“Orange Ya Glad She’s Not In Heaven? by Clay Jones”

Bigots burn in Hell Read on Substack

Anita Bryant was famous for being a singer and had several hits way back in the day. Then she was known for orange juice as she became a spokesperson for the Florida Citrus Commission. Finally, she was known for being a bigot.

Bryant conducted herself as a wholesome Christian years before she campaigned against gay rights. Among her endorsements and products was a cookbook with a Jesus theme. It’s just not breakfast without orange juice and Jesus. Bless this bacon.

In 1979, she tarnished her image and her endorsements started to evaporate. What happened?

Dade County, Florida passed an ordinance that prohibited discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. This upset many bigots, one of them being Anita Bryant. Her fear was that LGBTQ people would be treated like human beings and the nation would stop discriminating and spitting on them. Bigots gotta spit. She led a highly publicized campaign against gay rights and gay people as part of a homophobic organization called Save Our Children. The organization later had to change its name as there was another group that had the name first, and who really wanted to save children and not just use them to push a homophobic agenda.

Bryant and her fellow homophobes feared gay meant pedophilia and LGBTQ people having equal rights would teach children to grow up and treat them like equal human beings. Bryant was against LGBTQ people working in schools and becoming role models. She believed gays were recruiting, which was true. Men all over the country were given free toasters in exchange for sleeping with other men, attending Broadway musicals, and being all-around fabulous.

Bryant said at the time, “What these people really want, hidden behind obscure legal phrases, is the legal right to propose to our children that theirs is an acceptable alternate way of life. I will lead such a crusade to stop it as this country has not seen before.”

During her anti-LGBTQ campaign, she said, “The recruitment of our children is absolutely necessary for the survival and growth of homosexuality… for since homosexuals cannot reproduce, they must recruit, must freshen their ranks.”

Here’s a fun fact: LGBTQ people are mostly born from straight parents.

She also said, probably while Jerry Falwell was standing beside her, “As a mother, I know that homosexuals cannot biologically reproduce children; therefore, they must recruit our children” and “If gays are granted rights, next we’ll have to give rights to prostitutes and to people who sleep with St. Bernards and to nail biters.” Nail biting is a sin? Was that the rejected 11th Commandment?

Also, the government needs to take my rights away because I used to sleep with a Beagle, and I’m not gonna lie. I miss sleeping with a Beagle.

Bryant was able to overturn the ordinance and continued her hate campaign throughout the nation. She galvanized America’s bigots but the LGBTQ community along with hetero friends conducted a campaign against Bryant and orange juice. Eventually, Bryant got pied. A civil rights supporter threw a banana cream pie right into Bryant’s face. Bryant responded with a homophobic slur, saying, “At least it was a fruit pie.”

I don’t know if I can condone or condemn the pieing as I’ve never had a banana cream pie.

Bryant said she loved homosexuals but hated their sins, which is bullshit.

Bryant eventually lost all her endorsements as she became toxic. Even other fundamentalist Christian organizations shunned her and stopped inviting her to their events. she stopped getting invites to singing events and even had a planned variety show canceled. Bryant eventually had to declare bankruptcy.

During the campaign against Bryant, bars stopped serving screwdrivers because of the orange juice and instead served Anita Bryant specials, which were made from vodka and apple juice which were hopefully served with a side of banana cream pie. Drag queens started impersonating Anita Bryant.

One of Bryant’s granddaughters came out and wasn’t sure about inviting her grandmother to her marriage to another woman. She should have invited her and not told her beforehand what was happening. That would have been fun.

Today, there are still bigots in government targeting the LGBTQ community and trying to suppress their rights. There are laws in places like Tennessee and Florida discriminating against drag shows. The should all be pied with banana cream pies.

I hope Anita Bryant, Ron DeSantis, that Duck Dynasty asshole, and every bigoted Republican likes pulp in their orange juice.

Thank you: To everyone who’s a subscriber, especially those who are PAID subscribers. You’re keeping me alive and free to focus on drawing cartoons, writing blogs, making videos, and creating my usual chaos for MAGAts. You rock! If you’re not a paid subscriber yet, please consider becoming one at $8 a month.

Music note: I listened to The Beatles’s Sgt. Pepper while coloring.

