This week Iโve been struggling a little with the fact that I canโt do all of the things that I want to. My book comes out next week (youโre in it!) and I feel so excited and lucky but also terrified and filled with dread. I worry people wonโt like itโฆthat no one will show up to the book tourโฆthat Iโm failing my publisher because I canโt do some of the things that most authors would jump at because I just donโt have the energy or mental strength to say yes to everything without making myself sick. I even felt a little bad about drawing this week when I probably should be doing author stuff.
But then I reminded myself that I need this quiet drawing time (is it considered โquietโ when Iโm doing it while binging Dexter? I say yes.) to keep myself sane and to replenish my energy and to remind myself that I am more than just my work, and that itโs okay to not work yourself to exhaustion even if itโs for something you love.
I suspect we all struggle with this. Perhaps as parents or partners or in our careerโฆthe urge to try to be more than our bodies and minds allow, but not being able to because you areโฆhuman. Itโs so easy to put ourselves last when itโs for something else that you care about.
โThere is a fine line between beautiful and suffocating. Donโt forget to leave room for yourself.โ
So this is a reminder from me to you to make time for yourself if you can. To rest. To create. To refill your cup. There is so much beauty in what we do for others, for our work and for our passionsโฆbut there is also a necessary beauty in what we do for ourselvesโฆa beauty we often forget.
Sending love (and quiet moments of calm repose even when watching serial killer shows)
This morning I was in New York filming the Today Show where I managed to talk about explosive diarrhea, fears of my foot falling off, apologized for using my hands too much, sat on them, promptly pulled my hands back out bc I canโt talk without them and then made all the anchors put pencils in their mouthsโฆall within about 4 minutes. By this afternoon I was in Amish country in Pennsylvania where I met some very nice โfancy Amishโ people (this is a real thing) and did not pet a horse even though I really wanted to. Tomorrow afternoon Iโll be in Lancaster for my first tour stop and signing even though technically my book doesnโt officially come out until Tuesday. Then itโs back to NYC, and then a stop in New Hampshire for another reading and signing and then I get to go home for a week to rest for the next round. Iโm feeling tired, happy, lucky, scared, excited, embarrassedโฆall of the things. Oh, and did I mention my first book got banned from a Texas high school after a senate bill deemed it obscene and profane? Itโs been a busy week. I would link to everything but I canโt figure out how to do this with my phone
I should have written all this before I left but i was overwhelmed with packing all the wrong things and so instead Iโm writing this tonight, on the eve of my first new book event in over half a decade, to distract myself from the fear and from the incredibly loud but very happy drunken wedding taking place two rooms down from mine. It feels like youโre here, in a weird way. I know thatโs strange, but itโs comforting.
Iโve drawn in planes and cars and green rooms to keep my hands and mind busy but itโs a jerky mess so instead Iโm sharing a drawing from my new book, because it seems fitting while Iโm traveling so much in spite of the fact that I never know where I am. Itโs an adventure, after all, if I look at it with the right kind of eyes.
This person Same is interviewing is from the Cato Institute.ย Sam and David talk about the bigotry and attempt to purify the country of non-white people.ย tRump and his racist administration claim to want to remove 100 million from the US.ย ย There is no where near that number of undocumented people in the country.ย That number is almost 1/3 of the US population.ย Undocumented immigrants were estimated at 14 million in 2023 at the highest.ย So where are the rest of these people coming from?ย Legal documented immigrants and non-white citizens born in the US.ย That is why they are rounding up brown people who immigrated here legally and why they are trying so hard to end birth right citizenship.ย The goal has become clear and it is scary to me.ย To cement the white majority for as long as possible and stop the slow decline of the white majority / rize of minority demographics.ย ย Stephen Miller and the other racists in tRump administration want an apartheid state like the former South African one was.ย They want no rights for non-whites.ย They want no non-whites in positions of authority. The administration is going after businesses and higher education for not prioritizing whites over any other group.ย They feel no white male is less qualified than any non-white.ย If a non-white person scored 95 and the white person scored 75, these racists feel the white person is still more qualified because of their skin color.ย The racists feel the only DEI that should be allowed is the promotion of white males over everyone else. Hugs
The game plan is clear and was used to accomplish the genocide of the LGBTQ+ from society in Russia.ย Attack the most vulnerable and smallest members of the LGBTQ+ trans people in the name of saving the most vulnerable, who are the little children espcailly little girlsย / daughters.ย Every study proves that the ones in real danger or under threat are not the kids but the trans people.ย ย Then use the momentum and rising bigotry to remove all rights and equality from the rest of the LGBQ+ based on the same lies.ย End goal is to create a straight cis country where the Christian white male is making the country safe / regressive enough for their bigoted view of Jesus to feel comfortable enough to return and pat them on their heads.ย Hugs
The Idaho Senate has widely passed a bill that would fine local and state governments for flying flags that arenโt on the Legislatureโs pre-approved list.
