go wrong? Well, when the new U.S. Education Secretary’s experience for the job is being able to distinguish a Camel Clutch from a Cobra Clutch, and her idea of a towering academic intellectual is Hulk Hogan, a lot. Yes, the Trump Administration specializes in hiring — how should I put this kindly — less-than-smart people to lead federal agencies. So rather than ‘rassling’ with serious education issues, we spend our time banning every book with a black face on it and having freak-outs about bathrooms. Yeah, that’s gonna make America great. Just ask Clay Jones.
Linda McMahon and the Education Department are going after five schools in Northern Virginia over bathrooms. (snip-MORE)
Newsom Nuisance by Clay Jones
Gavin Newsom is trolling Trump Read on Substack

California Governor Gavin Newsom has been trolling Donald Trump, or at least his press office has. It’s being done in the style of Trump. The tweets coming from Newsom’s account are mimicking Trump’s style, as in stupid, praising himself, belittling in a juvenile way, full of narcissism, and often in all caps.
Here’s one tweeted out after Trump’s press conference with Putin:
TRUMP JUST FLED THE PODIUM WITH PUTIN — NO QUESTIONS, NOTHING! TOTAL LOW ENERGY. THE MAN LOOKED LIKE HE’D JUST EATEN 3 BUCKETS OF KFC WITH VLAD. IS HE AFRAID THE PRESS WILL ASK ABOUT ME??? (AMERICA’S FAVORITE GOVERNOR) AND THE FACT I “STOLE THE CAMERAS” THIS WEEK WITH “THE MAPS”? MANY PEOPLE ARE SAYING HE BEGGED PUTIN TO HOLD HIS HANDS (TINY) ON THE WAY OUT. ADMIT IT, DONNIE J… YOU’RE TERRIFIED BECAUSE THIS WAS THE WORST WEEK OF YOUR LIFE BECAUSE OF ME, GAVIN C. NEWSOM. “THE MAPS” WILL END YOUR PRESIDENCY, RETAKE CONGRESS FOR THE PEOPLE, AND EXPOSE YOUR RIGGED “LITTLE GAME.”
Now that’s funny, and it’s very effective. Proof of that is Fox News host Dana Perino’s reaction, saying, “Stop it with the Twitter thing! I don’t know where his wife is. (snip-MORE)
Resist by Ann Telnaes
Everyone can contribute to protecting our democracy Read on Substack
A reader sent me this photo of a poster he created for an anti-Trump rally (He asked for permission. Thank you). I love it when you all use my work to protest… just please send me a photo and no revisions, like changing any text.

(photo used with permission)
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MAGA Motorboat by Clay Jones
Low expectations for the win Read on Substack

Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin held their summit yesterday at a military base in Anchorage, Alaska, and nothing came of it except validation for the Russian president.
Trump had put a deadline, HAHAHAHAHAHA, on Putin for a ceasefire in its war on Ukraine, which Putin started based on bullshit about Nazis in Ukraine. Now, you can’t find anyone in the Trump regime talking about his deadline. TACO done taco’ed out again.
Trump and Putin talked for two to three hours, when they were expecting a much longer summit. After that, they spent 12 minutes gushing over each other in front of the media, and unlike their little summit in Helsinki during Trump’s first term, they didn’t take any questions from the press.
Trump fashions himself as a great negotiator, which has always been a lie. He promised during the campaign that he’d end Russia’s war with Ukraine and Israel’s on Gaza in one day. It’s been almost eight months since Trump was sworn in, and there are no peace deals.
Trump said afterward, “There’s no deal until there’s a deal.” Remember, he’s a great negotiator.
He said, “I will call up NATO in a little while. I will call up the various people that I think are appropriate. And I’ll, of course, call up President Zelenskyy and tell him about today’s meeting. It’s ultimately up to them.”
Isn’t it nice that he’ll “call up” Zelensky, who was kicked out of the White House after being scolded by Trump and Vice President Couch Fucker? Trump plans another meeting with Zelensky in the White House. Good luck, Volodymyr.
Note the difference in the way Trump treats Zelensky and Putin. Zelensky has to travel around the world to meet Trump, and then gets scolded and kicked out of the White House for his trouble. But with Putin, Trump will travel to Alaska, literally roll out a red carpet for the guy, give him a ride in his armored limousine, and celebrate him with a flyover of stealth bombers, like they do at football championships. Maybe Trump thinks Putin won the Super Bowl.
On Saturday morning, Trump revealed that he and Putin decided not to try for a ceasefire at all, “which often times do not hold up,” said Trump, but instead work directly on a peace agreement. Well, why didn’t they think of that beforehand? And why the trip to Alaska if that’s all they were going to get out of it? (snip-MORE)
Still grifting after all these years by Ann Telnaes
Trump and his spawn continue making money off the presidency Read on Substack
The Guardian is reporting that World Liberty Financial, co-founded by Don Jr. and Eric Trump, has made the president and his family 500 million dollars so far.