Drawn in 30 seconds: (snip-go see)

“That red bird comes all winter”

(Worriedman comments on another blog I read; I found he has a substack, and it’s beautiful. Enjoy!)

That red bird comes all winter /Firing up the landscape /As nothing else can do. by Worriedman

Mary Oliver – Red Bird Read on Substack

The whole poem –

Red Bird

Red bird came all winter

Firing up the landscape

As nothing else could.

Of course I love the sparrows,

Those dun-colored darlings,

So hungry and so many.

I am a God-fearing feeder of birds,

I know he has many children,

Not all of them bold in spirit.

Still, for whatever reason-

Perhaps because the winter is so long

And the sky so black-blue,

Or perhaps because the heart narrows

As often as it opens-

I am grateful

That red bird comes all winter

Firing up the landscape

As nothing else can do.

No way to go wrong with Mary Oliver!

I was really happy to take these photographs today! I filled the feeders yesterday. By this morning the word had spread! Places full of birds. I’m out of bird food now. It’ll be a week before I can get to Costco. I was hoping the Cardinals would show up when I put the food out yesterday! I love the one in the lower left that’s all puffed up.

Huck!

He has space issues.

Paulo! It’s hard to go wrong taking pictures of him. The trick is to put the Pale Blue Eye of Judgement right in the center of the photograph.

Can you feel him looking into your soul?

This is Fenn pretending she didn’t take a bite of my lemon bar while I went to get a fork.

She was guilty. Guilty as Hell. Her breath smelled like lemon curd.

Sam is obviously quite wise. He’s very much against Bitcoin.

I had the greenhouse to myself this weekend. It was nice! It was snowing pretty hard at sunrise on Saturday. Today was mostly clear when the sun came up. A few clouds to shed some color.

That’s all I got room for – thanks for dropping by! (snip)

Snow in Florida

(The title is the link to the poem, to find out more about it and the poet.)

Florida Snow P. Scott Cunningham

The Everglades are burning. I’m fifteen.
I open the window, knock out the screen

and crawl up the tiles to the apex of the roof.
Overhead the black clouds march on hooves

from the sunset to the ocean. It’s rare for the wind
to carry the sugar burns in my direction.

I assume the purpose of the fires is to make
the sugar sweeter, but besides covering the state

in smoke, all they do is make the harvest cheaper.
Some men spent a fortune to drain the river

but the cost was all up front. The stalks get so dry some-
times a piece of lightning starts the fire for them

and what’s left behind can’t help becoming tinder.
I think the land will tire of not being water soon.

 
Tonight the air is cold and smells like winter.
Ashes fall around me like pieces of the moon.

Copyright © 2025 by P. Scott Cunningham. Originally published in Poem-a-Day on January 7, 2025, by the Academy of American Poets.

Turn Left At Greenland

by Clay Jones

This map may not be entirely accurate Read on Substack

It’s weird we’re talking about our nation taking possession of Greenland. It’s even weirder we’re talking about taking it by force. It’s not a joke. Donald Trump is serious. He even sent Donald Trump Jr. there to make a point about taking the territory, unless he hoped Jr. wouldn’t come back. Unfortunately for our nation, he did.

Remember during the campaign when Trump promised “no more wars?” Now, he’s talking about starting three of them. He wants to take Greenland, which is a territory of Denmark.

Today, Sniffy Jr. shared a poll on X/Twitter showing that a high majority of Greenlanders wanted independence. What dumbass Jr. didn’t share is that the poll was conducted in 2019. I’m sure the numbers are close to that today, but if you want to cite a poll for your argument, you need one a little more recent than seven years ago. He also didn’t share that the question was “Can you envision Greenland being independent from Denmark?”. The poll, conducted by the University of Copenhagen, didn’t even ask if they wanted independence, just if they could see it in the future. It should also be noted that the poll didn’t ask if they wanted to become a territory of the United States.

If we’re going to use old polls, one from 2017 showed that 78 percent of Greenlanders oppose independence if it means a lower standard of living. Hey, Greenlanders, look at the standard of living in Puerto Rico.