The billโs House sponsor, Rep. Ted Hill, an Eagle Republican, has said House Bill 561 is meant to target the city of Boise for flying an LGBTQ+ pride flag. Boiseโs City Council voted to declare the pride flag and the organ donor flag as official flags, in an apparent move to work around the Legislatureโs flag ban law passed last year.
The bill would add a $2,000 daily fine, per offending flag, to the flag ban law from last year, which lacked an enforcement process. The bill widely passed the House earlier this month. But since the Senate amended the bill, it must return to the House before it would go to Gov. Brad Little for final consideration.
Rep. Ted Hill [photo] appeared here yesterday for his successful bill that criminalizes using the โwrongโ bathroom. Violating that law would be a misdemeanor punishable by up to one year in prison. A second offense within five years would be a felony, carrying up to a five-year prison sentence.
Hill appeared here in 2024 for his successful bill banning teachers from referring to students with their preferred pronouns.
Earlier this month, the Idaho House passed a resolution to petition the US Supreme Court on overturning Obergefell.
In February, the Idaho House advanced a bill to overturn all local LGBTQ rights ordinances statewide. Thirteen Idaho cities and counties, including Boise and its home county, have such laws on the books.
Project 2025 was very clear.ย The goal is to remove all representation of LGBTQ+ people from society.ย Pride flags are determined to be political incitement and agitation; media representation and books with even an LGBTQ+ character are called sexualizing children while the same with straight kids is not, and letting a child express how they deeply feel inside by letting them change their hairstyle and clothing is called child abuse while doing the discredited / harmful conversion therapy to force a person of any age to be straight and cis is considered to be healthy for the child. Liesย are spread constantly about puberty blockers by people who misrepresent what these medical studies show or only claim in fake medical studies that have no peer reviewed status by medical personnel in that field of study. The goal is to do what Russia, Hungary, and several other highly religious authoritarian countries have done, which is to wipe the existence of anything not straight and not cis from being. Iย don’t know if this is due to their being highly religious and wanting to force everyone in the country to live by their church doctrines or if they just are straight / cis so they don’t think if they don’t feel it that it can’t be true.ย I ran into that decades ago as a gay man with straight people claiming everyone was straight because they were and that was normal, but some people choose to be weird deviants and have bad types of sex.ย But if you ask them when they chose to be straight they think it is a stupid question as they never chose; they just were.ย Clips below.ย Hugs
โThey go in the bathroom theyโre supposed to, they upset people. If they go in the one that they now look like, theyโre breaking the law, which could include pretty severe penaltiesโ Guthrie told senators. โ โฆ We seem to be really focused on this space and ignoring the fact that there are people that are just like us, human beings, just like us. What are they supposed to do?โ
โDo I feel like going to jail today, or do I feel like being attacked?โ trans man testifies
The bill builds on a wave of anti-LGTBQ+ bills that the Legislature and the governor have approved in recent years.ย
โOver the last several years, legislators have gone from refusing to protect us to actively targeting us,โ Nikson Mathews, who serves as chair of the Idaho Democratic Queer Caucus,ย saidย at a news conference in February.
โEvery single day when Iโm out in public, I have to decide: Do I feel like going to jail today, or do I feel like being attacked,โ Mathews told lawmakers.ย
ย A bathroom sign as seen on March 16, 2026, at the State Capitol Building in Boise. (Photo by Pat Sutphin for the Idaho Capital Sun)
The Idaho Legislature widely approved a bill that would criminalize โwillfullyโ entering public and government bathrooms and changing rooms designated for another sex.
The bill โ which heads to Gov. Brad Little for final consideration โย would effectively block transgender people from using their preferred public bathrooms in Idaho, expanding on the stateโs transgender bathroom ban in public schools.