=================================
Dildos and Big Balls by Clay Jones
This entire regime is a dildo Read on Substack

The FBI is now officially politicized. There are reports that Director Kash Patel, who’s not just a joke as director of the FBI (an organization he once said should be destroyed), but also as a human being, has assigned 1,000 agents to comb through the Epstein Files to flag mentions of Donald Trump. Now, he’s sending FBI agents after Texas state Democratic senators who’ve fled to other states so Republicans can’t build a quorum to vote on gerrymandering.
Trump told Texas that he deserves five more congressional seats, just like the time he told Georgia officials that he deserved 11,781 more votes in the 2020 presidential election.
What’s the FBI going to do when it finds a Texas Democrat? They don’t have any more authority than Cartman (respect my authoritah!) to apprehend, arrest, or detain a state senator avoiding a vote. The Democrats haven’t broken any laws. So, for anyone who says the redistricting in Texas isn’t illegal, then neither is avoiding a vote on it. This special session was called to deal with the flood, not to cheat and disenfranchise the voters. It should be illegal to abuse the FBI this way. It should also be illegal to gerrymander to prevent minorities from voting. Oh, wait. IT IS!
And poor Big Balls got beat up by a teenage girl. Edward Coristine, a former DOGE official, was attacked in Washington, DC. Trump and others claim a gang was trying to carjack him. Others claimed a woman was being carjacked, but Big Balls rushed in to save her and got himself attacked for his heroism. My cockles are warming up already. Such a hero…but wait!
Now it turns out, he may have been with the woman already, and his attackers were less of a gang and more like a couple of kids on bicycles. A report from Fox 5 said they attacked Big Balls until cops stepped in. Why are kids attacking a man in front of cops? There’s a lot of this story that does not add up. First up, how do we know Big Balls literally has big balls?
The report says they’re looking for a third guy, and he’s the right skin color for MAGA outrage. (snip-MORE)
Goons of Justice by Clay Jones
Trump puts another loyalist goon on a federal bench for life Read on Substack

