This week I needed a quiet place to escape from my own head so I made one:
And then I added another swing because maybe you need a quiet place to be as well. We’re all in this together.
In slightly related news, I follow a lot of artists on instagram who share tips and tutorials and this tree idea came from Cathflo.art who I adore. Her tutorials aren’t in English but art is universal in any language. Also universal? Hope. Love. Joy. Kindness. Compassion.
That was supposed to say “Hello, friend” but I fucked it up and I’m leaving it because it feels equally fitting. Maybe you, like me, are in the darkness right now and are just trying to get by until the light comes back. It will. I promise. Between the weather, tricksy brains and (motions wildly to everything) all of the traumatic bullshit going on in the world right now, your body is just acting the way it probably should and you need to take care of it and be gentle to yourself.
This week I was planning on getting organized but then a depression hit me and I found myself staring at the blank gridded planner I’d bought because SURELY THIS ONE WILL FIX ME but then it didn’t fix me and so instead of outlining all of the stuff I’m behind on I instead screamed into the internet for bit, donated to several important causes, amplified what I could and then I turned off my phone and found myself doodling on the planner because my brain was just not going to be able to work the way I needed it to.
Each line counted off a moment. A sort of meditation.
I didn’t even have the bandwidth to find my sketch book so I just kept drawing, using the strange grids to find my way, and knowing each mindless pattern would get me closer to the other side, when I’d have the energy to be human again.
Dorothy Barker helped.
I’m using the word “helped” lightly.
And each doodle got me through a bad hour.
The terrible messy ones I drew when my hands shook from anger or anxiety.
And the calmer ones I drew in the quiet, small hours of the night when I needed to remember that there is peace and light out there even if we can’t always see it.
I drew and drew and dropped each picture onto the floor where the cats could lay on them and contemplate why I still wasn’t in bed yet.
And as of today I have not gotten anything organized at all and my planner is a mess of pointless drawings. Except (I remind myself) they’re not pointless at all, if you look at them with the right eyes.
“I am not good at planning. Or organizing. Or calculations. Or any of the things this ledger is supposed to be for. But I am quite good at silly little doodles. And that is worthwhile too.”
So this is just my little reminder to you…find joy…create…don’t be afraid to use a ledger as an easel or a dog as a paperweight or this letter as a hug. It’s okay if all you are doing right now is surviving. That is sometimes one of the hardest things you will do.
The Naked Pastor’s art has been posted here more than once. I receive newsletters since he got off Substack, (I think that’s how it happened? Or someone on Substack linked him.) Anyway, today’s newsletter is really nice to post with today’s news. I don’t have a link for the newsletter, so I’ll copy-paste it below. This is the link to his About page on his site. His site where all the art is!💖
Now here comes the letter. Many of the links go to his art pages, or authors’s Amazon pages, and he does sell his art to sustain his work (his work is not on Amazon, to be clear.) It doesn’t hurt to windowshop, but it’s perfectly fine to not click the links (except his About page!) I wanted to say something just in case going to a page might put someone off that this is all about advertising; it’s not. Again, here’s the newsletter! (And Bless The Badass is a fine piece of art!)
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I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how deep some of our cultural assumptions run, especially the ones that have shaped how women are treated. Some of these ideas are so old, so embedded, we don’t even notice them. But they are still here, quietly shaping how we build our systems, our theology, our science, and even our car seats. Let me show you what I mean. Cartoon: Bless The Badass! Dad Joke: ‘Jod’ Quote: Violence against women Original: All I Need is a Sliver of Light Merch of the Week: Question Everything T
Cartoon of the Week Bless the Badass! I bless the badass that you are! I am so inspired by so many women to be a badass myself! (BTW… several people have commissioned me to draw “Badass” for a loved one to make the person look like them.)
Dad Joke What if God just came down one day and said, “It’s pronounced ‘Jod’! and then left?
Quote From an expert criminologist on violence against women: “Statistically, we know now that once the hands are on the neck, the very next step is homicide… They don’t go backwards!” – Kate Manne, Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny. This next one is a fascinating book because it exposes just how thoroughly embedded is the patriarchy in our thoughts, attitudes, and treatment of women. “… if a woman became pregnant following her rape, it meant she had ultimately enjoyed herself.” – Eleanor Janega, The Once and Future Sex: Going Medieval on Women’s Roles in Society.