House Bill 752 would create criminal misdemeanor and felony charges for people who โknowingly and willfullyโ enter a bathroom or changing room designated for the opposite sex, with some exceptions. The bill would apply in government-owned buildings and places of public accommodations, like private businesses.ย
A first offense would carry a misdemeanor, punishable by up to one year in prison. A second offense within five years would be a felony, punishable by up to five years in prison.
Only three states โ Utah, Florida and Kansas โย ย have criminal bansย on trans people using bathrooms that align with their gender identity, according to the Movement Advancement Project, an LGBTQ+ advocacy group.ย
In a statement, Planned Parenthood Alliance Advocates โ Idaho called the bill โthe most extreme anti-transgender bathroom ban in the nation.โ
One Republican opposed the bill in the Senate
In the Idaho Senate, the bill passed on a near-party line 28-7 vote Friday, with all six Democrats opposing. One Republican,ย Sen. Jim Guthrie, from McCammon, broke with Republicans support of the bill.ย
He called legislation like it โharmful.โ
โThey go in the bathroom theyโre supposed to, they upset people. If they go in the one that they now look like, theyโre breaking the law, which could include pretty severe penaltiesโ Guthrie told senators. โ โฆ We seem to be really focused on this space and ignoring the fact that there are people that are just like us, human beings, just like us. What are they supposed to do?โ
Idaho Sen. Ben Toews, R-Coeur dโAlene, walks through the halls at the State Capitol building on Jan. 9, 2023. (Otto Kitsinger for Idaho Capital Sun)
Bill sponsorย Sen. Ben Toews, R-Coeur dโAlene, told senators that the bill protects โcommon sense realities.โ
โThe Legislature has a fundamental duty to protect the bodily privacy and safety of Idaho citizens,โ Toews said. โHouse Bill 752 provides a clear, proactive tool to secure sex-separated private spaces in our state, while accommodating common-sense realities.โ
Once the bill is transmitted to Little, he has five days to decide on it. He has three options: sign it into law, veto it, or allow it to become law without his signature.ย
In the House, the billย passedย on a 54-15 vote earlier this month, with six Republicans joining the Houseโs nine Democrats in opposition.
โDo I feel like going to jail today, or do I feel like being attacked?โ trans man testifies
The bill builds on a wave of anti-LGTBQ+ bills that the Legislature and the governor have approved in recent years.ย
And for more than a decade, efforts to add anti-discrimination protections for LGBTQ+ people to state law have failed.ย
โOver the last several years, legislators have gone from refusing to protect us to actively targeting us,โ Nikson Mathews, who serves as chair of the Idaho Democratic Queer Caucus,ย saidย at a news conference in February.
Mathews, a trans man with a beard, told a House committee earlier this year that the bathroom bill would force him to use the womenโs restroom.ย
โEvery single day when Iโm out in public, I have to decide: Do I feel like going to jail today, or do I feel like being attacked,โ Mathews told lawmakers.ย
A 2025ย studyย by the UCLA School of Lawโs Williams Institute found โno evidence of increased harms to people who are not transgender when transgender people are allowed to use restrooms and other gendered facilities according to their identity.โ But when trans people are refused access to facilities that align with their gender, the study found that trans people report verbal harassment and physical assault.ย
Bill is about discrimination, Democratic senator says
Sen. Ron Taylor, a Democrat from Hailey, said the bill is about discrimination. He said constituents told him that theyโd move out of Idaho if it passed โ because it would throw their transgender children in jail.
Idaho state Sen. Ron Taylor, D-Hailey, enters the House of Representatives chamber for the governorโs State of the State Address on Jan. 12, 2026, at the State Capitol in Boise. (Photo by Pat Sutphin for the Idaho Capital Sun)
โNow maybe thatโs what some of us want, is to chase a population thatโs marginalized out of Idaho,โ Taylor said. โBut thatโs not Idaho. Idaho was founded by a population that was marginalized.โ
Sen. Brian Lenney, a Republican from Nampa, said the bill is about keeping women and girls safe from having men in their spaces.ย
โTrans women arenโt women,โ saidย Sen. Joshua Kohl, a Republican from Twin Falls. โTheyโre men. And they need to be treated as such.โ
Sen. Jim Woodward, R-Sagle, listens to proceedings during the Joint Finance-Appropriations Committee meeting on Jan. 13, 2026, at the State Capitol Building in Boise. (Photo by Pat Sutphin for the Idaho Capital Sun)
Sen. Jim Woodward,ย a Republican from Sagle in North Idaho, said the bill is largely borne out of an event where he said a man was found in a womenโs locker room in a YMCA in Sandpoint. He said heโd vote for the bill, but he had some reservations.