Oops! I forgot to put satire in this cartoon.
I do that sometimes. I’ll draw a cartoon that illustrates exactly what happened. What happened here is that Republicans confirmed Emil Bove as a federal appeals court judge, which is a lifetime appointment.
They confirmed Bove despite him serving as Donald Trump’s personal lawyer in the hush money case that found Trump guilty on 34 felony counts. The appeals court is one level below the Supreme Court. A Trump loyalist will be on the court for life. He has more loyalty to Trump than to the Constitution.
He will serve on the 3rd U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, which hears cases from Delaware, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania. Bove will be as crooked as the judge in Florida who dismissed his stolen document case.
After Trump reentered the White House in January, he quickly made Bove a top official in the Justice Department where he worked on the dismissal of the corruption case against New York City Mayor Eric Adams, and the investigation of everyone who investigated department officials who were involved in the prosecutions of hundreds of Trump supporters who were involved in the Jan. 6, 2021, attack on the Capitol.
Bove has accused FBI officials of “insubordination” for refusing to hand over the names of agents who investigated the attack and ordered the firing of a group of prosecutors involved in those Jan. 6 criminal cases.
It was bad enough to put a supporter of Trump’s white nationalist terrorists in the DOJ, but now he’s going to be a federal judge.
The whistleblowers provided evidence to the Senate that Bove lied during his testimony, and that he suggested the department should ignore court orders when it came to Trump’s illegal deportations. There’s an audio recording of Bove making statements about the Adams case that contradict his testimony, saying that whoever signed onto the dismissal would be rewarded.
Chuck Schumer said, “It’s unfathomable that just over four years after the insurrection at the Capitol, when rioters smashed windows, ransacked offices, desecrated this chamber, Senate Republicans are willingly putting someone on the bench who shielded these rioters from facing justice, who said their prosecution was a grave national injustice.”
Susan Collins and Lisa Murkowski were the only two Republicans to vote against Bove’s confirmation, with Collins saying, “I don’t think that somebody who has counseled other attorneys that you should ignore the law, you should reject the law, I don’t think that that individual should be placed in a lifetime seat on the bench.”
Collins isn’t always right, like the time she voted to confirm Brett Kavanaugh to the Supreme Court, believing him when he said he wouldn’t overturn Roe. (snip-MORE, and it’s good)
(Note from A: I’m adding this photo, because Emil Bove reminds me of the photo)

Homeless Geese by Clay Jones
And no, it’s not about Gary Read on Substack

This was drawn for the Fredericksburg Advance, which wrote with the cartoon:
The Advance prides itself on attracting superior talent to our pages, and Clay Jones may well be at the top of the totem pole if awards are the measure. In 2022 he won the Robert F. Kennedy Award, and he has been a finalist for the Herblock Prize. What makes a great political cartoonist? That’s tough to say, but certainly the ability to make connections that others miss, and that force us to both laugh and think about issues in ways we may not have previously imagined — even (perhaps especially) when it makes us uncomfortable. That’s precisely what Jones has accomplished today, building off this week’s seemingly unrelated stories about geese and the endless struggle in our community over the homeless.
Dawwwww. Thank you, guys. That’s super nice.
I was just being silly with this, but proofer Laura said it was “silly, but kinda accurate.” I was afraid my editor would hate it because it was so weird.
Creative note: I wrote this Thursday night, and drew at home Friday night at the end of a long day. I wanted it to be finished before Saturday so I could focus on all the DC stuff.
Music note: Dammit, I don’t remember because I drew it two nights ago.
Drawn in 30 seconds: (snip-go see!)
Birthday Fascist by Clay Jones
Not even on your birthday Read on Substack

I’m sorry I made you wait for today’s blog, but I thought it would be more interesting to write the blog about Trump’s birthday parade after I actually attended his birthday parade.
And let’s not make mistakes about this. This military parade was not for the Army, but for Donald Trump.
Here’s the funny thing: I didn’t make it to the parade. Yes, I got a hotel room, and I planned to attend the parade, but three things happened. There were fences. Long long long fences. There was not a huge crowd, but it was tough to get through the snake of fences. Then, there were lines. But didn’t I just say the crowds were not huge? They weren’t, but the Trump organization likes to make people wait because it gives the impression that the crowds are large when they’re not.
And they must have expected much larger crowds because there were MAGA merchants everywhere. Yet, it didn’t seem like they were having a lot of customers. The street vendors selling ice cream had longer lines. I bought a cone.
If you want a huge crowd, go back to President Barack Obama’s inauguration. That was a huge crowd. Go back to Kamala Harris’ speech last November. That was a huge crowd. Or, go back to the last time I went to a Washington Capitals game. It was incredible if you could find a seat on the metro because the crowds were so large. But today, I took a metro at 5 p.m. and it was easy to find a seat. It wasn’t packed. And it wasn’t packed after the event either.
The parade started early because they wanted to beat the rain that never came. There were sprinkles, but nothing that should be able to stop a tank.
I said there was a thing that kept me from making it to Constitution Avenue, where the parade was held. The first were the fences, the second were the lines, and the third were the protests. The protests distracted me.
The official No Kings protests did not happen in Washington, DC. They didn’t want to start a fight. But, that didn’t stop independent protesters who did outnumber the MAGAts in my opinion. And readers, I feel bad because I wasn’t very nice to the MAGAts. You’ll see.
The closest thing I saw to violence was when a woman took a wild swing at a man holding a sign. They crossed paths, and she took a swing as they passed each other, which I don’t think she intended to connect. But he turned around and said, “Did you just take a swing at me?” She did not turn around, so he yelled, “Fuck Trump.” Yes, she was a MAGAt. And no, the man didn’t try to do anything violent. He kept on his way after yelling, “Fuck Trump.”
I had to know what was on his sign that made her want to take a swing, and here it is.