Denmark is a member of NATO. The treaty is a commitment that every NATO nation will come to the defense of any other member who is attacked. It’s why Putin invaded Ukraine after Trump was defeated by Joe Biden in 2020. Putin believed Trump would destroy NATO. When Trump was ousted, Putin felt NATO was here for good and invaded Ukraine before Ukraine could apply for membership in NATO. That’s why it pisses me off when MAGAts say Putin never invaded while Trump was president. They ignore that Putin couldn’t as it would have been counterproductive to Trump’s attempt to destroy NATO. After Putin did invade Ukraine, two more nations joined the alliance, Finland and Sweden, the latter taking a neutral stance on all wars since 1814.

If Trump invades Greenland, every nation in NATO will be bound to defend Denmark’s territory, even Sweden….hell, even Canada. Trump would start a war with 31 nations, our own allies, by attacking Greenland. Has anyone told Trump this? Trump’s desire to steal Greenland is a new level of stupid that should be named after him. We could call it “Trump Stupid.”

Examples of Trump Stupid would be peeing on a car battery, having unprotected sex with one of Trump’s ex-girlfriends, giving Mike Tyson a wedgie, allowing your daughter to date Matt Gaetz, appointing RFK Jr. as director of Health and Human Services, staring into an eclipse, stating publicly that what you and your daughter have in common is sex, or voting for Donald Trump. Note that nearly half our nation is Trump Stupid enough to vote for Trump twice.

Trump is willing to start a war with 31 nations for a piece of property that has fewer people than Oshkosh, Wisconsin.

Trump is also looking at Canada becoming our 51st state. Canada is a nation of 33 million people which would make it our second-largest state (replacing Texas and eliminating them from bragging about how big they are, ignoring Alaska since it became a state in 1959) and would add around 50 new seats to the House of Representatives. This would give the Democratic Party control of Congress. Please don’t tell Trump that.

Good luck in making Canadians proud U.S. citizens. There are Quebecers who don’t even like being Canadians. Calling a Quebecer an American is akin to calling a Scot British. I learned about that one for myself.

Trump wants to take back the Panama Canal which is owned by Panama. We returned it to them and there’s a treaty for that. As we learned during the first Trump regime, he doesn’t care about treaties. Panama is not going to return the canal to us, so Trump is talking about taking it by force, making him the second Republican president (sic) to invade that country

Trump is also talking about invading Mexico to destroy drug cartels. That would violate Mexico’s sovereignty. An invasion of Mexico would be like an invasion of Afghanistan in that we’d be there for two decades at minimum. It would be a huge mess for us to clean up, even decades after Trump is gone. Get that smile off your face.

Trump wanting to rename the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of America is just him being belligerent. If he wanted it to be representative of the two continents (in case you’re a Republican, North America and South America), he’d propose calling it the Gulf of The Americas.

The Gulf has carried the name Gulf of Mexico since 1607, which is older than the United States. Mexican President Claudia Sheinbaum said North America should be renamed “América Mexicana,” or “Mexican America,” because a founding document dating from 1814 that preceded Mexico’s constitution referred to it that way. Someone tell Trump. I think “Mexican America” has a nice ring to it.

What happens if the United States changes the name of the Gulf through legislation? Only the United States would recognize it and turn into a situation like the Sea of Japan. It’s referred to as the “Sea of Japan” in Japan and the West while it’s referred to as the “Whale Sea” in China. Russia calls it the “Japanese Sea,” South Korea calls it the “East Sea,” and North Korea named it the “East Sea of Korea.” There’s a lot of contention over this as the Koreas claim the name “Sea of Japan” didn’t become accepted internationally until they were under occupation by Japan.

We can change the name of the Gulf of Mexico or any other geographic location we want, but other nations are not required to follow our lead.

If Mexico changes the name of the Gulf to the Gulf of Tiny-Finger Fuhrer, we don’t have to play along but I might anyway.

Fun fact: The Greenland shark can live up to 250-500 years. They don’t become sexually mature until they’re around 150 and their gestation lasts from eight to 18 years. My question is, What do they do with themselves for those first 150 years?

Creative note: I wrote this cartoon yesterday, and then I wrote the polar bear cartoon. I decided to go with the Polar Bear first because I had to finish up the cartoon for the FXBG Advance, and the bear cartoon would be quicker to draw. Drawing all the lettering and spending five hours on this cartoon was the better choice for today’s work assignment.

Drawn in 30 seconds: (snip-More)

Only Words

Well, here’s another one.