โWhat comes next and how much further do we venture inside of a private building?โ Woodward said. โI donโt support the punitive measures in this bill, but the policy does reflect the sentiment of my community, and so for that reason, I will support it. It is the best for the most.โ
Sen. Melissa Wintrow, a Boise Democrat, said she saw people crying after a recent committee hearing on the bill.
โThey were crying because they just didnโt feel as if they were human. That a simple little thing they had to do, like go to the bathroom, would have to be in a law,โ Wintrow said.ย
Idaho Fraternal Order of Police opposed the bill
The bill was opposed by some law enforcement groups and several transgender Idahoans.ย
The bill outlines several exceptions, including to give medical assistance, law enforcement assistance, and if someone โis in dire need of urinating or defecating and such facility is the only facility reasonably available at the time of the personโs use.โ
The Idaho Fraternal Order of Police flagged that exception as concerning.
โOfficers responding to a complaint would be placed in the difficult position of determining an individualโs biological sex in order to enforce the statute,โ Idaho Fraternal Order of Police President Bryan Lovellย wrote. โIn many circumstances, there is no clear or reasonable way for officers to make that determination without engaging in questioning or investigative actions that could be viewed as invasive and inappropriate.โ
Kyle Pfannenstiel
Kyle Pfannenstiel is a reporter for the Idaho Capital Sun, covering health care and state politics. He previously reported for the Post Register/Report for America, Idaho Education News and the Idaho Press. Kyle is a military brat who calls Idaho home. He has a bachelorโs degree in journalism and political science from University of Idaho.
Idaho Capital Sun is part ofย States Newsroom, the nationโs largest state-focused nonprofit news organization.
This is about the save act.ย Chip Roy and the republicans constantly say it is no problem for people in the US to get a identifcation or be able to vote if they have changed their name via marriage.ย Fact is even Chip Roy’s own staff is struggling to get it done.ย And as Sam says that staff member gets the time off work and has the backing of a high level boss.ย The Save Act allows states to let people use the marriage license as a document but doesn’t require it.ย So only the blue states run by democrats will.ย Florida wont.ย And the state I was born in doesn’t allow for birth certificate changes without a court order.ย Roy says he doesn’t want to publicize this flaw or give it credit because the republicans want women / and gay men who might have changed their names to be blocked from voting.ย Again it is about promoting their view of a perfect world / and voter.ย A straight cis Christian white male who votes only for restrictive republicans and has a right wing ideology. Hugs
and, I hope, NOT misogynist. The other Dem candidate still has some answering to do in regard to that. That being said, he’d still be better than Susan Collins.Emphasis below is mine.
On Monday, days after Republican Sen. Susan Collins voted in favor of an amendment to Trump’s SAVE Act that would ban transgender students from girls’ sports nationwide, Maine Gov. Janet Millsโwho is running in a Democratic primary to unseat herโcame out with a forceful statement in favor of transgender youth in sports. Mills was asked about her position on a new ballot referendum that will likely go before voters this Novemberโwhich would ban transgender girls from sports, bar transgender students from bathrooms in schools across the state, and carve transgender students out of the Maine Human Rights Act in certain cases. It is Mills’ first time directly opposing the referendum, and a significant case of a Democratic candidate running for a swing seat standing up for transgender people.
“I would not support a ballot measure that demonizes children and demonizes and uses as a political ploy, as the Republicans have done, the right-wing Republicans have done, with this kind of initiative. It targets some of the most vulnerable people in our society,” Mills said at a press conference. “I brought up five daughters in Maine. They all played sports. They should all have an opportunity to play sports. My husband was a coach, a high school coach, and I saw, I always saw in the eyes of those kids, new energy, new feeling about life, a new way to engage in teamwork, to make new friends, and that’s what sports doesโgives you a different perspective on life, makes you a better human being.”
