Illegal Firefighters by Clay Jones

Maybe don’t deport the guy putting out your fire Read on Substack

Is every department in the Trump Regime headed by an idiot? Yes. Yes, they are.

The Defense Department is headed by a drunk womanizer whose qualification is that Trump liked the way he looked on Fox News. The Justice Department is led by a woman Trump has previously bribed, so he knows she’ll be loyal. The State Department is headed by a guy who is a coward, can’t think on his feet, and once insinuated that Donald Trump has a tiny penis, but fell in line shortly after that. The Department of Education is led by someone who may not be able to spell “education.” The Health Department’s chief is a guy who believes in chemtrails and that vaccines cause autism. The secretary of the Commerce Department doesn’t know that tariffs are taxes, and is an evil fuck who immediately ceased paying the salaries to the families of all his employees who died on 9/11. The Director of National Intelligence doesn’t have intelligence. The vice president (sic) is into dolphin porn and couch fucking, and doesn’t care that Trump may be America’s Hitler, as he has claimed in the past. And the head of the Department of Homeland Security, which oversees ICE, is a puppy murderer.

And since the head of DHS, Kristi Noem, is so evil and stupid, she’s arrested firefighters while they were fighting a forest fire.

Two firefighters were arrested last week while working the Bear Gulch fire in the Olympic National Forest in Washington State, which, as of last Friday, had burned about 14 square miles and only 13 percent of the fire contained, forcing people to evacuate their homes.

One of the firefighters was on track to achieve legal status for helping the federal government with a previous investigation. Border Patrol said it had been helping the Bureau of Land Management with a criminal investigation into two contractors working at the fire and a hat-wearing bear stealing picnic baskets when it discovered two firefighters who they claim were in the country without permanent legal status. But they were fighting a fire, so leave them alone and go find that bear.

The lawyers for one of the firefighters say his arrest was illegal, and violated DHS polices that say immigration enforcement must not be conducted at locations where emergency responses are happening. That makes sense. (snip-MORE)

Wishful Thinking by Clay Jones

He only looks dead Read on Substack

A trend about Trump’s health trended over Labor Day weekend which started rumors about Trump’s health, and even spread conspiracy theories that he had died.

No matter what the rumors say, Trump can’t be healthy. He’s 79, and the oldest president sworn into office. Joe Biden was 78 years and 61 days, and Trump was 78 years and 220 days. His maturity is still at 12 years of age.

Recently, Trump has been spotted with a weird bruise on his right hand, and he has cankles.

Last week, JD Vance was asked if he was ready to take over in case of a “tragedy,” and while he praised Trump’s health, he also praised his readiness to take over. This added fuel to the rumor fire, which was already blazing as Grandpa didn’t have any events scheduled over the three-day holiday weekend, though he did play golf Saturday morning.

The White House claimed his hand is bruised from “frequent handshaking.” How fragile is the old man?