OK, though, I’ll stop for today after this one. I’m really trying to gather the energy to bake something. It’s supposed to snow some more today, though it is, I’m thankful, warmer today. Maybe a little more reading, then I’ll figure out something to bake. I saw a chocolate graham-looking cooky over on MPS last night, and I’ve been craving chocolate grahams since then.

Jim Benton Cartoons by Jim Benton for January 09, 2025

Jim Benton Cartoons Comic Strip for January 09, 2025

https://www.gocomics.com/jim-benton-cartoons/2025/01/09

Things To Think About Over The Next Couple of Weeks-

10th anniversary of the Charlie Hebdo killings by Ann Telnaes

On January 7, 2015 the editorial cartooning community suffered a horrible blow Read on Substack

The attack at the Paris offices of the satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo left 12 people dead, including five cartoonists, and set off a worldwide debate about free speech and satire.

Heh-

Dark Side of the Horse by Samson for January 07, 2025

Dark Side of the Horse Comic Strip for January 07, 2025

https://www.gocomics.com/darksideofthehorse/2025/01/07

Frazz by Jef Mallett for January 07, 2025

Frazz Comic Strip for January 07, 2025

(I just got my first debit card this past Nov.)

https://www.gocomics.com/frazz/2025/01/07

Free Range by Bill Whitehead for January 07, 2025

My kind of place, this is!

Free Range Comic Strip for January 07, 2025

https://www.gocomics.com/freerange/2025/01/07


Jim Benton Cartoons by Jim Benton for January 07, 2025

Jim Benton Cartoons Comic Strip for January 07, 2025

https://www.gocomics.com/jim-benton-cartoons/2025/01/07


Super-Fun-Pak Comix by Ruben Bolling for January 07, 2025

Super-Fun-Pak Comix Comic Strip for January 07, 2025

https://www.gocomics.com/super-fun-pak-comix/2025/01/07


Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Watterson for January 07, 2025

Calvin and Hobbes Comic Strip for January 07, 2025

https://www.gocomics.com/calvinandhobbes/2025/01/07

Have A Poem!

Those who have snow, and those who don’t-enjoy, anyway! This one is on a Substack I follow.

The Snowfall Is So Silent Miguel de Unamuno1864 –1936

translated by Robert Bly

The snowfall is so silent,
so slow,
bit by bit, with delicacy
it settles down on the earth
and covers over the fields.
The silent snow comes down
white and weightless;
Snowfall makes no noise,
falls as forgetting falls,
flake after flake.
It covers the fields gently
while frost attacks them
with its sudden flashes of white;
covers everything with its pure
and silent covering;
not one thing on the ground
anywhere it escapes.
And wherever it falls it stays,
content and gay,
for snow does not slip off
as it rains,
but it stays and sinks in.
The flakes are skyflowers,
pale lilies from the clouds,
that wither on earth.
They come down blossoming
but then so quickly
they are gone;
They bloom only on the peak,
above the mountains,
and make the earth feel heavier
when they die inside.
Snow, delicate snow,
that falls with such lightness
on the head,
on the feelings,
come and cover over the sadness
that lies always in my reason.


The snowfall is silent

The snowfall is silent,
slow thing;
little by little and gently
rests on the ground
and shelters the plain.
The snow lies silently
white and light;
the snowfall makes no noise;
falls as oblivion falls,
flake by flake.
Softly shelters the fields
when the ice harasses them;
with its flashes of whiteness;
covers everything with its cloak
pure, silent;
does not escape on the ground
anything.
Where it falls, there it stays
light and light,
because the snow does not slip
as the rain slides,
but it stays and sinks in.
Flowers from the sky the flakes,
white lilies of the clouds,
that wither on the ground,
They come down in bloom,
but they are soon
melted;
They bloom only at the summit,
over the mountains,
sorrow of the earth,
and in their entrails they perish.
Snow, soft snow,
the one that falls so lightly
over the head,
on the heart,
come and shelter my sadness
the one that rests in reason.

From Roots and Wings: Poetry from Spain 1900-1975 , translated by Robert Bly, edited by Hardie St. Martin, and published by Harper & Row. © 1976 by Hardie St. Martin. Used with permission. All rights reserved.

Joy!

This young man brings it!

(I got it from a Substack friend, here.)