Her statement was in response to a referendum from “Protect Girls Sports in Maine,” an anti-transgender organization funded by far-right Republican megadonor and billionaire Richard Uihlein, of Uline office supplies, who donated $800,000 to bankroll the signature drive. The referendum successfully collected enough signatures to appear on the ballot this November. It would define sex for school purposes as “a person’s biological status as male or female recorded at birth on the person’s original birth certificate”โa definition that would bar transgender students’ legal recognition. It would require schools to “maintain separate restrooms, locker rooms, shower rooms, and other private spaces for each sex,” going beyond sports, and would create a transgender sports ban across the state. It would also create a private right of action allowing individuals who encounter transgender students in bathrooms to sue the school that permitted their accessโwhile carving all of these provisions out of the Maine Human Rights Act.
This is not Mills’ first foray into the fight over transgender athletes. In February 2025, Trumpย singled out Maineย at a meeting with Republican governors, threatening to pull federal funding unless the state banned transgender girls from girls’ sports. The next day, Mills confronted Trump at the White House, telling him,ย “See you in court.”ย What followed was anย unprecedented federal pressure campaign: six federal agencies launched investigations targeting the stateโall over a handful of transgender athletes out of roughly 53,000 high school sports participants statewide. When Maine refused to comply, theย Department of Justice suedย the state in April 2025โthat lawsuit is still ongoing.
Mills’ stance in support of transgender athletes is a notable position for a Democratic governor running for a purple Senate seat in an era where well-funded political pundits and organizations have aimed to push Democrats to the right on transgender issues. Her approach stands in stark contrast to that of fellow Democratic Governor California Gov. Gavin Newsom, a likely 2028 presidential contender, who has repeatedly thrown transgender people under the bus. In March 2025, Newsom told conservative activist Charlie Kirk on the debut of his podcast that trans participation in girls’ sports was “deeply unfair.โ And just weeks ago, in an interview with Katie Couric, he said he could not see a way for trans women to fairly compete on women’s sports teamsโwhile insisting he was not throwing the community under the bus. Mills, by contrast, is running toward the issue rather than away from it, and doing so in a competitive seat.
Mills, who is term-limited and cannot run for a third consecutive term as governor in 2026, is running against fellow Democrat Graham Platner for the chance to unseat Collins. Platner, for his part, has also been ardently pro-transgender rights. He opposed the referendum as early as November 2025, telling NOTUS that it “targets transgender kids and takes Maine backwards.” After Collins voted for the Tuberville amendment this weekend, Platner criticized her on social media, writing, “At a time when Mainers are dealing with rising gas prices and airport chaos, this is what she’s focused onโattacking kids and taking away your right to vote.” Of the referendum itself, Platner has said, “I think banning people from playing in sports in the gender that they see themselves as and identify as, doing that in a wholesale way, is going to be restrictive of people’s rights. So, I do not think that banning is the answer.”
The Maine Democratic primary is June 9, with the winner facing Collins in the November general electionโthe same ballot where voters will likely decide the fate of the anti-trans referendum. That means the fight over transgender rights in Maine will play out simultaneously on two tracks: the Senate race, where both Democratic candidates have now staked out firm positions in defense of transgender youth, and the referendum. How both play out could reshape the political calculus around transgender issues for Democrats nationwide.
The Annaโs Hummingbird is a characteristic and charismatic species of coastal Central, Southern, and Baja California, although this species has expanded its range northward along the Pacific Coast and eastward into the Desert Southwest. Like the Rufous Hummingbird, Annaโs is well known for its aggressive territorial behavior. Males fiercely defend feeding areas, where they chase away other male hummingbirds and even large insects such as bumblebees and hawk moths that try to feed there.
Although the Annaโs Hummingbird readily feeds from non-native plants, wild plants are still crucial to these birds โ and the birds are just as critical to these native plants. Annaโs Hummingbirds are important pollinators of the chaparral flora of coastal California. Many of these plants flower in the winter months, coinciding with Californiaโs wet season. To take advantage of this boon of nectar, Annaโs Hummingbirds in coastal California breed in what is the nonbreeding season for most North American species, nesting as early as mid-December. After the rains end, many hummingbirds will move up into the mountains to take advantage of blooms at higher elevations.