Women Suffer The above quote about a woman getting pregnant from her rape meant that she enjoyed it is based on the “two seed theory”. This theory, which lasted more than 2,000 years, taught that the man and the woman each contributed a seed when they both orgasmed, that these two seeds mixed, and that the dominant one determined the formation of the child. The only way a woman could get pregnant then was if she orgasmed. How condemning! I believe the residue of that bad theology and science is still deeply embedded in the patriarchal psyche. Janega’s research also reveals that whenever women began to succeed, men would attempt to put an end to it. For example, it was believed that embroidery was a woman’s task. But when women began to build successful businesses by embroidering clothing for the wealthy… that is developing a fashion industry… the men took over the businesses, and put the women to work as labourers. There are so many stories like that. Interestingly, though, all of this patriarchal maneuvering is rooted in philosophy, theology, and even science. It wasn’t just the ancient philosophers who proposed and espoused the two-seed theory, but theologians like Tertullian and Augustine, and scientists like Hippocrates. The assumption was that man was the gold standard of what it meant to be a person, and women were a spin-off of that ideal and therefore second-rate. This, of course, is rooted in the creation story of Adam and Eve. But once this assumption of supremacy is embedded in our thinking, then it determines every other thought that follows. I have a personal story. Lisa and I finally got a new car… something we’ve needed for a long time. It’s a Toyota Rav4. We need a reliable All Wheel Drive because Lisa often drives to work as a nurse before the plows clear the roads of snow. I want her to be safe and secure. We love it. Or, I should say, I love it, and Lisa isn’t so sure anymore. Why? Because she can’t get the driver’s seat comfortable. I was talking to a neighbour about her work car, also a Rav4, and she said she wouldn’t get one. Why? Because she can’t get the driver’s seat comfortable. I’ve heard of a few other women with the same complaint. I googled it, and it is a thing. This reminded me of another book I read by Caroline Criado Perez, Invisible Women: Data Bias in a World Designed For Men. As the title suggests, the book is filled with data illustrating how the world is designed by men for men. It’s not necessarily malicious. But when a car seat used to be designed, manufactured, and tested by men, women inevitably suffered. (Is this still going on?) This included seatbelts, especially for pregnant women. As well as little things like lower temperature settings in offices where men warmly wear suits or at least sleeves, while women are expected to bare their arms, upper chests, and legs. Like I said, it’s not necessarily malicious, but women suffer as a result. Just like science believed that women could only get pregnant if they orgasmed. It wasn’t necessarily malicious, but women suffered for centuries. This is why I think it is so important to question everything, including our most cherished assumptions, and to consider the consequences these assumptions have on those around us.
So my friend, if we want to build a more just, compassionate world, we have to be willing to ask hard questions about where our ideas come from and who they are leaving out. It is not just about our personal beliefs. It is about recognizing the ripple effects those beliefs have on others. Sometimes the harm was not intentional. But it is harmful nonetheless. I say, let’s ask more questions!!!
Amanda: This gives me Barbie animated movie vibes.
Sarah: His head is so big, and his neck is so long, and I’m also confused by the size of her head and the length of her arms.
This is giving me the uncanny valley vibes of that one Julie Anne Long Cover – not the smirking git one, the giant head lady one.
This one:
Sarah: “Head too big, arms too short” will be the name of my podcast about disturbing cover art.
Elyse: That’s similar to my favorite kitten/puppy stage “ears too big, legs too long”
Sarah: His neck is long, right? It’s not just me?
Elyse: I think it’s not long, it’s broken.
Sarah: “How.” ” How what?” ” How did you know that my father was Gumby?” ” Everyone knows your father is Gumby, my lord.”
Elyse: LMAO
Sarah: “I thought we had hidden it.”
“You thought you had hidden your lineage and connection to Lord Gumbert Rubberthwaite, Earl of Stretetshingtonshoreley?” … “Which is pronounced ‘Stretchley?’ Really, you thought that was a secret?”
Elyse: I would read that book.
From Kelly B: One-the title is Behind the Net but they are clearly in front of the net. And two-the physics required to sit on a hockey net like that.
Sarah: This is just awful on so many gravitational and proportional levels.
Amanda: Girl has got to be engaging her core like crazy.
(snip-go read it-it’s hilarious! And post your own comments below!)
Scottie's Playtime 