He hit a nerve. Here are some other scenes.

And then things got weird.
First, I saw this. (snip-yeah, go see it!!)
Ear Diaper Hater Club by Clay Jones
Read on Substack

In a telephone interview this morning with ABC’s Rachel Scott, Donald Trump said he “may” call Minnesota Governor Tim Walz about the targeted attack in Minneapolis that killed Melissa Hortman, a state legislator, and her husband.
In a moment that needs bipartisanship, empathy, and for a president to actually act presidential, Donald Trump said, “Well, it’s a terrible thing. I think he’s a terrible governor. I think he’s a grossly incompetent person. But I may, I may call him, I may call other people too.”
He just can’t do it. He gave it a shot yesterday, issuing a statement someone else obviously wrote, “I have been briefed on the terrible shooting that took place in Minnesota, which appears to be a targeted attack against state lawmakers. Our Attorney General, Pam Bondi, and the FBI, are investigating the situation, and they will be prosecuting anyone involved to the fullest extent of the law. Such horrific violence will not be tolerated in the United States of America. God Bless the great people of Minnesota, a truly great place.”
Forgive me if I don’t put a lot of faith into the investigative skills of Pam Bondi and FBI Director (sic) Kash Patel.
Trump blamed “hateful rhetoric” from the left when an assassin took aim at his ear. You’re not going to hear the term “hateful rhetoric” from Trump over the assassination of a state legislator in Minnesota.
We’re going to hear a lot of hypocrisy this week coming from MAGA Land.
For Trump, it was “hateful rhetoric” that got his ear shot, but the “targeted attack” on the left is a mystery.
I wanted to give you a long and in-depth blog on this, but I totally forgot while waiting at the airport. The worst part is, my flight was delayed for over two hours, so I had time to write it. Now, my flight is boarding and I’m still typing.
The next time you hear from me, I’ll be in California.
The view from my room:
I’m staying at the Sheraton by the Pentagon. Here’s the view I took yesterday afternoon. (snip-MORE)
Corrupt Bananas by Clay Jones
As Gwen Stefani said, “This shit is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S. Read on Substack

If you’re the president of the United States and you want to do a lot of corrupt bullshit, the first thing you do is hire corrupt people who will support your corrupt bullshit.
A sure way to tell someone is corrupt is by offering them a bribe. If they accept the bribe, then they’re good to go because they’re up to no good. Years later, when you need a corrupt Attorney General to vouch that accepting a $400 million plane from Qatar isn’t corrupt, Pam Bondi will tell the public it’s not corrupt, even though it is.
And then, when you need your spokesgoon to say something super ridiculous to defend you over selling access to the Oval Office, you hire Karoline Leavitt. Leavitt said it was OK for Trump to be at his golf club, hosting the top buyers of his crypto because he was off the clock, attending in his “personal time,” as though he’s just a guess. Get the fuck out of here.
The White House claims that Trump’s assets are in a “blind trust” managed by his two idiot kids, Sniffy Jr. and Eric. (snip-MORE, and it’s good!)
Republican bill cuts food aid for elderly, low-income, & disabled Americans by Ann Telnaes
and increased funding for their own version of Supplemental Nutrition and Assistance Program Read on Substack