The Annaโs Hummingbird is a highly vocal species, especially for a hummingbird. Males sing a complex, scratchy-sounding song while perched and during their high-flying courtship spectacles. The male performs this diving display by first ascending to 100 feet or higher, then swooping toward the ground. At the bottom of his dive, he will be moving at about 60 miles per hour, just overhead of a female (or intruding male). At the last minute, he banks upward and flares his tail, causing his modified tail feathers to produce an explosive, high-pitched chirp. The gravitational force (โG-forceโ) caused by this maneuver would cause a human pilot to lose consciousness, but these little hummingbirds do it again and again, up to about 40 times back to back, when trying to impress a female. He also orients his dives to maximize the reflectance of his beautiful gorget โ the gem-like patch of tiny iridescent purple-pink feathers on his throat. According to researchers Christopher Clark and Stephen Russell, from the perspective of a female, he looks like a โtiny, glowing magenta cometโ plummeting towards her. (Snip-More on the page. Actually hear a hummingbird!)
The Emerald Tanager is truly a gem of the forest, roaming through the canopy in search of fruiting trees in the humid montane forests of Central and northern South America. Although primarily a fruit-eater, this species is also adept at hunting insects and other invertebrates on tree branches, deftly manipulating mosses with its bill in search of prey. This behavior sets it apart from other tanager species it often flocks with, but outside of the Emerald Tanagerโs range, other specialized tanager species may fill this niche.
The Emerald Tanagerโs relationship with moss extends beyond its foraging habits. Though their breeding biology is largely undescribed in peer-reviewed literature, the nests that have been observed have either been made of moss entirely or thoroughly covered in it. This, of course, provides good camouflage on the mossy branches where these tanagers build their nests. (Snip; MORE, and hear the Emerald Tanager)
It has been a joy to deconstruct my religious trauma alongside 32-year-old comedian Taylor Tomlinson. Four years ago, as I was coming out as queer to my family, I found her Netflix special Taylor Tomlinson: Look at You to be a warm welcome into the community of formerly Christian queer kids and purity culture survivors. Dark humor gave all of us a silly sort of grace, a space where we could grieve and grow.
Tomlinson, who was raised in a conservative Christian household in Temecula, Calif., got her start in stand-up through the church comedy circuit. But as she grew up, she began deconstructing how her conservative Christian upbringing was hurting her mental health and sexual development, deciding instead to be a โsecularโ comic.
Her new Netflix special Prodigal Daughter was filmed inside Fountain Street Church in Grand Rapids, Mich., which welcomed her not despite but rather because of her comedy. On her aptly named โSave Meโ tour, Tomlinson builds on a foundation of jokes about toxic Christian culture to call out not just people who weaponize religion as a tool for bigotry but also the people who make fun of those who still believe in God.
โBecause if God does exist, he does not exist to make you feel better than other people. He exists to make you better for other people,โ she said. โWe judge each otherโs coping mechanisms. Like, โYouโre a quitter if you get on antidepressants. Youโre stupid if you believe in God. B—-, Iโm on mood stabilizers, youโre on Jesus. Weโre all trying to get to โdead with Daddy.โโ
In fact, Tomlinson recognizes the people in her lifeโher grandparents, aunt, and uncle, himself a pastorโโwho are using religion correctly.โ
โThere are a lot of people who are using religion as a tool for community and connection and compassion and comfort,โ she says, โand when I was writing this hour, I was thinking about those people.โ
Cheekily, Tomlinson compares her own stand-up specials to her uncleโs Christian services. โWeโre both out here on the weekends, changing lives.โ
But the comedian is not here to absolve all the sins of Christianity or its effects on her.
โWhen you grow up in a religious environment, you spend a lot of your young adulthood untangling who you are from who they wanted you to be,โ she says. For Tomlinson, this is best represented by her โlateโ coming out at age 30.
Tomlinson explains that she has so many queer friends who are open and free about their sexualitiesโthe โSamanthasโ of the groupโbut she didnโt see anyone else who, like her, was nervous entering the queer dating scene. โWe need more gay prude representation,โ she chuckles, making those of us coming out at an older age and experiencing a real queer second adolescence feel less alone.
A second adolescence refers to how many LGBTQ+ people didnโt have the chance to experience the joys of teenage years. Because of rampant queerphobia inside and outside religious communities, we didnโt have access to the romantic and sexual โfirstsโโfirst crush, first kiss, first sexual encounterโthat many heterosexual people did because we were told repeatedly that our love and our bodies were shameful and had to be hidden.
While she doesnโt explicitly name โsecond adolescence,โ the significance of coming-of-age as a queer person runs throughout her special.
According to Adam James Cohen, a therapist specializing in helping LGBTQ+ patients, adolescence is critical to developing and cementing a personโs identity and sense of self. For those who missed out on that true identity formation earlier in life, second adolescence offers a mental and physical stage of healing and liberation, often involving people deconstructing their internalized anti-queerness and religious trauma. Sometimes this liberation happens through comedy, sometimes through therapy, or as Tomlinson discusses in her special, sometimes both. During this formational time, adults reckon with the grief of missing adolescence, and make up for lost time.
Second adolescence isnโt just a uniquely queer experience. Many people raised in far-right Chrisitan environments experience a new phase of psychosocial development after they leave their conservative Christian homes. For people raised in purity culture, their second adolescence can be a time of sexual exploration, experimentation, and liberation during and after deconstructing harmful theologies of the body.
For the queer Christian kids like Tomlinson, we were robbed of moments of bodily and social experimentation and generation, so experiencing our second adolescence is like coming home to our bodies, an emotional rebirth or reversion, to put it in Christian terms, of learning and loving to be a queer child and queer teenager again. For trans and nonbinary people undergoing gender affirming medical care, second adolescence can be even more physical, as hormone therapy brings about a second puberty.
And for many of us, this second adolescence is characterized by an eagernessโand joyโto accept and share the possibilities that many never questioned. As Tomlinson joked, โWhen I started dating women, it was the closest Iโd come to feeling religious in a long time because my friend would complain about their boyfriends and husbands and I was like, โHave you heard the good news? You donโt have to live like this. Thereโs a better way.โโ
Second adolescence is especially common among people who have a later-in-life realization or acceptance of their LGBTQ+ identity, often called a โqueer awakeningโ or โsecond coming out,โ just like Tomlinson. There is no time limit on coming out or discovering and affirming gender or sexuality, but as Tomlinson jokes in her special, โcoming out as bisexual at 30 feels like saying to a waiter, โBy the way, itโs my birthday.โ Theyโre like, โCool, sing to yourself. Youโre a grown woman.โโ
Tomlinsonโs special portrays this second adolescence with a humor, grace, and visibility I hadnโt encountered before but am deeply indebted to. Prodigal Daughter, and her comedy as a whole, carries special poignancy for the formerly queer Christian kids coming of age through humor and deconstruction.
Hereโs how I repurposed my empty tissue box as a plastic grocery bag dispenser in a few easy steps:
Take a plastic shopping bag and stuff it horizontally into the tissue box with the handles sticking out of the slit on top.
Grab another plastic bag and weave it through the handles of the bag sticking out of the box, then stop once itโs about three-quarters the way through.
Stuff both bags into the box, with the handles of the second bag sticking out again like you had before.
Repeat the process until all of the plastic bags are in the box (I was able to fit about 12 bags in mine!)
Gently pull a bag out of the box when you want to use it, just like a regular Kleenex box! Follow steps 1 through 4 to refill when you have more bags to store.
A few things I ran across before lunch, in one post with links. Ollie and I had a good lunch, got a few things done, then took a nice walk on a cooler day when his thick black fur coat is not too heavy for him to be on a jaunt before 7 AM; it was 2 PM.๐
Back to reality, I saw this Reuters story about Iran hacking US FBI, but it was a subscriber only story (I agree-WTF? Why should profit be made on a story like that, when some of the free articles are such dreck…) But, here is a free one:
The vigilante group Handala Hack Team said that it had successfully gained access to Patelโs personal email account.
Then, I know many of us, if we didn’t yawn, noticed the hypocrisy in wrangling for a law that includes banning mail-in voting while on the way to the post-box. If you’re busy, just click through; the money phrase is right there at the top.
The young woman who is running for my district’s US House seat, Katy Tindell, has a website now! I’ve mentioned her, but couldn’t link because all there was was an Act Blue contribution page. But now, she has her own website.
Every one of our states has at least one candidate like this running. Please choose a campaign anywhere (But work from your home district/state first, if you can,) and sign up. Money’s tight everywhere, but give the candidate some time if you want to see them in office. There are many things that need doing, and campaigns are better off with volunteers helping.